is ther a such thing as to much time with a person?

United States
March 24, 2009 2:17pm CST
A friend of my wife, told her one day that she and I spent to much time togather, And although we did spend every day of our lives with each other I never found myself being tired of her company. She said that it because we were still in the new love stage, but its been 3years from that day and I still havent grown tierd of my wifes company. So my question is is there realy such a thing as to much time with a single person, and if so can it be a bad thing. Personaly I don't think it is simply because, you never know when that person can be taken from you by the powers above, So I think that we should get in all the time we can....WEIGH IN
4 people like this
19 responses
• India
24 Mar 09
Hey take that as a compliment. Spending too much time with your wife is a great thing. You should be very happy for yourself. I think her friend is just jealous or maybe she wants to spend some time with your wife and your wife might not be giving her that much time and always spending most of her time with you. Thats why the question maybe... What say ??? And as for your question, I'll agree with you buddy, there's nothing like "spending TOO much time". You love each other, you spend time with each other. Thats that... Happy mylotting buddy...
2 people like this
@Canellita (12056)
• United States
24 Mar 09
How much time a couple spends together can only be determined by them. Unless your wife was complaining about your relationship or her current there was no justifiable reason for this friend to say that to her. As long as your marriage is healthy and you have appropriate friendships outside of the marriage and you spend time with family members you should be able to spend all the time you want with your wife and be grateful for every moment. Some people work so much that they never get to see each other. This friend of your wife is more than likely jealous of the situation the two of you have together. This is not the kind of comment a loving and supportive friend would make. Again, as long as your wife is happy and as long as your relationship is healthy it is no one else's business how much time you spend together.
2 people like this
• Philippines
24 Mar 09
Hello there Torion, you are right, we will never know when will be the time if God would be taking our loved one from us or else our own life. There will never be such as over time with the person you love specially your spouse. For me it is much more important to know your spouse very well than your friends. And i guess that spending time with husband nor wife is ok and has nothing to cause us harm. In fact, our relationship with our spouse will grow even deeper and it will be an advantage for us. I have never heard anyone told me that i have spent much time for my hubby. Because we can only be together during off days and when he goes back from work. So i suggest that if there is time, then spend most of it with the person you love and always make it special. Happy Mylotting!
@wahmivy (778)
• Philippines
25 Mar 09
The general rule is that too much togetherness can cause friction, so many people make sure that they put in some space to keep things healthy. Then again, there are always exceptions to a rule and you and your wife seem to be part of the exception for this rule. Also, "too much time" can be pretty subjective. You may be spending a reasonable amount of time together, but some people may find it too much. You and your wife are the best judge of whether the two of you are spending too much time together.
1 person likes this
@lynnemg (4536)
• United States
25 Mar 09
I do think that there is such thing as too much time with time with one person. I think that even the happiest and closest of couples need to take a little time to do things that they enjoy individually. That just allows time to miss each other and be yourself once in a while. I know a couple that felt that they didn't need or want any time apart and did everything together. They always seemed so happy to be together. Then one day, they weren't. She said that she felt "closed in" and "smothered". I never talked to him about it, so I can't say exactly how he felt. I do know that once they started doing things individually once in a while they really did thrive and grow as a couple. They have now been together for 12 years, and are still going strong. You don't necessarily have to spend a lot f time apart, but I do think it is good to do once in a while.
1 person likes this
@maeras (115)
• United Arab Emirates
24 Mar 09
Hi! Spending time with the person you love is a good thing. I admire you both for the sincere affection you share for each other for over 3 years. If your friend told it to your wife good-naturedly, then I guess you should take it positively. Just mind though that maybe she may be saying that because she saw something that might not be right anymore, given that she is really being a good friend. Like for example you are spending too much time with other that you might be neglecting some responsibilities. Try to evaluate what she meant. If you see no harm, then carry on..do what makes you happy.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Mar 09
I guess pre-maritally, there is such a thing as clinginess, but this woman is your wife, and you and her made vows to each other during your wedding. Those vows differ, but basically, you promise to commit yourself to her as she does to you. A man and woman who get married may be apart from each other for short periods of time, but if she's your wife, then there's no such thing as spending too much time with her. Basically, she's yours, and you are hers. Most people need time for "friend time," but if you and your wife don't, then I congratulate you on finding such a strong love. Keep your wife close, and don't be offended by her friend's comment unless you and your wife talk about it.
1 person likes this
24 Mar 09
AWWWWWW!!! :) Well I Used to be with my boyfriend all the time, that I even started living with him and his parents for few months. Alot of people started saying we shouldn't be spending that much time together especially because we are only teenagers. We never hanged out with our friends out of college. Hmmm, I suppose that's the only bad thing, You may start becoming less close to your friends because of spending so much time with your partner.
