Am I invisible?

@BelleStarr (61047)
United States
May 14, 2016 11:18am CST
I am not complaining mind you, everyone is entitled to handle their posts and comments anyway they like but I do wonder why some people choose to ignore half of their comments. Am I invisible to them? I do try to respond to everyone that comments on my posts but I am finding that certain members seem to be ignoring me if I comment on their posts. I am feeling a little curious about it. Do you pick and choose who you respond to? I am wondering if they just don't like me. I don't think I have ever done anything to make them dislike me or maybe it is just that my comments aren't interesting enough to respond to and my post are not things they like to read. I know I think about these things too much!! It is supposed to be fun but I feel like ignoring some people is bound to cause hurt or bad feelings at some point. I know I don't like it when people seem to find my comments and posts invisible. And no, my picture has nothing to do with my post but who doesn't like a cup of coffee!! lol
39 people like this
43 responses
@Juliaacv (48495)
• Canada
14 May 16
I can get behind occasionally, but your posts are among the ones that I quickly scan for when I come on the site, as I look forward to reading them. I've a similar problem, which I am trying to formulate the words correctly to do a post on myself. But I have members that I follow and that I regularly read and comment on their posts, and they will reply to my comments, however, they fail to comment or like any of my posts. I don't want it to come across as an eye for an eye, you comment on mine and I'll return the favour, as that is very shallow, but it makes me wonder. Perhaps tomorrow I'll have the words just right to put this up. But honey, you are NOT invisible to me and I just LOVE your discussions!
9 people like this
@Juliaacv (48495)
• Canada
14 May 16
@BelleStarr I think that you did a good job on clearing the air so to speak, because these are not good habits and we do want to encourage good habits on the site.
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (48495)
• Canada
14 May 16
@miniam And I agree with you, there are some discussions where I am at a loss to come up with something intelligent to respond with, so I just like the conversation at that point and go along my way to the next one.
@miniam (9154)
• Bern, Switzerland
14 May 16
@BelleStarr As i said earlier,maybe they read but feel they have nothing to add to the discussion
4 people like this
@jaboUK (64361)
• United Kingdom
14 May 16
I'm the same as you in that I reply to all responses on my post, no matter how long it takes. It just seems rude not to. I may unintentionally miss one here and there if they get buried at the bottom of a lot of comments, but I usually find it eventually. I think that people who ignore their responses are missing the point - this is supposed to be a discussion site. I'm afraid I will ignore people if I never get any feedback from them.
4 people like this
@Vjvals (906)
• Roseville, California
14 May 16
It's more ingrained with the British people as I know this in dealing with both online sites and people (relatives) They find it rude not to respond or acknowledge others.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
@jaboUK I have come to the conclusion that I need to move on from these one sided relationships and not waste my time trying to engage them. Sad that but oh well there are many people who do interact with me.
3 people like this
@jaboUK (64361)
• United Kingdom
14 May 16
@BelleStarr That's it - concentrate on the ones who do interact. Though I try new people too.
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
14 May 16
I try to respond to every comment I get. Sometimes if their the last ones on my discussion it just takes longer for me to get to them. Sometimes I don't see it in my notifications because I am focused on the more recent ones. It could just be an over sight.
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
14 May 16
@BelleStarr I always try to give the benefit of the doubt. Lol, sorry. It's just me. =)
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
@LovingMyBabies lol You are sweet and I do give the benefit but I have tested it about 5 or 6 times now and come to the conclusion that it is not an accident.
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
I don't think in these cases it is oversight. I do the same as you and go back when I have time for the later comments on some of my older posts. I don't always see them in the notifications either.
1 person likes this
@MALUSE (69413)
• Germany
14 May 16
I wonder why your photo is lying on its left side? I don't understand your problem, to be honest. I don't often reply to comments. I read them and enjoy them (or not) and move on. If I don't do this, I can stay in a comment thread forever! Isn't it better to make many people happy with comments instead of one or only a few people?
3 people like this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
No I don't think so, we are suppose to be discussing, that means not a one way conversation. Ignoring comments or only responding to some defeats the purpose of this site, which is discussion!! When I first downloaded the picture it was too large, it will lay on its side so I re-sized it and now it is fine.
3 people like this
@JohnRoberts (109857)
• Los Angeles, California
14 May 16
Because most posts don't elicit a response. Many comments are generic. You don't always have something intelligent to respond with. Members can't job the system with nothing but Thank you comments. There should be no obligation to response to comments and understand nothing personal.
3 people like this
@Bluedoll (16774)
• Canada
15 May 16
No reply no money. Nothing personal.
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 May 16
I try not to read posts that have no interest for me. I can always come up with some sort of response or acknowledgement. That is what this site is all about, interaction.
@miniam (9154)
• Bern, Switzerland
14 May 16
Or,you post discussions where some people feel they have nothing to add.I dont choose who the post is from, if i like a post i will comment , if i dont well i will pass it. So because someone replied to my post does not always mean l will reply to their post. Stop feeling ingored, you are not.
