Let's discuss getting old!
By GreatMartin
@GreatMartin (23675)
Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
January 29, 2016 9:10am CST
I love being old--really--and we can discuss that at another time!
For the past thirty five years I have sort of adjusted to the fact that I would be crossing out names in my address book due to people dying of AIDS but now a different kind of death is happening--I am losing friends to age.
last night I received a call that a friend of mine for 40 years died--he was just a year away from being retired! (Another lesson is don't put off what you want to do because you may never do it!) Granted he had health problems--mainly weighing 300 pounds when he died--diabetes, a heart condition, high blood pressure--but it doesn't diminish the fact that he is dead.
Joe had a beautiful voice--sang, and traveled, with many choirs--when younger a very outgoing fun type of person but the last few years haven't been easy for him--his family turned their back on him--he started to back away from social situations--stopped singing--I will miss him as I miss the other 5 friends who have died of old age in the past 6 months.
Right now I am looking at the possibility of another death with a friend in hospice and another who had a severe stroke 2 weeks ago and may not recover.
Granted most are not 'young' guys--sorry but over 60 is not young--like those who were taken by AIDS in their 20s, 30s and 40s but the loss feels the same. With the latter you wonder what they could have/would have accomplished--what they could have/would have added to the world to make it a better place--with the former you can only hope they reached their potential, had no regrets and said 'Goodbye' before they left.
I stopped going to funerals in 1982 but I will never forget those who died--Joe will be laid to rest tomorrow--I will play one of his recordings and remember the joy he brought to many during his lifetime.
Though death can hit any of us at anytime don't forget the old(er) people in your life--it's too late once they are gone.
31 people like this
25 responses
@cindiowens (5120)
• North Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
29 Jan 16
You are so right, but not only the older ones, anyone can leave us at any time. Sometimes we are given no warning at all.
3 people like this
@vandana7 (98986)
• India
1 Feb 16
@GreatMartin ..It pretty much depends upon where you are I suppose. Out here there are no exclusively for seniors communities other than the homes. Only recently...in about last decade some are coming up. Some do like to live separately I suppose. Like this uncle I used to meet on road. Even inside the house, he was inclined to keep to himself in his room, and his meals would be served in his room. He felt he was having problems in eating properly in front of others. Being 80+ is not so easy when you have nobody to share a smile with.
@GreatMartin (23675)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
31 Jan 16
@vandana7 I live in a community of 300 seniors--most don'r have family and those that do find their kids are 'too busy'. In any case some choose to stay in their apartments and feel sorry for themselves instead of making friends with the other 299!! It is their choice.
2 people like this
@GreatMartin (23675)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
2 Feb 16
@hellopeeps I have loved EVERY moment of getting OLD! And plan on keeping getting older!
@jaboUK My friends know they are THE most important people in my life!
1 person likes this
@Marcyaz (35316)
• United States
30 Jan 16
It is a terrible loss when we lose those friends who we are close to. I have lost many friends in the last couple of years also and it is hard. I will remember each and every one. My time will come soon enough because of my health issues will I will stay positive until the end.
2 people like this
@snowy22315 (170598)
• United States
29 Jan 16
You have a really positivie attitude and I predict you will live a good long time. One of the worst things about being old is that sadly you live to see the deaths of those you liked and cared for, I had a cousin die this past week who was not very old at all only 61,,,and it was very unexpected and a shock. I know the longer i live the more likely that is to happen..and it is hard.
3 people like this
@vandana7 (98986)
• India
29 Jan 16
I agree. There is no way we can say sorry once the older one are gone. That is why I wish to be there for them. Always. It is not as much for dad as for me because I would not be able to live with me if guilt overtakes about me not having given him sufficient attention and care when he is alive.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45939)
• United States
29 Jan 16
The one thing I have come to know is it is hardest for the living to go on. Working in the health field, I have seen more than my fair share of loss. This is true to my life as well. I have lost so many family members in the past few years.
My Mother and Uncle are the last of 7 children born to my grandparents. My siblings and I have discussed the fact on more than one occasion that we are soon to be the family matriarchs.
Remembering those that have past with their stories, their laughter, their love keeps them alive.
2 people like this
@yalul070 (1713)
• Manila, Philippines
29 Jan 16
I'm sorry for your loss. That's life I guess. In my case, i am hoping that I reach your age because right now i feel like i'm not living a life of my own. It's always about coping and catching up with the requirements at home and at work. I also want to experience retirement and find out what I really want and have time to do it.
1 person likes this
@simone10 (54189)
• Louisville, Kentucky
8 Feb 16
@GreatMartin It really is, isn't it? That and not being able to do some of the things you used to do. That really bothers me and I'm working on trying to feel better about it.
@GreatMartin (23675)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
8 Feb 16
As I've said that's the only thing about getting old--losing peers!!
1 person likes this
@softbabe44 (5816)
• Vancouver, Washington
30 Jan 16
He sounds like he was the type of friend to have that's sad he passed I'm sure he is recognized by all a great guy so sorry.
1 person likes this
@manya_pearl (1901)
• Singapore
2 Feb 16
By being old... in my thought... before your hair literally goes white... oh youve got to make all things you want (positive and useful) in your life and so you can stand bravely to tell the young... hey kid, you know your uncle or aunt or your mother/father was a (whatever represent you). Doing good and doing positive will inspire the young people to do better. I am not old but everyday i know that aging is happeninh in every cell of our body and old friends or relatives thay you seldom meet will look older and you will realize that everyone gettinh old and old... so while im sgoll young and free to walk with my own feet and work with my own hands o got to try all things... my parents are old so we always encourage them to keep healthy for them to enjoy seeinh their grandchild growing.
@celticeagle (159574)
• Boise, Idaho
31 Jan 16
So sad to lose people. I am 64 and wonder sometimes how long I will last. My BFF's family have lost several to cancer. I haven't lost anyone since my mom and dad in the last 90's from cancer. The big B and your HIV sure can twist your emotions. So unfair.
@41CombedaleRoad (5952)
• Greece
6 Mar 16
I know what you mean about the address book, mine is out of date now and I am reluctant to cross out the names and update it.
@GreatMartin (23675)
• Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
7 Mar 16
I just bought myself a new address book---that is the first step!! LOL
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
31 Jan 16
I am the old people in my life, lol okay well my mom is 100 so she is older. I make it a habit to try to not let friends slip away from my life so I have no regrets. I have had a lot of deaths in my circle in the last 2 months and I am hoping it slows down soon. Sorry about your friend.
@DeborahDiane (40066)
• Laguna Woods, California
1 Feb 16
Since I am 66 and my husband is 71, we have lost a number of friends the past few years to old age, too. It can be hard, even though it is not unexpected.
