And I Shall Get Back To You As Soon As Possible...

@pyewacket (44032)
United States
May 24, 2008 5:25pm CST
Okay a rant here...LOL Those words "And I Shall Get Back To You As Soon As Possible" are part of my message that I have on my answering machine...and I have those words for a reason...it means I shall get back to you as soon as possible...is that any clearer??....what else do I have to say to make it hit home? Now I'm NOT much of a phone person, but I'm not exactly a recluse either...for important phone calls that I DO need to make, I make. If someone is trying to contact me and has left a message on my machine while I'm out, and I really do need to call back right away, I will. No problema. Ah but then there is my pesky friend...like duh? It's like hey, I am speaking English here right...Now that I do have my own computer, I confess I'm just not as accessible as I once was...in other words I don't have the "luxury" of yakking on the phone to my friends all the time, and this one particular friend of mine out in Calif likes to talk a minimum of three, yes three hours! she actually left a message on my machine once..."I know you're busy, busy busy, but you can't be THAT busy." Huh? Oh, yup I am. For instance just these past few weeks, I've been doing a writing article marathon it seems...just to make enough money to "survive" the rest of the month...Then I'm trying to crank out more articles since I figured out my bills and crap, I need x-amount of money more just to pay them...so I HAVE to write these articles, unless I want either my phone or electricity cut off. So anyway, she called me and left a message on the machine the day after Mother's Day...yes I was home but in the middle of work....then she calls the following week on Sunday...yes, I was home again...but again in the middle of work...she just called me NOW...and yes home again, but again in the middle of work. If there was anything dire or some catastrophe came into my life then yes I'd let her know if there was something wrong and would have called her. (Oh, and am STILL trying to get a settlement about that IRS check that I've previously discussed about, so might hear next month??) She too gets disability benefits like I do, but now since she's on section-8 living expenses doesn't have to pay that much rent now...so when I do talk to her, she's telling me she bought this or that, while I'm knocking myself out trying to earn more money just for living expenses...sheesh. Then what also got me ticked off...we have a mutual friend...this person still lives down the block from me, and I remember asking my Calif friend if she calls Vi a lot...she said "No, I hardly ever call her since I know Vi is always busy." Like duh again?? AND I'M NOT??? Yes, I do plan to call her...she IS a good friend of mine and do value her..but like sheesh...am I wrong to be pissed off? I'm working my friggin butt off to make extra money, while she spends most of her time yakking on the phone, watching TV or reading her favorite autobiographies of people... So am I wrong to be pissed off, especially when I AM trying to work to get more money? Do any of you folks have people that just don't get the hint no matter how many times you've told them something.. I Shall get back to you as soon as possible!!!!!!!! Capisce???
12 people like this
16 responses
@cjgrooms (4456)
• United States
24 May 08
Maybe if you just bluntly explained to her that you have to EARN your living and can't waste 3hrs. gabbing on the phone. She might relize that if she just called and talked for 10 or 15min. you wouldn't put off getting in touch. It's worth a shot and if it dosen't work you can just go back to ignoring the call until you have time to waste.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
24 May 08
That's just it...I have been blunt and told her how busy I really am..not in a rude way or to hurt her feelings, but yes I have told her...she just doesn't seem to be listening.
3 people like this
@cjgrooms (4456)
• United States
24 May 08
I didn't mean to be rude or hurt her feelings since she is a friend. Maybe if you handled it with humor it would get through to her. Try sending her an egg timer with a card that says for "our next call" something like that.
3 people like this
@GardenGerty (115732)
• United States
25 May 08
Oh, I like the egg time idea. I do not know if it would work or not, but I do like it. You are correct in thinking that humor is useful.
