Who Says On-line Friends Don't Help Each Other Out In Dire Need?
By pyewacket
@pyewacket (43903)
United States
January 18, 2011 7:18pm CST
Last night there was a case of desperate seriousness on Facebook. I wouldn't have found out about it, save for having a friend on FB who was a friend of a particular person. While this person wasn't a friend of mine, I was still able to read her wall. Post after post were desperate cries for help and asking her friends to tell her why she should go on living...yes not only was this person depressive but contemplating suicide. Not only was I able to see her postings but her photo album and friends list. Her friends didn't know her real name as the name she had was a page for her cat. A bunch of us posted an alert on our walls including me, asking if anyone knew this woman, her true name and her exact location to get help to her. Then I backtracked and I did a bit of sleuthing and by looking at the person's photo album saw numerous pictures of an attractive young woman, then I looked at her friends list and connected the dots as sure enough I was able to find just who the woman was and her real name.
There was a lot of relaying between a lot of us...someone who lived fairly nearby in the area where the woman was called the RCMP (this was taking place in Canada)--someone else had the phone supposedly of the woman but turned out to be her sister, but now the sister was alerted. Bottom line, authorities were able to locate her and took the woman to the hospital for "observation" and is now being helped, averting what could have been a tragic ending.
So next time people think spending a lot of time on-line at a social networking site or even here is a waste of time, it isn't. I think many of us get genuinely concerned and help out our on-line friends in times of great need and in this case it helped saved a person's life.
Have any of you been involved in helping a person you know on-line out? Have they helped you out?
10 people like this
20 responses
@Kashmeresmycat (6369)
• United States
19 Jan 11
Good for you Pye! I bet it feels great to be part of a team that helped that poor woman out. There's probably a thousand other one's around too, and it would be awesome if everyone did what you did. Great job! Maybe you should have worked for the police department.
3 people like this
@Kashmeresmycat (6369)
• United States
19 Jan 11
Oh, that was horrible. How strange that all these people just followed suit and went in the same direction, without any compassion or caring. What the heck is wrong with people today, are they just followers with no minds of their own? So disgusting. And what's amazing, is the people you know on Facebook went in the total opposite direction of the other people. How scary it is to see how human nature follows different paths, in completely two different opposite directions, at the drop of a hat.
2 people like this
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
19 Jan 11
I just read the article and that stinks...
I can't believe her "friends" said those things and then not even make a comment when they found that she did kill herself..Obviously she didn't have any "real" friends, they were just gossipers...It is "friends" like that that make social networks look bad, but thank G♥d for you pye, what you did trumps their stupidity..
I can't believe her "friends" said those things and then not even make a comment when they found that she did kill herself..Obviously she didn't have any "real" friends, they were just gossipers...It is "friends" like that that make social networks look bad, but thank G♥d for you pye, what you did trumps their stupidity..2 people like this
@jerzgirl (9234)
• United States
19 Jan 11
Fantastic, Pye! That's how a social site should work! She needed help, she reached out and help was found! I did do that once for someone on my MySpace friend list who was talking about killing himself. Instead of trying to talk him out of it, the others on his list were telling him what a loser he was and that they hoped he'd hurry and get it done. He may have been doing it for attention, but I couldn't know, so I gathered as much info about him as possible (from his page, photos, info he'd posted, etc) and emailed it to the police department in his city after calling them and explaining why I wanted an email address. I don't know if his declarations were a hoax or not, but I know he's still alive and no longer making such claims. I've never told him I did that and he's never mentioned if anyone ever approached him about his claims to want to die and how he planned to do it.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (158187)
• United States
22 Jan 11
I feel fortunate to have the kind of friends who would rescue other people or animals from social connections. It is a very good thing.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
22 Jan 11
That was great you took positive action to help him, but how horrible that his other "friends" were telling him what a loser he was and that he should get it done and over with. In a sense those people could have been reported as cyber-bullies
@GardenGerty (158187)
• United States
19 Jan 11
I have only helped as far as to send books to friends and to meet some of them in person. Caring persons online will go out of their way, just like they do in the offline world. If I thought someone needed my help, though, I would put out some effort to make sure I got it to them. Glad this story turned out well.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
22 Jan 11
Speaking of books...I belong to the Wish Upon A Hero website...on-line people help each other out at this site. A person puts out a "wish" and if we can help out in anyway we do. One time a person was looking for the VHS tapes of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Well since I have the DVD versions there was no need to keep the tapes so sent them to the person. Another time someone was looking for a few books which I happen to have and sent those.
Yes I'm glad the story turned out well, her sister is keeping watch over her now and the woman is also getting therapy help.
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
19 Jan 11
Wow Pye, I am honored to be your friend here and on FB, what a great person you are to do this for someone..
I have been helped out a lot, from everything life throws out me, I know I can get help, whether here on mylot or on FB. As for if I helped anyone, maybe, maybe not, sometimes we don't know who we influence even online. Like it says in the movie "It's a Wonderful Life" We never know who we touch in our lives. (Not a direct quote, but close enough)
I have been helped out a lot, from everything life throws out me, I know I can get help, whether here on mylot or on FB. As for if I helped anyone, maybe, maybe not, sometimes we don't know who we influence even online. Like it says in the movie "It's a Wonderful Life" We never know who we touch in our lives. (Not a direct quote, but close enough)@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
19 Jan 11
It's funny you bring up "It's A Wonderful Life" since yes we never know how we touch each others lives--and in the case of on-line friends we rarely get to meet them in person, yet we can still help them in perhaps ways that are better than our real life friends
1 person likes this
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
19 Jan 11
I don't know why I brought it up, I haven't seen that movie in over a year, yet when George is shown how his life touched so many people in positive ways, your post reminded me of that. I didn't open the link you posted in Kash's thread, but read how a woman's friends made fun of her when she cried out for help, that is disgusting. I wonder how her friends feel now???
