I see a lot of dirty clothes piled up

It was her fault. Her bad decisions that her where she is now. She is lucky your brother did the right thing. Whether it is his child or not he is the one who stepped forward and did the right thing. There is an american saying that goes: She made her bed now she needs to lie in it.

She cannot reason her pregnancy why she cannot wash your brother's clothes when she can was her own. And thats not fair enough in your side to be the one who wash your brothers clothes, if she cannot wash it let your brother wash it, that is not your problem anymore.

How old is younger brother? If he is old enough to wash his own clothes then he should wash his own clothes and don't put that burden to anyone. Nevertheless if he is too young to wash clothes, then I think your sister in law should not make her pregnancy a reason why she does not want to wash his clothes unless of course she is is having a bad pregnancy and could not really wash all clothes of the people in the house.

hi, its not justified because here in my country even they are pregnant,they can still work both in the field and in the house so that being pregnant is not the reason to avoid work even washing there clothes.

I understand that we come from different cultures. Here, I do a lot of the chores around the house but my boyfriend will help me with them too. It's not a big deal for him to do his own laundry. His mother didn't baby him though when he was a kid and he did chores at home. His grandmother is Italian though and tried to baby him by picking up after him and not making him lift a finger.. I got lucky though, because his mother quickly ended that! I don't see why the female has to do all the work around the house, especially if it's a two-income family. Why should I bust my butt all day at work, then come home and clean up after you? But that's just MY culture. And as for her being pregnant... well, she is carrying another human being. Women handle pregnancy different. It doesn't affect some and they can go about their daily lives all throughout their pregnancy. Others are very tired and sick. Also, you didn't say how far along she was. If she's eight months pregnant, she probably doesn't want to be doing chores. If it were my brother, I'd tell him to wash his own clothes and be grateful his wife is carrying his child. But again, that's just me.

No, I dont see any justification to this. She is fully capable of doing laundry or at least her husband / your brother. You shouldnt have done it for them as now they will think you will continue to do their clothes.

I doubt that her pregnany is a valid reason for your sister-in-law not doing the laundry. Did she wash her own clothes? I probably would have done the same as you but am not sure it would have been the right thing to do.

My sister in law's house always seem to be messy also, often see dirty clothes here and there. I just don't think they are neat people. My sister in law is pregnant as well but I don't think that is an excuse for that because I was still clean and neat when I was pregnant. If that was my siste,r I wouldn't mind helping her washing the clothes though.

for asians, it is our culture to serve our husbands especially if we are full time housewives. by that i mean we wash clothes, do chores in the house, cook food so that when he comes home from work, the husband can already eat. your sister in law is a lazy bum. her being pregnant is not a reason. i think she feels she was forced to get into the marriage because of her condition which is so wrong. am sorry i am very straight to saying it. you should stay away from meddling with them. let them solve their own problems as a couple. your brother has to have a good talk with his wife. ann

Hello, dear. I am going to assume that the young brother you are referring here is also the husband of your sister-in-law. I can not tell if it should be justified. When she was not pregnant and she was doing the laundry including your brother's dirty clothes, and now that she is pregnant, she doesn't want to do it anymore, then, maybe, it has something to do with the pregnancy. Being pregnant makes us weird a little sometimes. Like we detest a particular food or person or even the sound of a particular thing or name and even we hate doing things that usually do not bother us when we are nto pregnant. Give her the benefit that she isn't doing his laundry because of her pregnancy. Maybe, it is true. You will see the difference when she's already given birth and still doesn't want to do it, then there must be something really not quite right about her.

You're sister in law has a problem. If she can wash her own clothes, then why can't she wash your brother's? If she is still in her first trimester of pregnancy, she can still do the laundry, it will not affect her pregnancy. But if she is already in her third trimester, then she has a reason not to wash the clothes of your brother. Try talking to her, maybe she and your brother had a fight about it and your brother doesn't want to do the laundry. Maybe your sister-in-law thinks she can still do laundry but not all the clothes including your brother's so she just washed hers and not including your brothers for he is able to do it on his own anyway since he doesn't carry anything on his womb. Just try talking to your sister-in-law and try t understand what her reasons are. And you did the right thing as well, washing the dirty clothes of your brother. It a family member anyway so it shouldn't be bad if you do it yourself.

Hi Indahfth - It's so nice of you to do that for your brother and sister-in-law. It seems like you are a really nice person to do such thing for them. I'm not really sure how to answer your question whether your sister-in-law's reason is justified. All I know is that it depends on the situation she is in. Is her pregnancy risky? If that's the case then it's just right for her not to do the laundry. However, I see other women here in our country who is capable of doing household chores including washing clothes even if they are pregnant. As for me I don't really wash clothes because we have a helper who drops by twice a week to do our laundry and help clean our home. It's because I'm also working so I don't have any time to do those things. But I make sure I still have time for my two sons even if I'm a working Mom. :) Have a nice day always...

Hi indahfth, Wow sadly you had to do the laundry and it is not fair. I know there are differences between our cultures but in all honesty there is no excuse for not doing the laundry. Pregnancy or not. I see that she has done her own but not his, then what is the point of being married to him. I do understand from the previous discussion the reason but surely so unfair. See here I do my boyfriends and sometimes he does mine and his own. I can understand that sometimes while pregnant we have restrictions from standing for too long but I think there is more there in her case because if she is doing her own why not his too. Of course you cannot change this because it is your brother who can make the changes. He is the only one who can make things right, but then he may not want to because of the her reasoning behind marrying him. You are too kind and so good nature indahfth for taking charge and doing his laundry, maybe you should show him how to do his own, if he can't because he is working, maybe he can at least either pay you a little something for doing it routinely for him, or at least continue to buy the laundry soap because I know you love your family very much and will continue to help. So in my opinion no her actions cannot be justified because she is doing her own so there is no reason why she cannot do his as well, and sorry your visit ended up being work for you. *sad*

Ever since I could operate a washing machine, I've had to wash my own clothes. It's not that difficult. My sister is a huge slob, she messes up the entire house, fills the sink with dishes, overpiles the garbage, and leaves junk everywhere. And she yells at ME for not cleaning it! People need discipline.

Hi. indahfth. If she is younger brother's wife, then maybe her pregnancy has caused her to have a change of heart. I think that your brother should just wash his own clothing being that his wife is pregnant. She may not feel too well to wash his clothing, which is quite understandable. I think that he should just try to chip in a little more because as a woman is carrying a child, she has to be careful about doing so much anyway.

well, she can ask somebody else to wash it and pay him/her. or take it to 'laundry kiloan' which is more effective. i bet in jogya many cheap laundry offer this. the pregnancy could be a good reason but you don't have to wash it, give her the solution. next time she had many dirty clothes, she will count on you to wash it

Pregnancy is no excuse for lazy, many pregnant women who still work, except for pregnancy problems. I've heard from doctors, women who are pregnant, should also always move the body, so that the process of childbirth is easy.

I wouldn't do it if I were you, that's their own issue. They're adults and married, they should manage it by themselves. If both of them cannot or don't want to do the laundry, then hire someone who will do it for them. Problem solved.