2 people like this
@Rosekitty (19396)
• San Marcos, Texas
25 May 08
Pye Pye Pye! Sorry i can't talk right now I'm busy and will get back to you soon..I'm rereading a funny email i sent you..LOL.. I don't want to be you with a pesky friend like that..boy do i understand..what part of I'll get back to you don't people understand..I have a friend that calls me and asks have you heard yet?..so i politely say.."I'll call you when i do" for the umpteenth time..geesh
2 people like this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
Bonjour, comment allez-vous? Hi there I cannot come to the phone right now. Please leave your name and phone number and a very brief message, and I shall get back to you as soon as possible. Merci beaucoup. Au revoir....hehee That's my full message...thought I'd add a slight French twist to it on my machine. So you're friend asks..have you heard yet? My friend is usually always telling me all these jokes..ones that I've heard her tell me a million times..the real killer is that she thinks the jokes are hilarious while I don't...hmm maybe I should tell her that chili thing you sent me...now THAT'S Funny!
@faith210 (11233)
• Philippines
25 May 08
Hi pyewacket! Gosh, you have just said it exactly the way I feel regarding my "inlaw". She knows that I am really doing so many things just to earn some extra cash to help hubby in our meager income nowadays but she keeps on asking me to do this and do that for her, then will have to entertain her by listening to her yakking for she is bored with her life. Hello! She knows we are in financial crisis and she is not because she has a lot of funds to splurge for herself. And then all she yakked about is how life is getting hard and that she is so much blessed because she does not have any problems at all and then will go right on talking about the negative things she see on other people. aargh! I am always thinking of how I can be able to pay our bills and put food on the table and all she talked about is her blessed life and the ugly side of other people. Talk about inconsiderate people! Now, I am ranting too! haha.. Take Care and God Bless! Happy Mylotting!
2 people like this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
Glad to see you ranting here too! I think that is the problem with my friend too...she one, just really doesn't have anything to occupy her time with, so two, is probably bored. The real irony, sometimes when I do have some spare time I will call my friend..but then you know what happens? The phone is busy...LOL..So I give up after calling a few times and it's still busy cause then I have a cut off point where I just don't make any more calls and get back to my work
@gabs8513 (48710)
• United Kingdom
24 May 08
Well some People just can not understand or they have to be a Pain in the Butt lol I step back lol unless I get worried about a Friend then I will ring again after a few Days to make sure that they are ok, even if it is just sending them a Message from my Mobile to make sure they are ok that is all I do not have Friends that go on like that we agree that we will call back as soon as it is more convenient
2 people like this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
It's funny you mention about "more convenient"--when she leaves a message, she always says, "Well call me when it's convenient"...well maybe she should realize the reason I haven't called her back yet, as it's just not convenient for me yet...I do want to give her quality time to really sit down and talk with her, but not when I have it in my head my article deadlines, or deadlines for photo submissions I need to do..IF something really dire was wrong with me...then I would call to let her know.
@blackbriar (9080)
• United States
29 May 08
hmmmmmmmm...if your Cali friend is so insistent on talking to you, tell her to get a computer and a mic and talk that way while you work. I do that alot if someone wants to talk to me. I can be mylotting and talking to a friend at the same time. I broke down and put one of those headsets on layaway at Kmart a few years ago. I love it cause now I can hear my friends talk w/o turning the volume way up.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
29 May 08
Well even if she just plain got a computer I could at least email her at least...I don't even think she knows how to work a computer at all, otherwise she could at least go to a library and use those computers, the way I did before I got mine. mmm...don't think the chat/mic thing would work for me though...while I can multi-task I think I would find it a distraction to try to talk to someone and do my work at the computer at the same time, besides....Pyewacket has been very busy telling me his story that I'm writing...hehe
• United States
30 May 08
I thought about that after the fact. I can't even talk and type at the same time w/o typing what I'm talking about. lol The library is a great place to hop online long as you don't need to do anything private. I enjoyed my times at the library when I had to shut my phone off for bout a year. Met some wonderful ppl while using the computers. Your right, thou. If you friend was able to learn enough to email, you guys could of emailed each other back and forth. Next best thing to talking on phone.
