Just hit me that im still not over her
By Leo
@d_e_v81 (360)
Singapore
December 18, 2009 2:55pm CST
There was this gal at my workplace that I really liked. I never knew it until she revealed to me that she was quitting. Realising that I was not gonna see her so often anymore, it suddenly dawned on me that I liked her. bummer.
We have talked about it but she is only into dating guys her own race and such. Besides she was already attached. She has hung out with me once or twice but only with a group of friends.
Today my buddy and I went to Butter Factory (a CLUB). While standing outside, I saw her. Her hair was different. She had permed it. But I would recognize her anywhere, anyway. I called her and asked her to turn around. When she saw me she walked towards me, said some niceties then said she had to go and left. The thng was, there was this other guy having his hand around her waist. I knew it wasnt her bf as I have seen him before. It has been 3 months since I saw her and I thought I was over her till I bumped into her again. I got jealous. Angry. Sad. All at the same time.
And it hit me like a ton of bricks. All over again.....Im still not over her
Now Im drunk (did i mention i just came back from clubbing?). Feelin down. and itz 455 a.m. and im here typin on mylot. See what gals can do to yea? haizzzzzzz.
Feel like burnin somethin up....lol
1 person likes this
13 responses
@chulce (1537)
• United States
19 Dec 09
I am so sorry this happened to you. I wish people would push pass the whole race thing. If you truly like someone learn more about them. Learn more about their culture. For heaven's sake date them, see if there are even more mutual feelings.
But beside that. I have to agree with some of the other comments made, there will be others and who knows you may find the one that curls your toes and adds a lightness to your step. One day you will find someone that will keep you smiling all day long and you will feel them in your heart when you are apart.
Good luck dating... I am out of that game and have been for almost 19 years. I remember the days of dating. Hard to believe it really wasn't that long ago.
Good luck with the hang over as well.
1 person likes this
@d_e_v81 (360)
• Singapore
19 Dec 09
Hi,
I do believe she is not racist or anything. But she had revealed to me that her mum is not too keen about havin her seein other guys besides her own race. She revealed this to me even before she knew I liked her. Its kindda hard to compress my rp with her in a short response but she does organize outings and she makes sure im in it somehow. Its just that ever since she knew I kindda liked her, she has set some clear boundaries like not goin out with me alone even though she has done so in the past. lol. I know this all sounds kindda weird now but I hope things will get clearer as I respond to the other responses. I got 16 more to go...lol.
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
19 Dec 09
ho d_2-v81 thats what you get for letting yourself get
smitten by a gal whose already got a boyfriend. why did
you think she would just drop him, and fall madly in
love with you? those are dreams, not reality. find a
girl thats not attached and then make goo goo eyes at
her.She is much more apt to respond as she is not in
love with anyone. Drinking is not going to solve your
problem just make you feel awful. there are more girls
in the ocean so to speak so cheerup, and go find a girl
who is single, and gets your vibes. you will find the
'right girl soon just wait and see.
@d_e_v81 (360)
• Singapore
19 Dec 09
the thing is...I was the one most resistant to the idea initially and told myself i would never fall for her cos I knew she had a bf. But when she told me she was not gonna be workin there anymore and I wasnt gonna be seein her that often anymore i became...i dunno...kindda like wad kryptonite does to superman? lol
@LilyoftheThorns (12918)
• United States
19 Dec 09
aww I'm sorry d_e_v...I know how you feel! Believe it or not this can happen to girls too! lol
But I think a good ol' cliche will fit nicely here: "there are plenty of fish in the sea." -- You'll meet someone else, you'll fall in love with her and you guys will have an awesome life together! Just keep telling yourself that and it will eventually happen. There are plenty of women out there just waiting to meet you :D
@d_e_v81 (360)
• Singapore
19 Dec 09
Haha...I know, and like I said to a previous response...I have been datin around and was doin fine. Till I bumped into her last night with someone else....and then...back to the drawin board I guess...lol
P.S: have already accepted your friend request :) thanx!
PPS: how do you put up your profile pic? I cant seem to figure out how to do it. Mylot NOOB in the house...:p
@smileonstar (4007)
• United States
19 Dec 09
HI,
if you like her then tell the truth. If she said she dates only the same race then I dont think love will go that way. Do you think she really that picky? lolz... well, I dont know but it might be for some women. If you are not over her then you have to call her and tell her how much you are in love with her
@d_e_v81 (360)
• Singapore
19 Dec 09
I dont think thats really a good idea. If im not over her...I will be. Maybe my ego got a li'l bruised and thats why im feelin this way. And callin her will only make me seem desperate. The line works both ways...if she needs me...she'll call....if not...oh well...like wad many of you have already said....plenty of fishes in the sea....
