Advice for the masses
By Jekca
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
Centralia, Missouri
October 12, 2015 12:51pm CST
People often give unsolicited advise, it's in our natures. I don't know if that's because we like to tell people what to do, or if that we feel better when we feel like we have all the answers, or because we see other's walking into mistakes and want to prevent some heartache (I have a feeling the reasons are very dependent on the time, place, and situation). Still, it can be nice or annoying. I want to make it funny!
So I am challenging you to give me some, the funnier or odder the better.
Here goes, don't eat yellow snow.
Yes, I totally went there.
24 people like this
18 responses
- hee hee.
Advice may be for free, but you may have to pay for your actions.
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
13 Oct 15
@much2say Both actually, but I was originally talking about the advice one!
There have been a couple times when I thought it through before taking some advice, because the consequences that I might have had to pay would have been too high, even though the advice was well-intentioned.
There have been a couple times when I thought it through before taking some advice, because the consequences that I might have had to pay would have been too high, even though the advice was well-intentioned.2 people like this
@much2say (57760)
• Los Angeles, California
13 Oct 15
@purplealabaster The yellow rain or the advice one? 
1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
12 Oct 15
but I dont wanna! I dont like it! lol
1 person likes this
@AbbyGreenhill (45490)
• United States
12 Oct 15
@Jessicalynnt I didn't know you really had one...I just assume everyone is retired.
2 people like this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
12 Oct 15
@AbbyGreenhill I wish, but no, many years before that. Im a dispatcher and quota manager for a major telecommunication provider, dont mind the work but I'm a home body I hate being out that long
1 person likes this
@arthurchappell (44941)
• Preston, England
12 Oct 15
don't cross the bridge till you come to it - I'd love to know how I'm supposed to do otherwise. Time travel?
2 people like this
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
13 Oct 15
I could try standing away from the bridge and throwing you over it to see whether or not that would work.
1 person likes this
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
13 Oct 15
@arthurchappell If you weigh the same as eighteen stones, then can't I just do with you as I would do with them and throw them one by one?
By the way, I am not sure what "eighteen stone" is, but I am guessing from your comment that it is a lot.
By the way, I am not sure what "eighteen stone" is, but I am guessing from your comment that it is a lot.1 person likes this
@cahaya1983 (11116)
• Malaysia
13 Oct 15
Don't give cream cheese to a 2-year-old. She'd turn it into body butter. Yes, personal experience.
3 people like this
@yukimori (10193)
• United States
13 Oct 15
@Jessicalynnt Mine actually refused to play with the shaving cream at daycare yesterday. She poked it with a finger, looked at it, and then demanded that we wipe it off because she was done. 
She did have fun 'tattooing' her legs and belly with a permanent marker over the weekend, though... 
She did have fun 'tattooing' her legs and belly with a permanent marker over the weekend, though... 1 person likes this
@cahaya1983 (11116)
• Malaysia
13 Oct 15
@Jessicalynnt Most of the things, yeah. Lucky mine didn't try that with the chocolate spread.
1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
13 Oct 15
dont toddlers do that with anything they can smear?
2 people like this
@crazyhorseladycx (39503)
• United States
12 Oct 15
i fear i've no words 'f funny advice. i did've a friends momma always tell us that fat looks better tanned...but these days that's a big no-no.
3 people like this
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
13 Oct 15
LOL - when I read "tanned fat" all I could think about was bacon!
2 people like this
@PainsOnSlate (21845)
• Canada
13 Oct 15
The funniest one I've ever heard was never make eye contact while eating a Banana. It made me laugh so hard I choked on that banana.
3 people like this
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
13 Oct 15
A banana has eyes?!
I would say a good general rule is do not eat anything that has eyes with which you can make contact.
I would say a good general rule is do not eat anything that has eyes with which you can make contact.1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
13 Oct 15
I had to think about that for a second, then giggled. lol!
1 person likes this
@PainsOnSlate (21845)
• Canada
13 Oct 15
@purplealabaster sorry I won't explain it but you need a dirty mind to appreciate it
1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
13 Oct 15
unless we are talking a lemon slush of course
1 person likes this
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
13 Oct 15
Don't poke an alligator in the head with a stick, especially if you are in murky water with it.
2 people like this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
13 Oct 15
Id add, dont be in murky water with things with teeth!
1 person likes this
@Kchitij2007 (445)
• Pune, India
13 Oct 15
Here are some close to my heart-
-If a street performer gets you to stop and watch; you owe him/her a buck.
-Never make a professional call between 9 pm and 9 am
-Sympathy's a crutch, don't fake a limp!
-Never take calls on dinner table.
-if you've made your point, stop talking!
( and that's what am gonna do now 
)
)2 people like this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
13 Oct 15
love those, especially the one on the street performers, if you stop, then they deserve paid for their time
1 person likes this
@ria1606roy (2797)
• Kolkata, India
12 Oct 15
Always carry extra money on you. You might not know what situation you will be in.
2 people like this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
13 Oct 15
like when the card machine is down!
2 people like this
@ria1606roy (2797)
• Kolkata, India
13 Oct 15
@Jessicalynnt yes that. Over here, there maybe technical problems with transportation and you have to go by alternative route or hail a taxi. In that case, extra money helps. Or if you get hungry, you can quickly grab a bite which was unplanned.
2 people like this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
13 Oct 15
hahaha, ok that one was pretty good, and very true!
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
13 Oct 15
Shoot ... I actually know the answer to this, because I read it somewhere a while ago, but I can't think of why it happens at the moment. Maybe @owlwings or @yukimori or @phredwreck can help me out here as this head-cold is really impairing my ability to think and remember.
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
13 Oct 15
that is super odd. I would drop a line to mylot, @myLotBugs in specific, and ask for help, not sure why you pencil is missing!
2 people like this
@allknowing (153544)
• India
13 Oct 15
Always eat lunch before breakfast and dinner before lunch
1 person likes this
@allknowing (153544)
• India
14 Oct 15
@Jessicalynnt But if you eat breakfast for dinner you will have to eat lunch for breakfast and dinner for lunch and ............I am confused. How about eating breakfast for lunch and dinner
@tomford (135)
• Richmond, Virginia
13 Oct 15
often unsolicited advice isn't something that helps us but annoys us so ill give you mine. when you shop for milk grab the cartons in the back of the fridge they usually are the freshest the ones in the front have been there a longer time
1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
14 Oct 15
this is very good, and I almost always try for that
@sherryeb (580)
• Duncan, Arizona
13 Oct 15
My advice would be...hmmmm...lemmee think...uh.....I got it...eat lots of chocolate for absolutely no reason!
@purplealabaster (22085)
• United States
13 Oct 15
I like that one. I will get started on that right away. Oh wait, I actually have a reason today, so starting next week I will just eat it for no reason!
Oh wait, I actually have a reason today, so starting next week I will just eat it for no reason!2 people like this
@BACONSTRIPSXXX (18082)
• Torrington, Connecticut
12 Oct 15
lol No yellow snow I got it Jejejeje
2 people like this