1 person likes this
@chookie1971 (2275)
• Australia
24 Mar 09
I personally think that it does depend on the couple. You have shown signs that both you and your wife really compliment each other. You really enjoy each other's company. You would be sharing interests. She shows interest in you and you show interest in her. While you both have this, there is no such thing as spending to much time with each other. My relationship is different to yours. When I talked about showing interest in each other. My husband doesn't do that with me. I show interest in him, but I don't feel that he shows interest in me. He wants to spend time with me to do things he wants to do, but he won't spend time with me to do things I would like to do. Even with talking, he will talk about things he likes to talk about, but when I talk to him, he isn't interested in what I am say or if I have an idea, he shoots it down. Here is an example of what I am talking about. I approached him to about our child going to a birthday party. I was describing the parents of the birthday girl. My husband turns around and tells me, 'do I need to know this?' I replied by saying 'yes, I think you need to know because these are the people who could be looking after our child for the time of the party.' Some thing like this shows that he isn't interested. With this, I need space to get away from the self centered feeling I get from him. So when my husband is on holidays, I feel that we are spending too much time together. When he stops being self centered, I will enjoy my time with him and would be happy to spend every minute with him. My situation is not too bad because when we do things that we both like it is fantastic but I knew of a couple who spent 24/7 together. They would do nothing but argue all the time. When he got a job, there was less arguements but she wanted to spend every minute of her life with him which means that he couldn't keep a job as he would give in to her demands. With no money coming in, they couldn't afford to pay the bills. Now this couple was spending too much time together. So have shown here that each couple can be different. As long as you and your wife are happy together in each others company, then I would say go for it. You deserve it and so does your wife. Enjoy the times together and value them. Don't let any one tell you any different.
@kayens (19)
• India
24 Mar 09
Lucky are those who are made for each other and better lucky are those who make them for each other. One can make one's own destiny.Only thing needed is sincere eforts and perseverance.I suggest you start considering your husbad's interests as your interests and then the day will not be for away when he starts thinking your interests as his interests
26 Mar 09
listen as long as you are both happy with it why should you worry, you both know what works for you mgraham126
@tschu8 (136)
• United States
25 Mar 09
There is nothing wrong with spending time with your wife. There is no thing as too much time with your wife. When you two married you became one. Your lives are one now and I think that anyone who thinks that this is "too much time" just has not found the right person in their lives. I spend alot of time with my husband and love every minute of our time together. We can be together day and night and sometimes we work together so we are together 24 hours a day and I have never tired of being around him or felt that I needed a break. And I know that 20 years from now it will still be the same. Enjoy your time together. Someday your wifes friend will find someone that she cares enough for and will understand the true meaning of being with the one you love.
@sid556 (30989)
• United States
25 Mar 09
I think it is awesome that you still love spending time with your wife after 3 years! And you are smart in realizing that our time is limited and we just never know when someone we love will be taken from us. We should never take the people we love for granted because you really just never know. In the case of your wife's friend....maybe she is just one of those people that need more space or time on her own. I am like that. I just really need my own space and if I don't get it, well..it isn't good for the relationship. I NEED that time. If you and your wife are happy then I would not pay attention to her friends advice.
• China
25 Mar 09
my bf and i spend every day together since we fall in love with each other,maybe, just like you and your wife .we love each other very much and our love never fade out with the time passing by.so i don't think it's a bad thing to spend much time with a single person ,of course, you have to make sure that you are in love,and she is the right one in your life. Best wishes and may happiness be with you!
@PrarieStyle (2488)
• United States
25 Mar 09
It sounds like you have a rare gift. You're wife's friend might be jealous and should maybe mid her business. All that matters is that it works for the two of you. You must truly love each other and work toward loving and helping each other every day.
@Wizzywig (7858)
25 Mar 09
Obviously, it depends on the feelings of both parties within that couple and how similar their interests are. Whilst I appreciate your point that a person can be taken from us at any time, I feel that it is important (to me anyway) to be an independent person in my own right - to be able to do things/go places and generally 'cope' on my own in preparation for that possibility. So, for me, yes there is definitely such a thing as too much time with a person but, that's just my feelings. I wish you many more happy and contented years together
@akari11 (82)
• Philippines
25 Mar 09
It's true love, you enjoy her company and love spending time with her. You are very lucky to meet your soulmate.
@zhuhuifen46 (3485)
• China
25 Mar 09
As long as one has his own career, and social activities, he can get good balance between work and family. Only those who are short of normal outside job or activities might cause too slight burden on his or her spouse. Unless one party feels like it, nobody could say anything as too much or not. Especially in first years after marriage, the close intimacy is natural, but have to get prepared with time passes by, there might be changes, which is equally natural. Then you will have to use your wisdom to balanced and upgraded in the relationship.
@kayens (19)
• India
24 Mar 09
It is good that tht you always enjoy the company of your wife. Man, it is not bad rather you both are blessed. Keep it up. You both should utilise your togetherness to thinking of new and better ways of fulfilling your life. To your wife' friends, her response should be that they should also try and taste it.
@celticeagle (123448)
• Boise, Idaho
24 Mar 09
I don't think people can spend too much time together. That is so very silly. I think one of the problems in the world today is that we don't spend enough time with loved ones. After mom and dad are gone what then? Sad feelings because you didn't spend enough time? Our kids grow up so fast. Couples grow apart and get divorced. Get in all the time you can and I would highly question the reasons behind the remark made by your wives friend. Friend? Jealous maybe?