Is the marriage worth saving?

Have you talk to your husband to see why his family is treating you that way. My feeling is that when a guy loves his wife he will not tolerate anyone disrespecting her. Also, there is no reason the kids should be treated badly. Talk to your husband and get his take on the situation and what he feels the next step should be.

Is it just his family or is it your husband too? What kind of support are you getting from him? How is their neglect of the children affecting him? I think the answers to those questions would make it a lot easier to determine if the marriage is worth saving.

Have you talk to your husband to see why his family is treating you and the kids that way. My feelings is that when a guy loves his woman he will not tolerate anyone disrespecting her. Also, there is no reason the kids should be treated badly. Talk to your husband and get his take on the situation and what he feels teh next step should be.

From reading all the posts here, I would have to agree with everyone and put both your feet down. That means give them a choice, they change their attitudes and disrespect or they have no relationship with any of you. But that also means your husband will not have much of a relationship with his family. If he treats you well and loves both you and your kids than I believe that the marriage is worth saving. But the relationshp with his family is not.
Have they always treated him this way too? What about his siblings? Have you discovered why this is happening? Do they think your husband married the wrong person or what? But it sounds like you are a rational and mature person so I don't know why they wouldn't like you.
This is my philosophy: Life is a period of time, and any person, place or thing that wastes time and makes you not cherish life is not worth your time. So cherish your husband and family and try to have as little contact with his family as you can.

The question is, do you love your husband? If the answer is yes, stay married. You must talk this out with him. Good luck dear.

Just remember that you married the guy and not his family. This type of situation is very common especially if they're very close to each other, I think they just feel that you took your husband's attention away from them. Just accept it as it is, if you're in the same household or reside near your husband's family, it is best that you transfer to place farther away and limit your visit. Don't blame your marriage because of what's happening now, and don't let you husband choose between you and his family either, the mere fact that he's very supportive is enough reason that you should make the marriage work. As you grow older, your in laws resentment towards you will disappear especially if you prove to them that you're willing to stick it with your husband no matter what. Remember that you have your own family now and it is your duty to make it work. Cheers!

Family, especially in-laws, can cause a great deal of problems in a marriage as your has. However I think that as long as your spouse is on your side and let's his family know that you come first there should be no reason to walk away.

If however he does not defend you or try to straighten them out and especially if he gives you the feeling he may cannot stand up to them it may be a time to seriously consider leaving. This would assume that you have had a nice long talk with him about how you feel and nothing was resolved.

From my perspective, your spouse always comes first. I was married to a woman that my family was fairly cool to. Part of it was because she felt so uncomfortable with then that we spent very little time with them before she would want to leave.
Regardless, she came first and I tried my best to be the go between. Not an easy place to be.

The question to ask yourself is where is my husband on this and do I come first?
If you can answer yes to that you need to sit down and work this out with him. He must help you understand where the problem is so that perhaps it can be worked out.
I wish you well.

I think, if you have done any thing to reach them, don't spent your time again for do it. You must have a principle that you can do many thing without them, you can work, your life goes on and they can influence your life. As long as your behave didn't hurt them. Don't hurt them, do a good things to them and God knows it. Be strong. You are a strong woman, that can do many thing without their support. Go away..

The big question is how does your husband feel about how they treat you. has he spoken to you about it and spoke to his family. If he treats you right and is happy with you then, your marriage is worth saving. You don't live with these people and I hope you have your own family and friends to lean. Forget them.

How to Decide if Your Marriage is Worth Saving
Step
1

Recognize physical or emotional abuse. Physical abuse is easy to recognize. The one question to ask yourself is, "Am I afraid of my spouse?" If the answer is yes, it is time to end the marriage. Many choose to ignore or do not recognize emotional abuse. Some common signs of emotional abuse are constant criticism, berating, insulting, treating as inferior or a servant, demanding gratitude and isolation from family and friends. Anything that makes you feel bad about yourself on a regular basis can be considered emotional abuse.

If you have an abusive spouse that is unwilling to seek help, you can only expect the abuse to get worse. It is time to end the marriage. Don't wait until it's too late. The National Domestic Violence Hotline, 800-799-7233 (ndvh.org)offers referrals and advice.
Step
2

Acknowledge infidelity. Many couples are able to work through the feelings of betrayal that an affair brings. If you or your spouse feel that over time this transgression can be forgiven then your marriage is worth saving. If not, it is probably better to end the marriage.
Step
3

Question your true feelings and answer them honestly to yourself. Are you still in love with your spouse or are you in love with the idea of marriage? Do you enjoy being with your spouse or does time together leave you irritated, depressed or wishing you were alone or somewhere else? Do you respect your spouse and feel supportive in values and beliefs?
Step
4

Connect problems that recur. A pattern of fighting over trivial matters, disagreeing about everything, cruel teasing, refusal to work on major issues, an unwillingness to compromise and always bringing up past hurts indicates that there are some serious problems in the marriage that may be beyond repair.
Step
5

Measure the intimacy in your marriage. Intimacy is defined as a close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person. Does this describe how you feel toward your spouse or do you try to avoid affection and personal contact?
Step
6

Inspect other relationships to see if the problems in your marriage are affecting how you relate to others and how you do your job. If others get a sense of sadness, moodiness, frustration, anger, fear, inattentiveness or impatience from you it might be time to end the marriage.
Step
7

Appraise your own health. How is your stress level? Are you sleeping well? Eating properly? Exercising regularly? Attending to personal hygiene as you once did? If the problems in your marriage are having an effect on your personal health it might be time to end it.
Step
8

Seek counsel if you and your spouse have come to a point where you can no longer communicate. Sometimes an outsider can offer perspectives on problems that seem hopeless.
Step
9

Determine to give your all to your marriage for a designated period of time. Make your best effort and really try to improve your marriage. If at the end of this time you still feel hopeless, you will have a feeling of closure knowing you did your best to save the marriage.

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