@Theresaaiza (10487)
• Australia
19 Dec 09
It's funny how we hate those kinds of feelings and yet we keep nurturing them jsut because we really don't want to get over THAT feeling. Getting over someone I guess is a choice. Besides, nobody does it for you. About that "dating only the same race" thing could just be alibi. I am not saying that you are not a lovable person. Well, anyway how should I know, right? But I believe everyone is lovable in his or her own right but I guess that girl doesn't see that. I dont also know the culture that she has so perhaps her reason was enough justification, but well I know a lot of people who believes that love has no boundaries whether or not you are of the same race.
The horizon is wide, D, so explore it. Believe me there are many fish in the sea. :)
But you see there is a right time for everything.
@d_e_v81 (360)
• Singapore
19 Dec 09
errrm....I do think she likes mee. The way I see it...she is restricted by her current rp and the restrictions her mum has posed on her abt dating guys outside her race. Cos the way she behaved around me before knowin and after knowin had been starkly different. YESSSS I KNOWWW THE HORIZON IS WIDE.... maybe I just wanna get through this feelin crappy phase before movin on...lol
@blablablu (221)
• Indonesia
19 Dec 09
LoL. That's why some old saying say like this "grab your chance whenever you can" and "second chance is not an option" :)
Well, if you do like her then I guess you should let her be (even she is unhappy with her current BF). If you really want to wait for second chance, you may do as you wish, but it will be like waiting for a snow fall in tropical area :p
Just move on and live your life brother, there are still lot of girls waiting for you out there :D
Good luck!
@d_e_v81 (360)
• Singapore
19 Dec 09
Yep...Ive been grabbin my opportunity wherever I can....lol. Thing was I was doin fine till I saw her again yesterday which was hard. and yes, she has revealed to me a coupla times that she is unhappy with her current bf. maybe that would explain why she was in the club with another guy. Well, he was her own race though so I think he has an advantage over me...lol
@djbtol (5493)
• United States
19 Dec 09
That is a bummer. Sounds like she really does stir your heart up, but I suspect the feeling is not mutual. I know having such a person in the workplace can certainly brighten things up and make the job better. Maybe another special lady will come along soon.
@clocks123 (1225)
• United States
19 Dec 09
Hi she already gave you her answer as you stated above, she wants to date guys her own race and such... You can try to tell her how you feel and see how it goes, but it appears she wants to be with other guys than you. You will find a much better girl just for you believe me.
@d_e_v81 (360)
• Singapore
19 Dec 09
Yea thats true but sometimes I feel she is an attention seeker even though she may not have any real feelings for me. for instance, if I have not been talkin to her for awhile, she would like disturb me on facebook or sms me out of the blue and such. These things really had me confused. So yea...I KNOWWWWWWWWW Im in the gettin over process but still seein her with another guy was hard...
@sirnose (2436)
• United States
18 Dec 09
Welcome to the club buddy it's called "smitten and bitten" you're get over it one day. What a bummer? especially when you can't do a thing about it but leave it be. I don't know why these thing happen but they do I'm getting over my last episode of the same thing,but I'm just about over mines I saw the little filly yesterday and felt little if any emotion about her or what could a been. So you see you will get over this it just take time...and the sad part is that its going to happen again with someone else in the future its called being human...
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@good2go2001 (915)
• United States
18 Dec 09
Awwww i feel so bad for you. I have been there too its very hard to get over someone. Did she ever know that you had these feelings for her? Well the best advice i can give to you is to start looking around for someone that makes you have all those feelings all over again. Its obvious that she is now taken and no sense beating yourself up more and more over it. Its out of your control. Meeting another nice lady would be great for ya right about now. Who knows you might even run across that special someone right here on mylots:) Have a great night
@artistry (4151)
• United States
20 Dec 09
....Hi d_e_v81, These are the things one goes through when our emotions go out and get wrapped around someone who may not be available to us. What to do? Cry youreyeballs out, look at yourself in the mirror and wonder, what the heck am I doing? We all go through it, some of us get closer than you have only to have our bubbles burst with a split up not of our own doing. Try that one on for size, then your heart is really split in two. Then there's abother wayto look at it you didn't really know this girl, you have no idea if when you gotto know her you would have like her as much as you fantised you did, that's whatit was a fantasy, so make yourself believe that you wouldnot have liked her if you really knew her. Fix it that way. Destroy the fantasy! Take care.
Forgive the spacing problem, my computer is acting up.
@Janey1966 (24170)
• Carlisle, England
19 Dec 09
It will take a while but one day you will find someone BETTER and think to yourself, whatever did I see in her? It's true. Believe it.
@amandaauc (82)
• United States
19 Dec 09
Maybe you should call her and tell her how you feel. Even if she's not interested (if she ONLY dates guys who are her own race,) at least you will have a weight lifted off of your shoulders and that should make it easier to move on. Good luck!
