Is It Hard to say I LOVE YOU????
By bird123
@bird123 (10632)
United States
August 14, 2010 11:08pm CST
Who knows the reasons we have for not saying I LOVE YOU? Perhaps, it's no more than we haven't said it in so long that it feels funny. Unseen hurt can develop in us all when we avoid this. We all need to hear I LOVE YOU!! We all want to hear I LOVE YOU!! Even if you haven't said it for years, you can change. It's never too late to heal everyone around you.
Regardless of how funny it feels or how out of place you are, you can start slow. Start with a quick LOVEYA, as you walk out of the door. Hmmm?? That didn't hurt much yet it is a start on the road back.
Increase the number of LOVEYAS until one day, it doesn't seem strange. Try saying it and not leave the room. Remember, practice makes perfect. In time you can say I LOVE YOU!! As you do, step by step, you will get closer and closer until one day, you can look them in the eyes with all the feelings from the depth of your soul and say I LOVE YOU!! THERE IS NO LIFE WITHOUT YOU!! If you do this, I love you will become normal again. You might just discover that you start hearing I LOVE YOU BACK!!
5 people like this
31 responses
@traveling (87)
• China
15 Aug 10
I think if u often say I love you, some one may wonder "do you say the truth?" So practice makes perfect is not always useful. If i love someone ,it will be hard for me to say I love you. I love somebody but I don't say out.
@princejhaizee (279)
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
Yes...that's right. Not every one point is applicable in all side.
It is hard to say i love you because you are afraid to know what he/she will respond to you.
It is a matter of how we deal to that person.
1 person likes this
@tkonlinevn (6340)
• Vietnam
16 Aug 10
I don't think so. If you love any one, you should say that to him/her. Because, we don't know when we can leave them. I think that we shouldn't wait for loving or loved. Some people are not enough tender to know your love if you don't tell them. So, please say "I love you" with your partners, with your family members etc...I think when you say that not only your partner feel happy but also you, too.
1 person likes this
@srineeya (52)
• India
16 Aug 10
heloo friend,
love is not a vegetable or purchasable thinks. love is connecting two or more people. love is between father and son, or father and daughter or boy and girl etc.... so love is not only lovers ha ha ha. I LOVE YOU!! hearging that sentence is very beautiful one. its comes to us only way of loving only. it is not back to money or viloence ha ha ha ha
1 person likes this
@Tresaqwe (376)
• United States
15 Aug 10
Some people believe that saying I love you is too much of a commitment and you're afraid that the other person won't love you back, or that they don't particularly enjoy the idea of love. Others may be uncertain and don't want to say it if they are in love, so they don't want to say it and realize that what they said were untrue. Love is a very complicated thing.
1 person likes this
@ANIME123 (2466)
• United States
16 Aug 10
I don't know, but people have a tough time saying this because you know if one says I love you the other may say that they love them too, but only because they feel like they have to say it and doesn't want to hurt the others person feelings. Love is so complicated now a days, but people don't really say this because they fear rejection and they do not want to be rejected.
1 person likes this
@bird123 (10632)
• United States
16 Aug 10
Indeed, love is complicated. Love should be unconditional. That would tend to make one selfless. Reject me. I will love you anyway. I will be sure I leave no doubts that you know I love you!! Maybe love really isn't so complicated just the people are. Thanks for all your comments.
1 person likes this
@princejhaizee (279)
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
For me, I can't tell if saying "I love you is hard."
Because every one of us are different.
Suppose, there is a boy who love very much the girl. That boy is shy type person. in his situation, saying I love you is very hard. But if he is not a shy type or let say he is an "Over-Confident" man, he can say "I love You" without any difficulties.
But there are some instance that even though you are not shy, we came to a moment that it is really hard.
So why did it is hard to say I love You? For me, it is hard because, "I love you" is the feelings found in the very deep of our heart. This is not just an emotion but rather our self to someone.
Remember we are not saying "I love you" because we want someone, but rather we say it because it is you!!!
@princejhaizee (279)
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
"I love you not because of who you are, but because of who i am when i am with you."
1 person likes this
@totallyundecided (3190)
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
Here in Philippines, its kind of different because most in relationships often give their I love yous like how they are giving their hello's.
but I'd like to think of it that it would always depend on the person because I know there are some who are having a hard time saying this - either they are afraid of committing with that person or just not ready about anything else besides the present state of the relationship they are having.
