Cat Stuck In A Tree

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I went into a flower shop today and I said to the woman, "Hi, do you have flowers for people that mess up? Not me, it's for a friend." She said, "What did your friend do?" "Why did you wink your eye when you said 'friend' just then. Are you a disgruntled botanist?" She apologized and I said, "He accidentally duck-taped the family cat to the top of a tree. And, it was bird mating season, so it was ugly, so I'm told. The worst part was removing the duck-tape, that got ugly, too." She said, "I bet, I can see the scratches all over your arms and face." I replied, "That's from my wife. I mean, this is from a horrific can opening incident. So, do you have flowers that can make up for this?" She said, "Tell your friend that he is a heartless, self-centered, mean-spirited, abusive loser. I'm calling the police!” That was suspicious, so I fled the scene.