Badges on the sleeve to show the number of occupational "hits"  

Well then, I bestow upon you the Golden Wizzy Scissors award
I'm thinking gold scissors (pointing diagonally from left to right) with silver comb (diagonally right to left) on a background of.... well, you choose the colour & wear it with pride
To be fair, I'm not sure if being covered in bristles is better or worse than the possibilities I have fom my job....

Oh thank you Wizz..I accept the lovely scissors with pride and joy!

Oh I think either one could be worse than the other friend depending on who's hair it is !

And you yes a beautiful solid gold bedpan hahahha OMG you are killing me here Wizz!

Hmmm, let me see, smelly old bloke's hair versus nice little old lady's poo OR nice old lady's hair versus.....Gotta be honest, I saw it more as the "Golden Turd" award...
(good job this isn't a 'scratch'n'sniff' page )

Oh Gawd people would be dying wouldn't they Wizz if they had to do those jobs ..yes I remember in beauty school the worst..no one could have prepared me for what I was about to encounter including little elderly women peeing on the chair oh Gawd..and elderly gentlemans nails as thick as fossils LOL

All the Vietnamese girls would not do any pedicures I had to do them all..

I AM just dying of laughter here. I could have several "Wheels on the Bus" awards, and then little scrolls of the "mini mental" exams I had to get. Cornell Mini Mentals or Geriatric index of depression or something or other elses. I cannot remember all of the psychological tests I had to administer when I worked as a Social Services Designee. You know, my hubby could not get accepted into a memory loss study for a clinical trial because he knew all the right answers to the Mini Mental.

Hhaha GG!

Designee..that looks like desineee..you know design-eeee hahhaha

Oh dear how mental is that! Me too dying now here..I will go to bed laughing tonight..thanks GG for another greeeaaaat laugh too!

We get a day of Mandatory Corporate training.... thats more than enough for me - tho' I'm told I can do that online now

Would that denotethe number of calls made/answered?

Oh, yes, and the number of minutes I was on the call and the average time I was on a call. I think this is a great idea for a short or movie! Think of a bunch of characters walking around with those armbands! Or a television show. You think like a writer Wizzy! Start writing your story and pitch it to the networks!

Unfortunately, I think most people would say I think like something else starting with "w" and ending with "er"
Having said that, there's an awful lot of crap that gets broadcast on TV & becomes popular!

I guess your would be a child on a keyboard then?

yeah, and badges per thousand or so... I'd probably have well over a thousand for "repeat visits" by kids

I'd have the "children" one from the time I worked in schools and a "form filling & telephone-answering" from a couple of years in an office. I'd really rather forget the waitressing experiences.

I forgot about waitressing. I would have baskets of corn chips and bowls of hot sauce!!! Actually I got very real badges, burns on the insides of my arms from carrying multiple plates of Mexican food warmed in a 500 degree oven. I could carry five at a time.

Wow... 5 at a time? I'm impressed. I remember tripping up a step & all the food flying up in the air... & by some miracle, all landing back on the plates!

I would pay to see that.

I did get a round of applause... so I gave a little bow as I regained my composure

Hmmmm, I suspect the grazes on your forehead would provide sufficient evidence to be classed as your 'badge'

Is your first trouble shooting question always "Is it plugged into the power source?" My nephew worked at a call center and had those kinds of calls.

... and "Have you tried switching it off and switching it on again?"...

I see the suit on the Paris catwalk...an alternative to camouflage - in fact, the catwalk itself could be strewn with pillocks.
Hmm, yes, being in the Pees Corp sounds far more prestigious than being permanently in the sh*t!!