3 people like this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
I am by some members. I don't expect everyone to read every post, obviously we all have different interests. But ignoring comments and then never visiting that person's posts does not lead to friendly interaction. It begins to feel like an exclusive club where only some members are up to the exclusive standards. Just saying.
@MALUSE (69413)
• Germany
14 May 16
I think the same as you.
2 people like this
• United States
14 May 16
I'll take tea instead of coffee please! I have never liked coffee but I do like coffee flavored desserts, treats and candies, lol! I'm someone who tries to comment back but sometimes I may accidentally skip. As far as picking who to comment I check malt recent and go from there but as I go on different times the most recent always changes! And depending on the day I sometimes am not as active on myLot as I'd like. For topics I do not get a lot of comments then I guess it's because the post is lacking and I'll keep that in mind. But sometimes it's just a vent and I don't mind if people don't comment on it.
2 people like this
• United States
30 May 16
@BelleStarr yes if it's over and over I would stop responding to them.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 May 16
It is one thing when people accidentally miss a comment but when it happens over and over agaiin it seems deliberate
1 person likes this
@marlina (154165)
• Canada
14 May 16
Hello @BelleStarr, I hope I am not one of the ones who ignore you! Sometimes I miss a few here and there. It also depends if it is a subject that I have interest in it or not.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
lol No dear friend you are not, hardy a day goes by when we don't interact at least once. I look forward to starting my day with you.
@amadeo (111948)
• United States
14 May 16
I would not be too concern about this.I wrote a similar post.Not sure if you read ti
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 May 16
I am not sure if I did either but I think it is rude to ignore comments.
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 May 16
@amadeo NO I know, I didn't name name either.
@amadeo (111948)
• United States
30 May 16
@BelleStarr I am sure lot of do here.They do not take the time.I went through with this.Not naming names
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16573)
• Ireland
14 May 16
Is it possible they just missed your comments?
2 people like this
@Bluedoll (16774)
• Canada
15 May 16
Are you locked up in that picture. Hello there in the castle. Waving.
1 person likes this
@Bluedoll (16774)
• Canada
15 May 16
@Bluedoll Someone told me on a comment on one of my posts that I sometimes make weird comments. Do you think that is true?
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16573)
• Ireland
15 May 16
@Bluedoll lol no I was the one doing the rescue of the locked up chick
1 person likes this
@pgntwo (22408)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
15 May 16
Either that is a big spoon or a small cup... Either way, the coffee looks most appetizing. Hope some of your comments have an impact, even if they draw no response.
1 person likes this
@Bluedoll (16774)
• Canada
15 May 16
Its raining today here.
1 person likes this
@Bluedoll (16774)
• Canada
15 May 16
@pgntwo we need rain, well the plant live needs rain not really coming down too hard though overcast yeah.
1 person likes this
@pgntwo (22408)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
15 May 16
@Bluedoll Overcast with sunny spells here, temps back to the more normal 10degC from the giddy highs of 21degClast week.
@PainsOnSlate (21854)
• Canada
14 May 16
You make me want another cup. I do not discriminate. I return every comment that hits my discussions, sometimes I'm a bit late but I do catch up. What pisses me off if when someone leaves a comment and you know from what they say they didn't bother to read a word I wrote.. and yes I ever return the favor to them but I read their discussion first before commenting.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
lol Yes we all get that. They read the title and assume it is about something totally else. I will probably get at least one comment about cloaking devices with this post lol No this appears more like a deliberate I am not going to notice you at all and I am at the point of writing them off and not bothering any more.
1 person likes this
@miniam (9154)
• Bern, Switzerland
14 May 16
I can not understand why someone will leave a comment without reading a post,l prefer to read and not reply if i have nothing to contribute than comment with nothing to add or not having read the post.
3 people like this
• Canada
14 May 16
@miniam This person was new, He had only one or two posts (the two sentence kind) and I wondered if he could read my post, perhaps not fluent in English. But if that is the reason, you would think that reading and learning would help. I think he was just lazy, rushing to comment so others would visit his posts...
1 person likes this
@Daljinder (23233)
• Bangalore, India
14 May 16
I try to make sure that I reply back to everyone. Even if the response or comment has nothing but a smiley. I do reply back. I think maybe you shed that shield that give you invisibility Or maybe share it with me.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
14 May 16
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
lol I do like to share so I will let you use it too!!
1 person likes this
• United States
15 May 16
I am new here, so I know I have never done this to you. But, I could not help but poke my nose on your post and be intrigued. I think it really just depends on the owner of the post. Maybe they didn't know what to say? I know that is a personal problem with me because sometimes I'll read it and my mind will go blank. As for how intense and busy this site is, they might have skimmed over it by accident or even just forgot. You are nowhere near invisible though. I promise you that much. Oh, and now I want coffee. Lol!
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
16 May 16
Well you came to the right place since I have a Keurig and can make you a nice fresh cup anytime you want!! And welcome by the way.
