Sorry, I'm not taking new friends at mylot. Why? Read on.

Well,I should say I can understand what you said . Maybe I can't express all my feeling exactly here cause my English is not so good but I still want to say something.I don't like to add friends here at first ,and the reason is just like you said .I thought the friends here are just the person who respond to your topic and then you give a response to their's.But these days my feeling is changed ,it may because I find some true friends here and we do have some common interestings and we make pleasant chat here.I am addicted to this feeling and get a lot of joy here.So I feel sorry when I read your post.Anyway,I do wish you can enjoy yourself here .

I do take new friends and some have been quite productive, but I do agree. I have rejected the same few people like 6 or 10 times. I have looked at their profiles and don't see anything in common, and I have looked at their discussions and don't care for them. I have, in fact, totally stopped accepting young males from India because they seem to be totally here to talk about cricket, making money and Bollywood - not necessarily in that order....

I understand where you are coming from, but I am still continuing to accept friends. What may happen though, is now that I can sort my friends, I may go through and delete the one question wonders that I have not heard from in three years. I have perhaps turned down a handful, and then I had one spamming pest that I deleted and he kept re requesting until I left him pending for several months. I think he left the Lot. This may be a good day to clean house, and I will not tell you how many pages of friends I have.

I partially agree with you! And I am going to state my reasons. If you accept friendship only with people you have something in common, they you are confined to remain in the same space, not being exposed to different situations, beliefs, cultures and traditions. I do belief that being exposed to different things do enrich our life. I do agree with you that sometimes people add you and then they never ever bother to reply to anyone of your discussions. From my personal experience here. I always try to answer to my friend's discussion. I cannot say that I reply to each of everyone's discussions since I am not knowledgeable in all subjects or not all discussion are that interesting for me. For example I have a particular user in mind, this mylotter replies to some of discussions (even though this person hardly agrees with whatever I say). That's fine as long as we respect each other (And we really do!) On my part i try to participate in this person's discussion and avoid those which are alien to me such as politics. I don't pretend that all my friends participate in my discussions but I do see your point, why having a long list of friends when they never bother to participate in yoru disucssion.

That's understandable, and I have noticed that too. I wonder why, then I think maybe I posted one discussion that I normally don't talk about and it interested them, so they requested me. I think I did that too, in the beginning..

I accept everybody who asks, but the 'real' friends are the ones who not only stop on by my discussions, but also share something about themselves and we connect somehow.

In the beginning I accepted everyone, now I am more selective. Like you said your friends list gets unmanageable, plus lots of them just request you because they want to have lots of friends on their list. I would rather have just a few on my list that I have stuff in common with. Every now and then I will do some housecleaning and delete some.

hey i agree with you. people that only have one or two discussions under their belt is not good enough for me either.

I have many friends here but I still approve those who requested. People come and go here and those friends in my list is a mixture of old and new. Some may have even left long time ago but still sitting in my list. I think it is time for me to delete those who have not been seen around. I have a circle of real friends here who bring cheers to my discussions as they never fail to support my discussions and these are the people that I consider my great friends. Those who come in sporadically may not have much time to be in mylot but I do still regard them as friends.

may very well be a great idea there. ive thought of it myself just havent gotten around to it yet. the whole thing is, i just dont answer all my friends discussions. just the ones that respond to mine. i do a discussion and as soon as someone responds, i answer their response, then go pick one of theirs to respond to. thats how ive always worked it ever since i figured that many my friends do not respond. im a scratch my back, i'll scratch yours kinda gal

Hi writersedge~ I agree with you partially. But, I am guilty of having trouble denying friend requests, so I also have pages of "friends" too. I have also finally started to look at profiles and really trying to see if there is something that me and the person might have in common. I am basically a responder. I don't start many discussions, as my friends know! So, when I do start one, I expect my friends to "show up" even if it is one of my "crazy ones"! But, I still enjoy meeting new people and have added quite a few lately since many of the members that I've known have left and I was feeling like I needed some new people to respond too!

Now this seems like a good idea. It is actually rude as i face the same thing. But, i am considering deleting some of my ''friends''. Rude, no. Just honest. TATA.

Maybe this is the start of a friendship you like.

Well i think its just a matter of choice, whether you will accept one as a friend or not. I believe in mylot people who wants to have a connection about your discussions or topics are reffered to by the system as friends/ affiliates/ members and so on.But doesnt mean they are your real friends.I accept everybody who wants to be a friend of mine in mylot, just like you when your still new here, im just a newbie too 2 weeks old still trying to get along with most people, try to as much as i can comment on what i think i can share something .Im just glad that im able to learn alot from this site, like how people think, even if sometimes their opinion is the opposite of mine

I see where you are coming from. I don't really add friends any more I just wait until someone adds me. But I agree that it's better if you are friends with someonen that has something in common with you. I have a lot of friends but there are some in there who are not even active anymore so I guess they don't count anymore. About those notifications, I don't really like those notifications because they are constantly clogging up my email address and it's getting me frustrated. Those notifications are too much for me becaue they just constantly clogg up my email and I don't want to delete something important one of these days. But yeah to get back to the topic It's been a while since I've added someone as a friend just because they have something in common with me but I've had a few people add me as friends. I guess some people just add whoever just so that they can have a whole bunch of friends.

Hiya, I quite understand why you decided to make that your system of accepting, rejecting or ignoring the possibility of new friendships in this site. There are just those people who have a pattern in terms of their responses and their newly created discussions. I do agree that being friends with someone here in myLot could translate to exchanging ideas in discussions. Being online friends outside of myLot could be a possibility once the myLot friendship has grown. Keeping things in perspective, I do try to be that kind of friend. I can say that I was but the past few months had me busy with offline priorities which gave me little or no time to be with myLot. I am swamped with myLot notifications from friends started discussions that I havent managed to respond to yet. but I go over them little by little.^_^ With this situation, I still accept all and any friend request that I get and I do turn their notifications on. However, I cannot guarantee that I would be able to respond to them right away. I may be a few days or months late but if Im really interested in the topic, my response will find its way to their discussions, eventually. I dont think that we have had the opportunity of being actual myLot friends but I have seen you a lot around the Lot. I believe I may have responded to some of your discussions but again I have not been consistent with that. Goodluck for those who wish to be your myLot friend and to you for evaluating their intentions. May you have a great weekend!

I feel the same way you do. It seems alot of these newbies I have befriended want to send me spam emails and I delete them. I don't take any new freinds on that have very low numbers because this has been my experience. I guess if they show themselves to be good in discussions and such then I will befriend them then. I even go through and delete people I haven't seen on disscussions in a long time and especially if their profiles show they haven't been active.

Hello, Writersedge. I'm in full agreement with you there. 'Friend' means the same in any context - it's someone with whom you have shared interests and some connection. Too many people on here are friend collectors. I'm also very cereful who I approve as friends, because I want to spend my time on here interacting with my friends, not wading through lists of discussions I have no interest in.

yes it can get very madding when there is so much i know i have around 400 e-mails a day and it takes the day to get thought all of them just delete the ones that you haven't heard from in a while that help alittle

Hi, WriterSedge. It's your choice who you will accept as your friend and who you would not accept. I love accepting friends requests - I don't think that I could deny someone just because he/she didn't posted in 2,5 or 10 of my discussions. BTW I have a friend from MyLot who never answered in my discussions, but we are chatting and we have fun. But it's all your choice - if you think you don't need that much 'friends' in your list and you wish to have just real friends, than you just deny the requests you receive.