how far one can maintain cordial relationship among family members
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
India
May 17, 2011 9:26pm CST
Hello everyone here Ji,
I wish to narrate my last night experience, our Son and DIL are both working , no one asks us to take care of their responsibilioties in their absence of the house. However , as and when we atre available we take their care religiously. Yesterday morning my hubby had gone alone for his both Eyes (Catract) check up and Specilist had advised him to go far surgery. At about 8 PM our DIL returned from her Office and gor busy staright away for cooking Dinner, so that She could serve by 9 PM (Our schedule time), She was almost ready but at the same time busy in attaending her call on cell. So I was trying to help, in between my hubby became furious and announced that he would take dinner after sometime. I just was blinking what had gone wrong. We are old and try to follow the basic norms in a family. I understood that our DIL did not wish after entering and never enquitred of our whhole day's alone life. When we a[pproached for dinner, there were some unwanted verbal exchange between us. After some time, when my hubby approached for Dinner, our DIL felt that She would take after pur Son'e return from office. Then my hubby refused. However, it got settled down when our DIl served and we finished our dinner peacefully. I would like to ask each and every member here, does this type of things happen commonly wityh anyone else hetre. Was it Unique ? . Also who went wrong where. There could be worst, if no one ghad taken dinner. What should be remedial and cautions for future. Please share your views on this. Thanks.
May God bless You and have a great time.
1 person likes this
3 responses
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
19 May 11
Hello my friend SIMPLYD Ji,
So nice of you for your immediate and prompt positive response. WEll following few factors might have played their part :-
(1) He was under bpressure taht as DIL knew about hospital programme, She would have enquitred about outcome from hospital, which he was not asked.
(2) Being left alone at home when SON and DIL both are away for work, it becomes curteous need from both that they should have asked our welfare and security/safety of the hoiuse including of our grand son who was left behind. At least a smiling 'GOOD EVENING' would have made everything Ok.
(3) Also, we Indians are expected to be smiling while serving food on table, it is not like soldier's duty at the battle-field, wghreeas DIl kept talking on cell. There should be proper decorum to be maintained at dinning table. Every thing was missing.
There could be few motre, best known to my hubby.
Thanks.
May God bless You and have a great time.
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
4 Mar 12
Hello my friend zandi458 Ji,
Well, first of all I wish to apolize with you and all my friends that I got hibernated due to many reasons. Let me see if I could be regular here-after. Well, I always want to stick to timings and remain sincere to life style living, which is going out of gerar with all new young ones, causing drastic problems to health. No time for food/sleep and all other natures call. I also appriciate, if someone has done forstly his/her primary duty and then shared some from others.
May God bless You and have a great
@SIMPLYD (90717)
• Philippines
19 May 11
I can now totally get the picture.
Your daughter in law might have cooked the food and served it, but was unsmiling in doing it.
But maybe as parents-in-law, you both should have been considerate too, that your DIL has worked for the whole day already and is already tired. She has cooked the dinner despite having worked the whole day, so somebody could have helped her serve the food. That way, she may not feel so much burdened and tired that despite her having worked all day, no one is trying to help her in serving what she has cooked. It would be better that everybody should have participation in the household chores, specially at night, when your DIL is already tired herself from working all day.
1 person likes this
@KrauseHome (36445)
• United States
23 Sep 11
Personally I would think things like this are common. Especially if someone is expecting their meal at a certain time and is made to wait. I know I have many Medical problems myself due to being Diabetic etc. and I get quite frustrated sometimes when I am made to wait, and have felt like saying I am not hungry as well even if I know that is not Good for me.
1 person likes this
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
4 Mar 12
Hello my friend KrauseHome Ji,
Well, more than me, my hubby is strict about timings, if someone does not turn up in time, he would bnever wait and after finishing go to sleep. I know very well that this attitude is not aggreable in society. But I can not help. He does.
May God bless You and have a great
@OpinionatedLady (5965)
• United States
18 May 11
I think the more family members in a home the more likely there will be days when one or more are just feeling touchy. A slight rudeness (yes she was rude) can seem much bigger of a deal when a bad day (needing surgery) comes around. As long as it is not the norm I would take it for what it was a bad moment like everyone has here and there.
1 person likes this
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
19 May 11
Hello my friend OpinionatedLady Ji,
So nice of you for your immediate and prompt positive response . With regards to more members in a family, I would say that we Indians lived in a joint family system and on the record there are two Joint families, where 169 and 119 members food is cokked twice a day in one Kitchen. So idea of more numbers in any family creating such scenes is out of order. Buty i think after coming back from Office DIL should have at least wished and asked about whole day affairs. Elders under the circumstances feel themselves neglected and frustated, afterall whole day they take care of the house, else theu should bother about safety and security of the house including small children left behind, it should be considered house instead of hotel. A familyu should be boiund by each other. I feel that belongingness is vanishing day by day. Thanks.
May God bless You and have a great time.