• United States
16 May 16
@BelleStarr Lol :) thank you. I know I'm going to need some coffee soon, it's going to be a late night of working again!
1 person likes this
@Asylum (47893)
• Manchester, England
14 May 16
It defeats the whole object of being here if you do not respond to everyone who comments. That is the whole concept of a discussion.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
That is what I have always thought as well but there are several members who have gotten into the habit of being exclusive rather than inclusive.
@MALUSE (69413)
• Germany
14 May 16
@BelleStarr @Asylum I do respond but not to each and every comment. Can you tell me after how many to-and-fro responses a discussion is allowed to peter out in your opinion?
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
@MALUSE Every comment is different some only require one response and others go on forever so the best I can say is it depends but it is more fun when it goes back and forth at least a couple of times in my opinion. But lets say that you commented on 5 of my posts and I never responded to your comments or visited any of your posts, you would think that was perfectly all right? Or would you think you were invisible?
@Orson_Kart (6118)
• United Kingdom
14 May 16
They probably don't like you. Happens to me also.
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
15 May 16
@Orson_Kart You are not easy to overlook Orson.
2 people like this
• United Kingdom
14 May 16
@BelleStarr OK, I've liked you again. Happy? Interaction is the key, and if it's not a two way thing then yeah it's time to move on.
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
lol But I am so likable!! I guess I will just move on and find some new people to interact with!!
1 person likes this
• United States
15 May 16
Well, not giving excuses - but something it happens. I know many who don't comment on mine but I spend a lot of time commenting on theirs. I think it all works out eventually.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 May 16
It may in the long run but one does get tired of reading n a one way street!!
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 May 16
@AbbyGreenhill lol I have pretty much done that.
• United States
30 May 16
@BelleStarr There's a way to end that one way street....close it down! LOL
1 person likes this
• Midland, Michigan
14 May 16
Minisam talked about something very similar to this recently depending on exactly to what you're referring. I'll say that for me, I tend to hang with those that take time out of their day to come check me out and if they only do that when I stop by to visit with them, I'm okay with that as that's about the way I have to roll right now. I mainly have two somewhat good days to mylot each week, with a bit of time to interact here and there. For instance, I still have your response to one of my posts showing on my notification from May 7. I've been trying to visit with you for several days now, but my computer or browser I should say keeps crashing or loading, loading, loading until I finally give up. I've recently cleared my browsing history and cookies to see if that will help. So far so good, but... There are those that never, or rarely reply when we comment on their posts and a few that never come back to visit with us. For those folks, I choose to visit them less often than those that do stop by. If I could be here all day that might be different. Heading off to work now to see if I can work my shift. I have a sinus headache that is hanging on.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
15 May 16
@MarshaMusselman I got excited one day when I saw this persons name in my notifications, I thought they responded on my post, well not to me they didn't they commented on someone else's comment but none to me, so very strange!!
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
14 May 16
It is the later that I am talking about not busy people which so many of us are. We enjoy interacting when we can and we don't worry how many days it takes to respond. But we will respond to comments and then read the posts those who have taken the time. Some people just don't respond or come and visit and that is who I am going to stop trying to interact with.
1 person likes this
• Midland, Michigan
15 May 16
@BelleStarr I've already done that myself. There's one person that I was going to stop back to read and comment on more of their comments received, and I already left two of my own, but that particular person hadn't bothered to come by my stuff at all, so I'm not hurrying to check out those other comments after all. One person that visits with some members but not all that visit with them I'd wondered what to write about to have them visit and then was surprised they did visit with one post of mine several months ago. It's just bizarre to me that certain people don't think of these things the same way that many of us do. Sometimes I wonder whether those that visit with these people realize they're not getting returned responses or comments and whether they care or not. I keep track of whom I visit with each day and whether they came to see me first or after the fact. Maybe many of the ones that don't do what we do here don't think we will realize they're not coming around as often as we're visiting with them, or they just don't really care.
1 person likes this
@sallypup (58046)
• Centralia, Washington
30 May 16
Cocoa. Coffee upsets my stomach. Just call me lazy.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 May 16
I am sorry about the coffee, that would ruin my day for sure.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 May 16
@sallypup I don't drink strong coffee I prefer a light roast or at the most medium. I can't understand the appeal of coffee so strong it can eat the finish off a spoon lol
1 person likes this
@sallypup (58046)
• Centralia, Washington
30 May 16
@BelleStarr My cocoa is this side of the strength of coffee. Maybe the milk saves me.
1 person likes this
15 May 16
I"m sorry if i am one of them. I've been so busy i haven't had time to read through everything (so I've tried to not post anymore either until I can catch up a bit)
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
30 May 16
No you are not one of them at all I know what a busy life you have and we often have exchanges.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61047)
• United States
31 May 16
@jillybean1222 I haven't been on much recently, today is the most I have been on this month.
31 May 16
@BelleStarr i was feeling guilty because i don't seem to get over here as much as i'd like... when we were all bubbling away at the big B, i spent more time than i do now... seems life is crazy busy. :-) i love to come over here when i can
1 person likes this