When Trying To Get Help From People
By Daddy Neil
@neildc (17238)
Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
August 9, 2010 9:31am CST
[i]To all who follows my son's health condition, you may have know already how I turned myself into a cyber beggar. And to those who may not know, my 3 year old son has Obstructive Adenotonsillar Hypotrophy, a condition where the patient is stop breathing while asleep. In short, obstructive sleep apnea caused by large tonsils and adenoids. He has to undergo Adenotonsillectomy to remove his tonsils and adenoids. That we need a lot of money.
[/i]
So I started begging money online. I do it on few websites that I joined.
So far, we have gathered small amount from relatives, friends and even unknown people who turned to be friends. They love helping people. They love to see my son sleep normal.
Now I just found out some small things.
There are relatives that even if you know they have no lots of money, they will try to save few of their incomes to help you. But there are those that you know who are really rich, but very skeptical. You can't get a clue if they will really help you.
There are friends that since the start of our problem, they never leave you. They are always there to support, not only morally but financially.
And one of the best, the most touching. There are those that you really never know, but without any questions, send their help. Prayers, moral support, spreading the news to find more help and their hard earned money.
Could you share some of your experiences when you need to seek help from others?
Have you experienced some of kind of those I have mentioned?
1 person likes this
17 responses
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
9 Aug 10
hello neil,
What can i say?
I did my best,but i guess my best wasn't good enough.
I've tried reaching out some friends whom i know (with so much hope)who could share some of their blessings,yet i never had any positive result.
I am happy for my friends who responded without questioning about zay2's situation.
How i wish some mylotters will respond too,don't ever lost hope dear brother
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
9 Aug 10
hi jane. of course sister, we have faith. and we are not losing hope. i know you did your best. i know how you also want to hear and see zayzay sleep normally. btw, honey sent me a message earlier telling me that she just sent her share. she's actually one that i have mentioned, who are not friends. and another lawyer-friend of my co-employee also pledged. tomorrow, i also expect some more to come from one cousin of mine. SsD.
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
9 Aug 10
i guess that's the right word to use for my other relatives, the rich ones, dismay 
@jaiho2009 (39140)
• Philippines
9 Aug 10
That's good to hear at least i am given more hope not to give up too.
Just felt a bit dismay (really sad),anyway,i believed that there are more people who had a big heart than those i expected
@celticeagle (189838)
• Boise, Idaho
10 Aug 10
I found that a very small percentage of people really want to help and do. The other, larger percentage, are fake and will tell you things to your face that they don't really feel or expect to really do. You either understand this and are able to cope with this truth or you wonder around wondering what happened.
@grecychunny26 (9482)
• Philippines
10 Aug 10
I admire you for doing that! You are a great father.I was trying to help you, however I understand that the help I was giving can only burn you out. I am happy to know that there are people who help you financially, I believe although it is just a minimal amount or little amount, it is appreciated by your family. Have you ever visited your City Hall and ask for the help of your Councilor or Mayor? My sister did not went to PSCO, but she went to Caritas Manila instead and ask for some medicine for my father. 10 tablets each, I am thankful for that.
However about the question, I was needing a money before this is about my mother ,she needs medication. I was seeking money and advice however, i did not received any help from anyone. Maybe God helped me because after a week she gave me a additional job that I got additional earnings. I got that job in an accident. I can't explain how hurt I was that no one will try to helped me. They will just listen and they will say they will pray for me, but do you really believe they will pray for you? I just pray for myself. No one can ever help me but myself itself.
How they continue to help you, and when I say I will pray for your son's situation I will definitely do it. Try to attend Novena too every Wednesday in Baclaran. God helps those who are truly in need, and God strength is shared to every one who ask for it with all honestly.
@grecychunny26 (9482)
• Philippines
11 Aug 10
Good attitude! that is what your family needs now, for you to be a father that has the positive thinking. I wish I have that thinking. I am always in the panic and I do not want too. i started my novena early this morning in Baclaran and that includes your son.
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
hi friend. i appreciate the kind of help you have tried to give us. but definitely, this time, that kind of system will not work well for our situation. i have been to that site, as i have said.
i wanted to go to pcso or pagcor or even in the city hall to seek help. but...
pcso requires a few documents from us which will only be available once we are already confined or is about to discharge.
pagcor said, we have to have some recommendations from a certain agency or a person. that will be my next step.
the city hall officials are not that approachable though i have not tried yet. aside from that, their jobs have almost just started. so i suppose, they still have to familiarize their new jobs, including the new mayor.
i have sent a letter request to Caritas Manila. good thing they responded but unfortunately, they only give help to the poor people in Manila. there is no way they extend financial assistance to us.
almost weekly that i come with my wife to pray from the sto. niño de cebu, that's besides being me as non-catholic. i do believe in God and i pray to Him and give thanks.
i am not losing hope. help is coming. and good sleeps is coming to our son soon, very very soon.
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
10 Aug 10
I have not been in your situation and I am glad that there are some who are willing to help. The people who have a lot of money and appear sceptical are probably used to being approached for money by those who are less than honest. It is good to know that there are kind souls in the world who are willing to help no matter what! I hope you reach your goal soon neildc!
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
it's fine for us to be skeptical paula, but it's a different kind of feeling when they are relatives. thanks for the support, always.
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
and i am really glad sweetie for the outcome of my cyber begging.
though they come in small amount, i know later we will reach the target.
though they come in small amount, i know later we will reach the target.@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
yes sweetie, i just have the guts. but i cannot do this if not only for my son. 