@Reyachan (589)
• Romania
16 Aug 10
Hello :) I noticed this little conversation and i just had to say something. I noticed a lot of people around me saying those words just as you said...like hellos. But I think that doesn't cut it as the "I love you" that bird was talking about. In those cases i believe the words lost their power completely and their content is kind of void. They just say it to be said.
I liked the way you interpreted the lack of "real i love yous". I too believe that they refuse to say it because they are afraid to face their own feelings.
But what if they are afraid to do so because they feel inside that it's not the right person? Or what if they actually can't commit and that condition of theirs will last their whole lives? Can this be called "not being able to love"?
@totallyundecided (3190)
• Philippines
16 Aug 10
Hi, reya. I'm glad somehow that you have agreed to what I said. And yes you are right, I love you is a powerful word and it could change someone instantly. Some people just say it for the sake that hey need to say it and never meant it at all. Very sad but that's life. It's hard to find the real and genuine ones these days. :D
@dont_pick_your_nose (2279)
• Australia
17 Aug 10
Maybe before you know that the other person feels the same way, or if you are very young or inexperienced with relationships. But i think you should only be in a relationship if you are in love. it's something you can feel, and you think of 24/7 it's a feeling when you know it you will want to share it because the awkwardness is worth the overwhelming joy when you here the reply. "I love you too"
@sona22 (1430)
• India
15 Aug 10
It depends each other and person to person. I have in love with my husband from the first sight. We were eager to meet each other and we met and talked on various issues except love. But we fall in love and he proposes for marraiage and I agree. We have utterd the word "I live you" in a rare. We believe that just mouthing a word will not change the mind. Deep love is just feeling. By uttering we can not prove it.
@bird123 (10632)
• United States
15 Aug 10
You are right, however hearing those wonderful words from the one you love always feels good. If you and your husband don't say it very often, maybe you can get things started. What would he do if he started hearing it from you everyday??? THanks for all your comments!!
@Reyachan (589)
• Romania
15 Aug 10
Hello bird123...you struck a nerve with this discussion in my case. It happend in highschool..I started noticing a guy, he noticed me too, we chased each other around for about a year, neither having the courage to talk to the other. He was one year older and when he graduated i was really sorry i didn;t speak to him about it. But he came at my prom one year later...And we were together for 1 year and a few months.
He was my first love.He never told me that he loved me though i could feel it. When i confronted him about it, he said at 13 he loved a girl and she didn't respond to his feelings so he said he will never tell another soul those words. It hurt me a lot back then. I thought he was childish and immature.
We broke up several months later but kept in touch till this day. If something bad happens to me, he always calls me...like he knows something's wrong.He has never admitted his feelings to this day , but as i grew up I understood that the magic doesn't stand in those words as much as we love hearing them. It stands in actions, inhow the other looks at you and touches you, in how he/she speaks to you. So don't feel said about not hearing the words..If love is still there, it's all that matters.
PS : i don't want to interpret this in any way so i'll let you form your own opinion...but 2 years after we broke up, he managed to say "i love u" in a message to the one that was his girlfriend at that time...only he sent that first message to me ...by "mystake" :) So ..i don't consider it to be official :))
Happy myloting and lots of "i love yous" if they are that important to you!!
@bird123 (10632)
• United States
17 Aug 10
Life is about learning and growing as people. True love often centers around this. People can be stubborn. Sometimes they must hurt until it's easier to change. Communication is key in all relationships. If it were me and that much chemistry was there, I would confront him and make sure I SAID IT ALL!!! With all the cards on the table, it will become clear. Just this kind of interaction might force everyone to deal with things instead of dance around them. Love him enough to put it all out there regardless of the consequences.There will be no doubts. If it is true love, this will just make the bond stronger. So many times we need the confrontation of our opposite half. Everyone always tries to avoid drama but often this is where the learning is at. True love will never be all roses. If it were, it would be boring. Thanks again for all your comments and best wishes.
