can you talk anything and everything with your partner?
@kenchiprincess (5296)
Philippines
December 5, 2008 1:41am CST
me and boyfriend are like two people who looks crazy together. we tend to talk and talk about anything and everything around us. when we just got started more than a year ago we is really seriously and now he had opened up himself a lot. i can't just imagine being with someone who rarely talk and would keep his feelings or thoughts to himself. this is one of the things that i appreciate from boyfriend a lot him being able to open up himself and i enjoy every moment we are together. how about you can you talk anything to your partner without any inhibitions? or would you rather keep somethings to yourself thinking he or she would like it?
1 person likes this
29 responses
@ButterflyBear (39)
• United States
5 Dec 08
Although I would like to and that is the way it should be, sadly I cannot talk about everything and anything with my spouse because there are certain topics that he turns around into such ugly things which have absolutely no truth to them at all.
1 person likes this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
5 Dec 08
That's terrible that he jumps to the wrong conclusions too often. Does it make you fearful?
I can't see a relationship lasting and being truly happy without both partners being honest with each other.
My husband has often jumped to the wrong conclusions about things. We have argued about many things that he has assumed incorrectly. But I would rather argue than try and remember some lie.
My feeling is that you can never truly be wrong for telling the truth. It is a big thing for me.
I would be very upset with my spouse if he was lying to me just because he wanted to avoid arguing.
In fact, I left my first spouse because he was a pathological liar. And our daughter had the same tendencies and lied to me so often while she was growing up, that our relationship is still damaged. Simply because I cannot trust her. She says now that she only lied because she was afraid of getting in trouble. But I don't care. If you do something wrong, it will ALWAYS catch up with you. When in the end, the lies end up causing you more trouble than if you had just told the truth in the first place and taken the sh1t, gotten over it and put it behind you.
1 person likes this
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
6 Dec 08
i agree with you that in every relationship honesty and open communication is a must. thanks for the post.
1 person likes this
@ButterflyBear (39)
• United States
8 Dec 08
It is very sad that he jumps to the wrong conclusions. It just goes to show though what insecurity can do to a person. I personally cannot help but feel though that the insecurity as well as the accusations that have no truth to them is all because of their own guilt of things they have done wrong. You ask does it make me fearful. Fearful of what? I am not fearful of him if that is what you mean. If I am fearful it is only of the feelings that it causes me to feel. Or, should I say lack of feelings.
@Nhey16 (2518)
• Philippines
5 Dec 08
I used to talked to him about anything under the sun... but due to a lot of circumstances that had happened within us for the past 12 years, now, before I talk to him about anything, I would have to think first of how he would react and if it's really necessary for him to know what I'm supposed to tell him.
It's so weird to know that, the longer we've been together, the more I'm not telling him a lot of things... I don't know if its just me, or if there are also married people of more that 10 years, who are like this...
1 person likes this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
5 Dec 08
I know how you feel. My spouse and I have been together for 15 years. I am always honest and I believe he is, too. BUT.......now that I know how he will react about some stuff, I hesitate sometimes to reveal things that I do not have to. I won't lie, mind you, I just can't. But there are some things that he just takes the wrong way, so I try to think of ways to tell him so he won't get upset.
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
6 Dec 08
thanks for sharing. how you can work this out too with your spouse. have a great weekend!!!
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
5 Dec 08
indeed it is sad to know that. maybe we can read on the post of some other married couples here if they experience the same thing. would it help if you and your husband talk about it? thanks for the post and i wish you the best.
@Crysi23 (515)
• United States
7 Dec 08
My husband and I can talk about anything and everything to each other. We don't keep anything from each other. We believe in honesty and trust to make our marriage work along with communication. Without communication honesty and trust we know we wouldn't have much of a relationship and it would fall apart. Plus all relationships take work.
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
8 Dec 08
that good to know. indeed honesty and trust go together and it makes the relationship more stronger. happy mylotting!!!
@sassygirlanne007 (4517)
• United States
5 Dec 08
I am very lucky to have a wonderful man in my life and he makes me feel as though I can tell him anything.
1 person likes this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
5 Dec 08
Me and my husband have been together for 15 yrs. We are both, I believe, honest with each other, even if it is bad news.
Personally, I can't live any other way. I can't lie. It just doesn't work for me. Every time I have ever tried in my life (I can count the number of times on 1 hand), it hasn't worked, so why bother trying. I actually resent other people that are able to lie and get away with it. It just isn't fair.
My husband said that he had lied in previous relationships and ultimately it was the downfall of the relationship. Nobody likes being lied to. So all is well, until they find out, then they won't forgive you nor ever trust you again. So, he said, that with me, he would rather get in trouble for whatever he does wrong, right away and get it over with, than to lie and ruin the whole relationship over it.
I also made it quite clear to him when we got together how important being honest is to me. So we made a pact, to always be honest to each other and tell no lies.
1 person likes this
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
6 Dec 08
i totally agree with you. honesty and trust are some of the strong foundation of a relationship but how can you truly trust someone who haven't been honest with you. have a great weekend.
