Not speaking to my daughter anymore, but is that wrong?

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I have 3 daughters and 1 son. My oldest and youngest daughters live down here in Florida with me but my middle daughter, who is 27 years old, still lives up north. She has been living with her boyfriend and his family for a little over 3 years now and they have, for the most part, had a good relationship. They've had their ups and downs but Theo understands Melissa, who has ADHD, and until recently she told me that she loved him. That has now changed. I suspected that something was going to go wrong when she started to hang around with a new friend, Christy. Christy lives with her mom who, according to my daughter, is "cool". She drinks and there seems to be a lot of people at that house at all times...a real party atmosphere. Melissa and Theo both have jobs and there were times when he would go out with his buddies and leave Melissa at home which is when she started to hang out with this girl. Last week Melissa started to complain about Theo...to complain about old history, fights that happened several years to one year ago. She also told me that someone had told her that Theo was cheating on her. I could feel her pulling away from this relationship and more towards this "party family" and I asked her if she had any evidence of cheating and why she was digging up these old bones of long past fights. She had no answers for me. Three nights ago she called me crying, telling me that she had left Theo and was on her way to Christy's where she could rent a room from the Party Mom. I asked her what had happened and she told me that she had started an argument about the old past history stuff...things that they had long since worked through. I told her that she was making a mistake but she kept telling me that she was "Done." Today Theo called me...in tears and completely heartbroken. Anyone who knows a 28 year old young man knows how hard it is to cry in front of anyone, much less someone's mother who you barely know, but that's how upset and hurt he was. Melissa won't answer the phone when he calls and won't return his calls even though he leaves her messages. I felt so bad for him...my heart broke. So, I called her. It was 12:30 in the afternoon and she told me that she just got up. I didn't even ask her if she was supposed to work today but I believe she was. I told her about Theo's call and asked her to call him and to talk to him. I told her that he really loved her and that she was being cruel. Her repeated response to me was "I'm done, Mom.". I tried to talk some sense into her but the longer I was on the phone, and the more I heard people laughing and having a good time in the background, the angrier I got. Yankee, if you're reading this by any chance, you know me and you know my kids. I did not raise them to be unkind, to intentionally hurt someone or to treat someone who loves them like garbage. I reminded Melissa of this and got the same "I'm done" from her again. Her "so what" attitude got the better of me and so I told her that if she was going to be so nasty and cold to Theo then I didn't want to talk to her anymore. She was righteous at first until she realized that I was serious. You want to end a relationship...for whatever reason, even a bad one...you have the decency to talk to the person you're leaving and give them some answers and some closure. You have the decency to care that you have hurt them and do whatever you can to ease their pain. You don't simply walk away and treat them like they don't exist. Nothing I said got through to her so I told her not to call me again and I hung up. A few minutes later my phone rang and it was my son...she called him because her older sister was at work. I told him what was going on and he agreed that his sister is being a putz. Since I was on the road at the time and losing my signal I ended the call and turned my phone off. I'm so angry and I can still hear Theo crying in my head. He's a nice young man and he treated my daughter well 99% of the time. His family treated her like their own, loaning her a vehicle when she had problems with her car, having birthday parties for her and being the family she missed since her two sisters and I are 1,000 miles away. It hurts a lot for me to take this stand...I'm used to hearing from her at least 2 or 3 times every day but, in reality, she hasn't called much since she's been involved with these people. My husband always says "family first" but he's been (wisely) keeping his mouth closed about this. I raised my daughter better...I raised all of them to be considerate and kind and I just can't stand by and watch this without saying or doing something. So, to make this rant into a discussion...am I wrong? Should I stand by my daughter regardless of what she does or how she treats others or should I stick to my principles? I really don't like cruel people so how can I be chatty right now with someone who is suddenly as cold as ice to someone who did nothing to deserve it? And, yes, I do know from my daughter's own lips that Theo has done nothing wrong lately.