Dealing with Family Members that Don't Follow Through

@Shellyann36 (11606)
United States
April 18, 2013 10:00pm CST
I have a cousin that lives near me. She is only 15 minutes away and is the relative that lives closest to me. Well back in early March she asked me if I could get her daughter off of the bus in the afternoon at my house on the days that she is working. Currently she is only working 2 days a week but she graduates with her Paralegal degree in May and is looking for a full time job. Of course I said yes, she is willing to pay me and I need the money. The first day that I go to meet the bus I wait with all 3 of my kids in the hot van for over an hour. I text my cousin and she finally gets in touch with the school and finds out that her daughter was at the school house because the bus she rides does not come by my house. (Major miscomunication between my cousin and the bus driver.) That was the first and the last day. My cousin has not mentioned it to me again. She did call me that afternoon after going to the school and talking with the Vice Principle. Her daughter's bus route does not go by my home at all. She has had problems with the current bus driver because the driver let her daughter off one afternoon when no one was waiting at the bus stop for her. (She is in Pre-K & the rules are that if an adult is not waiting at the bus stop the child does not get off.) It is not a problem for her daughter to ride the bus that comes by my house when she works but she has not made the arrangements and has not said another word about it. I am very disappointed because I was looking forward to the extra money it would bring in for our household. Has anyone ever disappointed you by not following through with a plan &/or by not discussing it with you again?
6 people like this
12 responses
• United States
19 Apr 13
I try never to deal with family and cash. if I were to pick up anyone in my family it would be for free. the relationship is better that way. and I would hope if they were to do me a favor it would be free for me as well. Like we do each others hair and share clothes and give each other food when low and much more. no cash is involved.. when I baby sat for my sister never would I charge her.
3 people like this
@kalav56 (11497)
• India
19 Apr 13
Money enters a relationship and out goes good feelings and bonding.
@Shellyann36 (11606)
• United States
19 Apr 13
giftsandbags I am afraid that my cousin has been taking advantage of me for years now and that I never get anything but aggravation in return. She has used me for a free babysitter, a free place to live and has even stolen clothes from me. I am afraid there is no trading with her.
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (89882)
• Philippines
14 Aug 15
Yes, i have experienced that once and it made me angry . I felt by-passed.
2 people like this
@Shellyann36 (11606)
• United States
14 Aug 15
It is a real pain and is very frustrating. I don't have anything to do with my cousin anymore. It is better for me that way.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (112636)
• United States
7 Aug 15
It happens over and over again. We are back here, on MyLot and looking for old friends.
1 person likes this
@Shellyann36 (11606)
• United States
10 Aug 15
I just found out that the place is open for business again and I am happy to be back! How are you doing? Is Marsha32 here as well?
1 person likes this
@winterose (39899)
• Canada
21 Apr 13
of course it has a happened to everyone for various reasons. I was once asked to be a god mother and I was all prepared to do it. I bought the coming home clothes for the baby. But I just did not have the money for the christening dress. So then my friend decided she wasn't going to the church she would just name the baby at city hall.
1 person likes this
@Shellyann36 (11606)
• United States
21 Apr 13
It is very frustrating isn't it?
1 person likes this
@cutepenguin (6448)
• Canada
20 Apr 13
I have a cousin who is a bit like this. She's gotten better in that she will make arrangements for things like this, but she is still frustrating in that she wants free childcare for her daughter but never reciprocates for family members (but is always willing to help out her friends).
1 person likes this
@Shellyann36 (11606)
• United States
21 Apr 13
My cousin has actually improved a bit. She still aggravates me and is like your cousin.... willing to go to the end of the world for her friends but not for her family. Thank you for coming by!
1 person likes this
@cynthiann (18613)
• Jamaica
19 Apr 13
Relatives do seem to take advantage of other relatives. I think that your cousin was very rude to you actually.
1 person likes this
@Shellyann36 (11606)
• United States
20 Apr 13
I know my cousin certainly does. Thank you for stopping by.