@lindaharding627 (1442)
• United States
10 Aug 10
There is a site that I often go to when I need help that you can post wishes on. It is called wishuponahero.com. The people of this site have been very good to me and my family. They have helped with gas money, cards, gifts and even pullups. If you were to post there, you would have to join which is free and get your wish verified which is easy. All you do is submit proof of your address by uploading it to the site. This would allow you to be able to ask for donations for your son's health condition. This site even has wish advocates that try to find larger sponsors such as Walmart to help with bigger wishes. I hope this helps. I try to let others know of this site because there you can grant wishes or get wishes granted. Its such a wonderful site.
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
this seems to be a great one. i will try joining this site today. thanks for the information.
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
hi again. thank you once more for the information on wishuponahero. i have just joined the site and posted my first wish. i hope to see you there.
i really hope i will have a grant from this site. wish me luck.
@dorisday1971 (5657)
• Philippines
9 Aug 10
I am very sorry to hear what you are going through.
I have also experienced what you have experience about asking help from people who you thought would help but in the end are the first to say "no". Never mind them because there is God who always watch us.
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
and to those who never ask but helps, God will bring back the blessings to them.
@Hatley (163772)
• Garden Grove, California
10 Aug 10
neildc its so hard when you are in trouble like we were and broke,,my son out of work and our eviction because we could not keep paying the rent, our real friends took us into their own apartmen, sadly against the apt. complex rules, and let us stay in their living room sleeping on two couches until their manager started making noises, so we had to find shelter and we had a week in the Salvation ARmy Hospitality house. they were very kind but it was only a stop gap. so my son got in touch with a social worker who said he could get me put into a retirement center using my social security and ssI checks to pay the rent and board. it was not a perfect solution but when you are both broke it was the best for the time being.I owe Drew the social worker who brou ght me here at the least a big hug as I am 84 with a bad leg and diabetes so being on the street and homeless was not very good for me. it split up my littlefamily but now at last my son has a job so maybe later on we can once more live in our own apartment. We had a lot of help andsome were so giving, to jeopardize their own rent our best friends went out on a limb for us. they know we are ever eternally grateful for their love.
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
i understand your situation hatley. i also pray that one day, your son will be able to get back the apartment for you to be together again in one roof.
that's right, most of the time, we can rely more on friends and unknown friends than relatives.
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
9 Aug 10
Hi Neil,
I have a brother is well off but never give you a penny if you need it and the rest of the family would never go to ask him because we know what he is like but my mother who has passed would always give even if she have to stave, she would give her last penny, I would love to help you but I am unable to so all I can send you is prayers healing and love for the liitle boy and keep you all in my thoughts, hugs.
Tamara
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
hi tamara. i also know some people who is like your brother and also people who is like your mom. my mom was also like your mom. prayers do help a lot too for us, tamara. thanks.
@savypat (20216)
• United States
9 Aug 10
I have always found help from unexpected corners. And I give many prayers and thanks for it. I am sending you all the support that I can in the way of prayers.
I wish I was in a place where I could send money, but I can't
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
yes, it's more frequent that help comes from unexpected people rather than people who you really know well. it's ok pat if you could help. prayers do also help a lot.
@sumanadep (1228)
• India
9 Aug 10
I have not faced any such situation yet so I don't know about this... But yes there has been few people who need help and their relative who are wealthy but didn't help them.. the help that they got was form some unexpected person or say not a well know person...
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
we can't help but to feel dismayed with those kinds of relatives but we get touched with unexpected help from unexpected people.
@tomitomi (5429)
• Singapore
9 Aug 10
I'm glad to hear that there are money coming in for your son neil. The thing I applaud most about you is your enthusiasm and perseverance. Those are positive signs.
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
i will keep this way for the sake of my son. we really really want to see him sleep normally.
@2004cqui (2812)
• United States
10 Aug 10
You must know my uncle! The one that brags about how much money hes got.
When my mom, his sister went to assisted living I was the only one who could sell her house. She spend all of her money and never had the well sealed. The house went to pot and the job was left to me. When I told him of my problem he just went away. Now all he does is brag about how much money he has. SHUT UP UNCLE!
@PDBME2 (1014)
• United States
9 Aug 10
We're not a rich family and my husband is the only one working to support our five kids. Anyhow we know this couple that is not rich but sometimes comes to ask for money. We are skeptical in lending anything out because whatever we do have we need it back on the day they say. Well they have always proven to give us back our money whereas people who do have money just shine it on. I wonder what they would say if they knew that those people who are poor payback money better than the ones who have. At one time we lend so much money out that my husband was upset. It took some people over a year to give us back any money. I give thanks to God that we ended up getting most of it back except for one family. They lost their home only because the peoople who lived with them got greedy. They were receiving money but just got greedy. One night they moved out because their house was going under foreclosure.
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
10 Aug 10
i myself also wants to help people who come to us for help. but we are also not rich and most of the time, we have less of what we need. even how eager we want to help. but the rich people whom i know, mostly relatives, are some that really dismays us. how my family love them but when it comes to money matters, they are very skeptical.
@carolscash (9491)
• United States
10 Aug 10
I wish I could help but I am paying huge medical bills of my own right now. Try to have a bake sale to raise some money for your son. Ask a local store if you can set up a booth in front of the store to raise money. People always love to eat!
I am currently trying to help a friend get money raised for starting a petting zoo for autistic children. It seems so hard to get others to help with it.Good luck to you and your son!
@neildc (17238)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
9 Aug 10
sometimes friends out-perform what your relatives could do i agree.