1 person likes this
@ellie333 (21018)
25 May 08
I bet you feel better now that you have got that one out eh! I have two friends that I will put off calling simply because I can never get off the phone once on. I will say I have to go now and twenty minutes later they are still on the phone. I have been known to ring the door bell in the end and say 'gotta go, bye' just to get off the phone. I like you will not answer the phone if I am busy so they will try the mobile, my mobile is for emegencies only so when I don't answer they will text. I will then look to see if it is an emergency and if not call back when it is convienent. If I am in the middle of cooking the tea what is the point. I am always a listening ear if there is a real problem but just to go over and over something I have already spoken to them about anyway because they are bored irritates me. When I worked from home and my mum lived in the country she was the worlds worse for popping in for a cuppa and a chat and my exhusband also would call and ask me to do such and such as I was at home. YES I WAS AT HOME BUT I WAS WORKING I WAS IN THE OFFICE and I wouldn't be able to go to the dry cleaners or make mum a cuppa if I was out of the home at an office working for someone else. I really don't think these people do it intentionally its just they have no idea what it is like to be self-employed and working from home. So in a nutshell no you are not wrong in being P*ssed off. Ellie :D
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
Yup--that's exactly like my friend...she wants to talk, and talk, and talk...and usually the same crap over and over again. That's a good one. I'll have to remember that...to purposely ring my doorbell to make out someone's at the door...hehee. Just why is it, when a person works at home, people don't think you're working?? They wouldn't call a person while at work if they were an office, would they?
1 person likes this
@ellie333 (21018)
25 May 08
I know if you were out at an office they would only call in an emergency to disturb not to chat over some trivial. Ellie :D
1 person likes this
• United States
25 May 08
that's exactly why i shut the ringer off. busy means busy.i have friends that seem to have spidey sense when i'm trying to get mom ready for the day,or cooking dinner.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
My friend also seems to forget due to the time difference that I might be getting ready to eat dinner...don't ask how many times she calls me then...I just don't answer
1 person likes this
• United States
26 May 08
i can kind of excuse time difference (one incidence per),but the ones who do it to me are east coast (no excuse).that goes under just being butts LOL
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42681)
• United States
25 May 08
oh yes I have a neice that calls for some little old thing and sometimes in the middle of something I dont answer the phone. Now she thinks I am on vacation for it took me to the next day to call back and I got her mom which was ok. But seems like all we talk bout is how unwell she is I know she is in 70s but she isnt active any more she now weighs 240 dont get out of her chair much or house just enough to go to the Docs. this goes on for an hour . when neice calls she tells me they are fighting again hey I am 1800 miles away what can I do. We do have our people dont we lol
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
That must be real downer conversation having someone constantly talk about how unwell they are....sheesh, and then to listen to your niece complaining that she and her mother are fighting...like heavens, what are you supposed to do 1800 miles away?? Yup, we sure do have our people to put up with
@Lakota12 (42681)
• United States
26 May 08
sometimes I jst hate to take the call and wait till the next morning thats sometimes when I know they are in hospital or things like that I take call right away
1 person likes this
@wickedangel (1636)
• Dominican Republic
25 May 08
Oh pyewacket I think we all have someone like this and you just can't get through to them. The only thing I would do is ring her back and leave a message on her answer machine when I know that she is going to be out! That way you have done your duty as a friend, contacted her but not able to talk to her.... I had a friend like that. She used to talk and talk and talk, for literally hours. I would have to say 'I've got to go to the bathroom so we need to finish now' and her response was 'OK, and another thing...' or the worse one was 'that's OK I'll hang on!' One friend used to ring me up at all hours. He was living in Singapore and had girlfriend trouble and he considered me his 'big' sister. Sometimes we would be on the phone for at least an hour at 2, 3 or 4am. Now that IS annoying because you will never not answer a ringing phone in the early hours of the morning just in case it is an emergency.... Good one! I hate it when I get calls from these 'friends' because I feel so guilty for not talking to them and then feel mad with them for making me feel angry towards them and for them not listening. Yeah, definitely know what you are going through!