1 person likes this
@jennifer611 (2502)
• United States
19 Apr 13
Oh yes. I have a friend who always asks me to watch her kids either while she works or while she is out partying. I am a stay at home mom, and not the party type anymore. so I don't mind watching them and also, I can really use the money. she said on more then one occasion that she would be dropping them off to me. she has to be to work very early so she drops them off before 6am. which means I have to get up very early. I sit and wait and wait and wait.. they never show. later I find out she got someone else to stay home with them so she didn't need to bring them. I was so mad. and then she did the same thing again. I already had to get up early to get my kids to school but because of her I got up way earlier then I would have and now for no reason. she could have texted me but never did. but as far as the bus goes and them letting your cousins daughter off without a parent or someone there for her, that is so dangerous! just a few months ago we had a bus driver in our area drop off a little girl who was special needs, to a apartment complex they had moved away from! she was suppose to drop her off at the new address and somehow she forgot. a lady from the apartment complex talked the bus driver into letting her take the little girl. this woman didn't even know the little girl. the bus driver gave her to her and left. the parents were waiting for the girl and she never came. police were called and found out the bus driver gave her to a lady at the old apartment and found out this lady kidnapped the girl and they found her in a parking lot somewhere with the little girl in her car. since the girl is special needs she was unable to tell if anything happened. but thankfully they got her back. bus drivers need to pay better attention to what they do. there are scary people in this world. I'm glad she is ok though. I hope everything works out for you. I know how frustrating it can be to work with someone who is not reliable.
1 person likes this
@Shellyann36 (11606)
• United States
19 Apr 13
Jennifer you know exactly what I am talking about then! It is very annoying. Your friend sounds just like my cousin. I am not going to say anything to my cousin about it but if she decides to call me out of the blue one day and say oh can you get tay off of the bus on such and such date I am going to have something to do. I would suggest that you do the same thing. That is horrible about the bus driver letting the special needs girl off at the wrong address and in the care of a stranger. I hope that she was not hurt.
1 person likes this
@kalav56 (11497)
• India
19 Apr 13
One thing that I can tell you is that having any type of monetary business transaction with a relative always ruins the relationship.Relatives always have a right royal attitude of 'taking you for granted'.
1 person likes this
@Shellyann36 (11606)
• United States
19 Apr 13
Oh yes this I do know. This particular cousin use to live with me and I babysat her daughter for free almost 24/7. The deal was when she moved in with me that I would watch T while she worked the 2nd shift job that she had and she would get up and watch my 3 year old while I worked my 1st shift online job. It never happened that way. She would go out after work and not come home til 4 am and be hung over when she got home. I would have to drag her out of bed at 7 to get her up by 8 when my shift started. It was horrible. She has made improvements in her life and has stopped partying so I thought that this would be a good time to try to at least get some $ out of her.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37379)
• United States
19 Apr 13
Yes it has happened a few times. You have to just get over it...and maybe when she does find full time employment she will make the correct arrangements and you can earn a few bucks on the side.....hopefully!
@Shellyann36 (11606)
• United States
20 Apr 13
Good to see you jillhill! I don't think she will come to me for help. If she does I am going to let her know that I cannot do it. Thanks for stopping by.
@Fleura (9955)
• United Kingdom
2 Nov 15
Some people are so rude, all it takes is a quick message beforehand to make arrangements and explain the situation, not just leaving you and your children waiting there for nothing, wasting your time. You would be better off to set up as a paid child-minder and collect other people's children if you need a bit more income!
• India
27 Apr 13
It is best to give or receive money from relatives, if you give just forget; i had helped may in the past, i not only lost the money but the persons, they were not seen never replied to my telephone calls either.
@ANTIQUELADY (36471)
• United States
23 Apr 13
MANY, MANY TIMES, i have been disappointed by people not following through w/what they have told me. I hate that. I don't care whether it's something not important or not. If u tell me u are going to do it that is what i expect u to do. This is one of my pet peeves.