Wth is wrong with People, the feel Helping you is pushing you farther over?
By Dawn C
@indiandevil (2477)
Canada
August 28, 2009 5:14am CST
I can not believe how stupid all my "friends" truly are. I went to my first meeting wednesday night. I know my problem lies with core beliefs and goes farther back in child hood then I first thought. I also have pinpointed the source.
My biggest core belief is that no one will ever love/like me the only pretend to.
So somehow my friends including this guy I done this for, have gotten the stupid idea in their heads that the best way to "help me" is by cutting off all means of cummunication with me, except for throwing my triggers in me face! My own cousin said to me "we think this will help you heal".
I was like what the heck is wrong with all you people?
At this point in time I am on tetering on a cliff, to the back is happiness, to the front are ppointed rocks and, instead of having my friends in front holding me up out of the rut I'm in, they all pushing me from behind.
I told her I was like wtf? You all really think that is helping me? I need support to get thru this. Helping me back to believe that my fears are wrong people do care about me they there when I need them most. Instead your all acting like a bunch of morons, aiding me to Believe my core beliefs are true. Your all just driving the wedge deeper. Would you all hand a suicidal person a knife and walk away too?" And I logged out with no response that really ticked me off, I'm going through extreme hell, and they think its just one big game.
I will give the guy the benefit of saying hes not involved in this bs, however if I dont hear from him tonight which is seven days after the fact they are all being removed from MY life cousin included.
2 people like this
4 responses
@picjim (3002)
• India
28 Aug 09
It's not that people are trying to push you further over,it's just that some unfortunate childhood event has reinforced the belief that no one likes you or loves you.People will love and like you.Only choose true friends who understand you and stand by you.There will always be some who don't believe us or share our value system.It is better to keep such people at arms length.Just be open to positive influences of others and select friend carefully there will always be people who stand by you and not take advantage of you.Just think those who cut off all means of communication ...are they really worth having as friends?
@indiandevil (2477)
• Canada
28 Aug 09
Thank you and yea, I just cant see where they have gotten their views from. It hurts really bad though that I found these people the closest friends and yet, they all act like this on me. Its like no one understands what I'm going through and what I need and just play stupid mind games they think will help me. And yea they believe me that my issue is there but, they dont seem to get that I am in group theorpy with a trained counselor and I know a lil bit more about what is wrong and what I need then any of the others. I do not need to feel isolated at this time I need ppl to let me know they are there and care. That way I can re program myself to see that all these ppl actually love me and im being silly thinking no one loves me. Its kind of hard not thinking no one loves me, when no one is around me loving me!
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
24 Oct 09
hi indiandevil I think you need to find some real friends, people
who like you and have at least a little in common with you. at least you can always choose your friends but relatives that is a lot harder. For one thing with this deep seated belief you have
that nobody will ever love you, you have to love yourself first.
Here is something to try, first call out I,use your first name, love my self,I am somebody, I am unique, I am put yourwhole name there, now repeat these only really yell if out, I love my self, I am unique, I am somebody, I am put your name here. do this with conviction.You must love yourself first so you know how to love others, and you will get more confident in yourself.
a mental health expert would tell you the same thing,but I am doing this for free. he he ha ha. good luck throw back your shoulders, and believe everything is going to be better.
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
7 Sep 09
hi indiandevil hatley here.sounds like you have some false friends'who have undermined your faith in yourself.dump them 'as they are poisonous friends and find people who support your own'core '
belief.you sound very well educated so find people to be your'
frients who are also intelligent.Some times you can find a
friend by helping and being friendly yourself. A real true'friend will be with you andwant to help you in times of crisis like my best friend has been with me. she is always ready to lend a helping hand and she'listens to what I hAve to say.she never belittles me or tries to'make me be something I am not.those kind of people are around
you so you just need to look.good luck God bless you.
@LetranKnight25 (33117)
• Philippines
28 Aug 09
It's ok. maybe you might take this the wrong way but i think theyjust gave the wrong advise by staying away from you. or simply there's something about them that they didn't want from you that they prefer to back off. one person can do that but almost every one, even your cousin, that's weird. I smell consipracy *sniff sniff*