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
That's reminds me of another person I know and she's not even a very close friend of mine. It's fortunate that I do have an answering machine and I leave it on 24/7 so it serves as caller ID, so I know who is calling. I do have a few close friends that if they call very late like after 1 in the morning I'll answer, but even they have the courtesy not to call so late. Well this one person called around 1:30 a.m., and I'm like WTF??? Like I said if she really was a good friend no problem, but this happened when I just met the person...What I have to laugh about this friend I'm initially talking about in this discussion is this...by the time I do have a free moment or two to call her I can't...there's that 3 hour time difference from here in NY to her out in Calif...I once did call her (my time 12 midnight) her time was 9...well, my goodness she was annoyed with me..I didn't know it at the time..I tend to think 9 in the evening isn't so late...well, that's the time she goes to bed....sheesh-hey maybe to annoy her...I should call her when she's in bed...LOL
1 person likes this
• Dominican Republic
26 May 08
Oh dear me, she really does sound like she is a little 'difficult'. Well, I suppose ringing at 8.30pm would be good then! That way you will be cutting the phone call to 30 mins! Tee hee. It is such a shame that these people just don't realise that we love 'em but they can be such a PAIN. You don't need to talk more than 30mins and even that is more than enough thank you, especially if I'm paying for the phone call...:)
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (115732)
• United States
25 May 08
I did when I was younger, but not anymore, and I do not miss the ones that called me so much. I have a few I miss right now that are busy, busy, busy just like me.I think your friend needs to be hooked on myLot then she could do something productive with her three hours.I tend to prefer e-mail anymore, over phone messages. Good luck on your money hunt. I may ask for some advice soon.
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
Mmmm...she's actually one of the few people in the world that doesn't have a computer..that's the real bummer about it...if she had, then I could at least rattle off an email to her--I've gotten so spoiled with emails now that yes, I prefer doing emails over talking on the phone too
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (115732)
• United States
25 May 08
I feel less likely to interrupt people when I e-mail them. That is one reason I like them so well.
1 person likes this
@KrisNY (7591)
• United States
28 May 08
lol... Some people just don't get it! You would think that when you don't call her right back she would get the idea-- if she didn't want to talk for hours I'm sure you would call her back! I always call people back usually that day or the next.... I just it short if need be :) I do have friends like that- well 1 to be honest.... I work my butt off for everything I have--- they pretty much get a lot of things handed to them--- and they always want to go out and do something that is expensive- I get sick of it!
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
29 May 08
That's the real irony...there HAVE been a few times I've called her and she says, oh, I can't talk to you right now, I'm expecting an important phone call and hangs up..like duh? If I were to do that she'd get annoyed at me....LOL...sheesh I wrote a letter to her telling her how really incredibly busy I am...I sure wish she had a computer..she doesn't..so I can't email her--I think within another week, I can let up on my work a bit, then talk to her on the phone, but just really can't right now.
@Thoroughrob (11748)
• United States
27 May 08
I would pick up the phone, call her, tell her that you have gotten her calls. You are really busy, cannot talk right now, but will call her for a long chat soon. I am sure she is wondering if you are ok, orif she did something to upset you. Tell her you will get back to her when you can, and that you are just letting her know that you recieved her calls and will call as soon as you are able to.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
28 May 08
I actually wrote a letter to her since she doesn't have a computer and can't email her, which would be so much more convenient..LOL...Nope..there's no such thing as a short phone call with her though..ever try to get off the phone with someone who just wants to yak, and yak, and yak? I mean you could tell the person, oh, gee, I think the building is on fire, and she still want to yak...LOL
@meme0907 (3481)
• United States
26 May 08
Hey pw, I feel your pain about struggling financially & your friend is having it a little smoother so she can't understand-my BFF/Sister just had a shower for her first grandchild but I couldn't attend #1 I'm broke #2 I was scheduled to work-she understood but I feel like a real heel b/c I can't be as involved as when we were both making good money-I don't think your wrong to be aggravated maybe you could just spill the beans to your friend about whats up w/ you-sometimes it's not the words you say it's how you say them. I hope this works out for you b/c I know how much it hurts to lose a friend. +'s :)
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
28 May 08
No, of course not, I wouldn't want to lose her as a friend as we have been through a lot together and shared a lot of things between each other, but she really does need to realize that especially at this moment, and for at least another week, I'm going to be real busy. Since she doesn't have a computer I wrote a short letter to her and mailed it...nothing nasty or anything but told her I haven't disappeared from the face of the earth, and that I'm all right..I told her how really incredible busy I am right now though...hope that works
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164232)
• Garden Grove, California
25 May 08
I get you so whats not to understand huh.Nope you do have a right to be upset. Your friend evidently has no concept of how you might just be very busy as she has so much lesisure time to waste herself.Some people just have extra thick skulls or just plain are so wrapped up in their own thing they do not realize most people have lives and live them. I used tohave a sister who was just like that and she would drive me bananas too.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
The problem is, as I see it most times the woman is just plain bored...I mean she really doesn't have much going on in her life to keep her active except yak on the phone...that's her real big thing...Too bad she doesn't have a computer, yup, one of the few people that doesn't have one, but if she did I could at least email her.