@Reyachan (589)
• Romania
16 Aug 10
Hello again, bird :) I don't know what to say about that though. Unless he takes serious action in my case and admits certain things, there is no chance for us. Yes, i do have a soft spot for him and i probably always have but it takes a lot more to have a good relationship. And somewhere along the line ..i started thinking that we might actually not be right for each other, despite our strong bond.
I'll keep you informed if things change though :) I always thought that things in life can always change and nothing is literally eternal.
happy myloting!
@czanwell_30 (717)
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
If you really love a person saying I love You is not hard. In my case, my husband and I always say that many times a day. It's like adding spice to the love you had for each other. In my point of view some may not say it maybe because they are not used to and maybe they are not showy. And the sad thing about it is that maybe this person who can't say those words doesn't really love his/her lover. :-)
@Ceekay1989 (323)
• United States
15 Aug 10
saying i love you to a significant other is a big step and you risk the chance of it not being returned. but its a big step, its not so hard to say it to a friend thats a mutual understanding for sure. but i think throwing around i love you's would just defeat the purpose of it and wear it out and it wouldn't have as much meaning because its used to often that it becomes expected there are otehr ways to turn the world into a more loving way without having to say i love you to everyone.
@myiesha (96)
• Singapore
15 Aug 10
It's good to hear "I love you" from someone who really cares.
Practice makes perfect, that's true but not when it comes to saying "I love you".
I think practicing makes you get used to saying it that it becomes a habit or routine, not because you feel like saying it.
As I've mentioned in another discussion, sometimes I don't say I love you because I don't feel like saying it at that moment. Instead of saying a lie, I just smile and try to make up for it.
@bird123 (10632)
• United States
15 Aug 10
Practice is for those who can't say it. Perhaps it would be a good thing to watch ourselves so we don't get into a habit of never saying it. We should express our love to those we love. It is something we should never neglect. We assume they will be around forever but that's not always the case. Thanks for all your comments!!
@charmaine36 (145)
• Jamaica
15 Aug 10
You are so right. Three little words that can make such a big difference. There's a certain comfort and a feeling of security that comes with knowing that you are loved. Oh yeah, it's a great feeling to love someone and be loved in return. Say the words. Of course action counts but saying the words out loud dispels any doubts.
@bird123 (10632)
• United States
15 Aug 10
I agree. Actions are important, however hearing I love you along with seeing it in their eyes dispels any doubts. Doubt is never a good thing where love is concerned. We can all so easily make it clear for those we love. Thanks for all your comments!!
@sweetloveforeve (13107)
• Portugal
15 Aug 10
yes you are right^^ people dont usually say i love you to each other. but those words are important to be said and listened also^^ about me when i have a bf i want him to say i love you to me always ahah i like to be cared much^^ also some people sometimes are unhappy bcs dont listen these words very often so they think that other person doesnt care enough for them. these words are the most important that we must say^^
@ptower76 (1616)
• United States
15 Aug 10
Saying "I Love You" is indeed food for the spirit for those that are truly in love. But those words can also ring hollow if loving actions are not displayed also. I mean, who wants to hear I love you from someone that acts completely opposite to the meaning of those words? Those that abuse their spouse have a funny habit of saying I Love You after the deed is done. I don't know if the abused spouse wants to hear that. Also, telling your parents I love you rings hollow if one does not follow with loving and considerate behavior to the parents. I thnk it is more important to practice loving behavior and the "I love you's" will fall into place.
@cjsalas (109)
• Philippines
15 Aug 10
Hmmmm... It's not hard to say I LOVE YOU. Believe me, it's not. It would surprise the person you talk to if they don't have any idea of different kinds of love. If you love your friend, say it as often as you can before it's too late - even to your family. Saying I love you is not strange, but to some it is. Hmmm yes, you are right bird - practice it to be confident in saying it. So that sincerity will be evident that what you are saying is genuine.
@bird123 (10632)
• United States
15 Aug 10
It's funny how things we don't do very often can become strange. We should never forget to do the important things in life. There can be no more important thing than sharing one's love for another. Genuine is right. Get up close. Let them see it in your eyes. Thanks for all your comments!!
@bird123 (10632)
• United States
15 Aug 10
Yes, I think stress levels across the world would drop in half. Yet, it is something so easily done. I hope those having trouble will read this discussion then slowly come back to where the joy and happiness lives. It is something we all have the power to create. Thanks for all your comments!!