@Bebs08 (10681)
• United States
8 Dec 08
well, for me yes, I talk to my partner about things specially major ones but if things are just minor and not of much importance, I will not share it with him specially if he is in too much stress with work and other things, I will not bother him telling things that are not so necessary for him to know. Well, your BF and you have good relationship when you can open anything and w=everything to him. But it also doesn't mean that if people are not sharing everything, they are not in good relationship. Things, differ in situations too. Good luck.
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
8 Dec 08
thanks for bringing that up my friend. we have to respect also that others are quite secretive in certain stuff that they want to keep it on their selves. enjoy the night!!! happy mylotting!!!
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
5 Dec 08
yeah that's true there are some things left better not said than to hurt the person you love. as what they say, ignorance won't hurt him or her. thanks for the post!!!
@messageme (2821)
• United States
8 Dec 08
Im confused on this response. Is it things you have done you don't want to tell him because it will hurt him? If so why would you do those things or is it the past before him? just curious, trying to learn.
1 person likes this
@fit4lifein07 (719)
• United States
9 Dec 08
I would rather say it all we tell each other everything, I think that is why we are so close and have been together for almost 9 years!
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
9 Dec 08
open communication in a relationship matters a lot. thanks for the post. happy mylotting!!!
@gtdonna (1738)
•
7 Dec 08
Oh yes! I always said that my partner should be not only my soul mate and lover but also my best friend. I would feel funny if I can't be open and discuss anything with my partner. To me that says he has secrets and hiding things from me if he shys away from certain conversations.
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
8 Dec 08
that's great that you have found someone like your partner. it is not everyone who have this kind of relationship with the person they love. hope you keep that kind of relationship. wishing you all the best. thanks for the post and happy mylotting!!!
@kenjinakamura (39)
• Philippines
7 Dec 08
good for you for having a kind of bf you have others have hard times to open up like you do. enjoy the relationship that you have now and hope you end being husband and wife. GOD BLESS!
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
7 Dec 08
thanks for the post. i hope so too with God's grace we will. have a great day!!!
@messageme (2821)
• United States
8 Dec 08
I tell my man everything! My thoughts, my feelings, everything! I feel if you are with someone you are comfortable with you should have no problem telling them anything. I have been with guys in the past that were not very open at all. They wouldn't tell me anything unless I asked and even then they might not tell me. To me that means they are trying to hide something. In my cases they were. I have finally found someone that is very open and will share lots with me and I am very thankful for that.
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
8 Dec 08
i perfectly agree with what you have said. thanks for sharing your thoughts. have a great day!!!
@hapie_angel (129)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 08
i will share everythin wif my partner ..
tis cn improve de relationship yea ..
if u luv some1 , definately u wil share everythin wif dem ..
but sometym i wil leave trouble n sadness 2 myself ..
cz i dn wn him 2 worry for me ..
@Suzette265 (51)
• Philippines
6 Dec 08
Yes, it's better to be open in everything so that you'll know what is on your partner's mind. Being open means being true to one another. If you can talk anything and everything with your partner, you will know what to do to make your partner as happy as "happy birthday" hehehehehe
@NikkiLuvsAlex (319)
• United States
6 Dec 08
I can talk about most things with my partner. We talk about many different topics and even discuss very personal and sometimes even embarrassing things with each other. Sometimes though I do prefer to keep things to myself, but he usually convinces to me to get it off my chest.
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
7 Dec 08
it is nice to know that your partner encourages you to speak up on those topics that you choose to keep for yourself. be thankful that you have an open communication with him and he does too with you, not everyone got that opportunity. happy mylotting!!!
@sonawanes04 (5)
• India
6 Dec 08
dear, no matter how you are tuning with you life partner but practically there seems to be a void in some aspects and you can't help it....
@LuvBr0wn13s (765)
• United States
5 Dec 08
You are very fortunate that you can talk with your partner about anything. I hope that does not change. There are a lot of things that I cannot talk to my husband about, so thankfully I have some great friends. He is a good man and loves me very much, but he just can't be everything to me.
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
6 Dec 08
i am hoping for it too that the way we communicate would not change. it's good to know that you have your friends that you can share with things that you can't share with your husband. have a great day!!!
@shalybhe29 (162)
• Philippines
7 Dec 08
We're already on a 4 years and counting relationship. . . Even when we started being together. . its really important for us to talk and talk and talk. . about everything that we want to share from school, work or even the acquaintances we had when we're not together.Sharing everything with your partner builds trust and makes you stronger,because you will learn from there the capacity of each other in situations you may encounter.
@kenchiprincess (5296)
• Philippines
7 Dec 08
great to hear that. indeed being honest and open with your significant other builds trust keep on doing this. thanks for the post and happy mylotting.
@littlevv29 (20)
•
5 Dec 08
i think i can say yes we can talk to each other about anything. i havent come across anything we couldnt talk about. he seems to talk to me about anything he needs to talk about and i tell him anything we have a pretty good open relationship i believe. its pretty good