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
19 Jan 11
Hi Pye,
Thank goodness for networking, yes it does work, this lady was crying for help that is why she told he friend, I am so glad everyone managed to get help for her in the end, online are friends are just so wonderful.
Tamara
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
19 Jan 11
Yes on-line networking can be a virtual life saver...or if one is going through a rough time our on-line friends can give us words of encouragement...sometimes even better than our "real" life friends
1 person likes this
@sonusd (1547)
• India
19 Jan 11
I have got several help from my online friend,I was very week in English,I joined a Educational site and I got so many friend who helped me to learn so many things about Internet and HTML uses and so many other programs about computer also one of my friend who is staying abroad helped me to create a web site,he has designed a web site for me for free of cost which generally cost around $300 and he did it for me for free just the sake of friendship;.
I also have helped some time some friend to learn something regarding finance.and also give suggestion how to invest and where to invest
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
22 Jan 11
Yes it's great how on-line friends can help each other out. That was great of your friend to create a website and for free
@Thoroughrob (11742)
• United States
19 Jan 11
I am glad that people did care enough to find her some help. Even if it would have just been her sister, at least someone would have been alerted. I hope she gets out and has a better outlook on things. In these times, there are so many things happening that can send a person over the edge.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
19 Jan 11
I'm hoping the sister will keep an eye out and watch over this woman--I don't think she had a clue how bad her own sister was
@whiteheather39 (24403)
• United States
19 Jan 11
That is a really good example of what an online intervention can achieve. Saving a life what a great thing to do.
I did help one of our myLot friends last year in a personal situation which turned out well considering she is in the UK and I am here in the USA.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
19 Jan 11
Yes most of this woman's friends were/are here in the US while she was in Canada, yet she was still able to get help in time by a lot of rather frantic networking
@anniepa (27955)
• United States
22 Jan 11
No, I can't say I've ever had the opportunity to help a friend out online in this kind of way but bless you, Pye, and thank goodness there are people like you in this world - not to mention in cyberspace - who are willing to take the time and go to the "trouble" of trying to help someone in need. I have to say, there are lots of people and animals who are fortunate to have you as a friend!
Annie
1 person likes this
@ElicBxn (63252)
• United States
19 Jan 11
before I had been here a year, one of my friends found a kitten outside her place...
It was freezing cold, and she took him in, but she couldn't keep him because of the rental agreement, so she said she was going to go to Walmart the next day and find a new home for him...
Honestly, I thought, that's probably how he ended up outside in the first place, and, seeing she was in San Antonio, an hour from Austin, I PMed her and told her I would come down the next day and get the kitten.
We named him Tony, he's a very sweet boy, but he STILL doesn't like the cold!
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
19 Jan 11
Aww--Tony is gorgeous. I helped someone here one time relocate a cat some time ago because my friend was moving and couldn't take the cat ...remember the cat Sassy? I even had done discussions for help in finding a home for her...took a lot of networking but it was done, despite me being in NY, my friend in GA, then someone else in NC
1 person likes this
@BarBaraPrz (45821)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
19 Jan 11
Good job there, Detective Pye.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
19 Jan 11
Thanks BarBaraPrz...LOL yes maybe I should have been a detective
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
5 Feb 11
Some people want to believe that we're just a bunch of fictious fools believing everything everybody says and that we can all be what ever we want to be. Now part of that is true however, once we get to know one another over a period of time, we all really do make some really good friends in different places of the net and around the world. I have recieved help from a few friends when I was having such a hard time making it and when things got better, I've helped a few friends by the saying "Pay it forward" and asked that they too do the same because I don't want to be paid back. I feel it'll come back triple fold but that's not the reason I do what I do. I do it because it's the RIGHT thing to do.
@joyceshookery (2057)
• United States
20 Jan 11
Amazing! I'm glad to see that real connections are happening -- and because of people like you reaching out and putting forth the effort, I feel this woman got another opportunity to say "yes" to life. She didn't want to die and fortunately, didn't reach an empty cyberspace. Thank goodness for people who care!
@celticeagle (160877)
• Boise, Idaho
20 Jan 11
I have helped several and those on Mylot as well. Friends made on Mylot and FB and that needed more than just answering a discussion. It seems not to be enough sometimes. We all seem to have compassion in us and are ready and able to help but sometimes more is needed. And FB is great for that. More one on one. It is great we have these interlocking sites.
@LittleMel (8742)
• Canada
19 Jan 11
well I got help by many online friends
so anybody saying that must be a toad in a hole
@TheCatLady (4691)
• Israel
19 Jan 11
A lot of people use their pets names on line. LOL As if you don't already know that one. Facebook is not very private. All the information is out there for anyone to find out. If you haven't redone your privacy settings recently, all your friends phone numbers are available to everyone who is your friend. I'm glad that you helped get this woman the help she needed.
@cerebellum (3863)
• United States
19 Jan 11
I have never thought of a social networking site in this light. Now I see how helpful it can be. It is very helpful sometimes just to vent.
Good detective skills. A lot of people wouldn't have taken the time to figure out who she really was.Good work!!