@mommyboo (13197)
• United States
25 May 08
As soon as possible is open to interpretation =) I know you probably didn't want to hear this but if I say 'asap' to somebody, they may have a completely different idea than I do when I say it. Some people ... well, I just don't WANT to call them back. I have something else to do that is just more important. Also, it works both ways. People who phone me and just hang up, or leave some unintelligible message on my phone detailing neither who they are, whom they expected to speak with, or what they want aren't likely to get a call back from me 'asap' because I don't know who they are, they have not given me a reason to care, and - they probably didn't leave a phone number either. People who matter to me and are important in my life generally have my cell number and have a couple options there. If they cannot reach me at home, they can call me on the cell. They can also text me there or message me on IM, or send me email, the options are endless. Sometimes I will talk with somebody on the phone or chat with them while I am also doing something else. That's what multiple windows on the computer are for, headsets for the phone, etc etc. It does depend how labor intensive my projects are though. Usually I have enough focus to multitask sufficiently, so I can say... respond here or browse other sites and still have a nice conversation with somebody in real time.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
Mmm...I could never talk on the phone and do computer work at the same time...LOL...especially if I'm writing my articles as I need my full attention there. My friend doesn't have a computer so I can't even email her to let her know I haven't disappeared from the face of the earth. Also it isn't like I don't want to call her back, I do...but right now I'm really hauling a$$ trying to earn as much money as possible to pay all my bills next month, and that takes top priority. I once did tell her off a bit about how busy I sometimes am, but yikes she just doesn't get it..I guess some people don't, do they?
@anniepa (27280)
• United States
25 May 08
NO, Pye, I don't think you're wrong at all to be p1ssed off! Some people don't listen at all, whether it's to the message on an answering machine or voice mail or when they're actually talking to someone, and I think your friend is one of those people. I think what would make me the most PO'ed would be when she said how she knows your mutual friend is so busy! I know just what you mean about someone liking to yack on the phone for hours and I know there are some people that you can try and try to "get rid of them" for literally hours but they just keep on talking. I've been known to be a bit long-winded on the phone now and then, when I haven't talked to someone for a long time and if I'm not busy AND if I'm in the right mood but if someone tells me they have to hang up I take them to mean they have to hang up - what a SHOCK! I like the idea about the egg-timer. Here's another idea - tell her at the very start of the conversation that you have only 10 minutes (or however long you have to waste on the phone) and that you've placed a device on your phone that will automatically disconnect you when the preset timer goes off so she shouldn't be offended that you've hung up on her. Then if she doesn't say her goodbyes and let you go in a reasonable time after you first TELL her you have to go, just hang up! Maybe she'll get the hint. Or you could invite her to join myLot and let her read about herself here...lol! Annie
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (44032)
• United States
25 May 08
Well my friend is probably one of the few people in the world that doesn't have a computer, otherwise I could at least rattle off an email to her while I'm working in front of the computer. And writing letters by snail mail would take to long for her to get, but hey, I just might write one tonight and mail off. I mean you think she would get the hint...if something really dire did happen to me, I'd be calling her up to let her know about it. I think her main problem is that she's just plain bored and doesn't have much to do with her time. Oh, and yes, I noticed this about her...on occasion when I DO call her she'll cut me off saying she's waiting for an important phone call or something like that, but if I try to cut her off short...forget it. She'll still yak on. I like the suggestion too, another poster said here...she purposely rings her front doorbell to make it seem someone is at the door...hehe. My phone is right near the door so she couldn't help but hear it...think I'll do that..LOL