How Close is the Real You to How you Come Across here?
By Shiva
@Shiva49 (28397)
Singapore
July 1, 2016 4:58am CST
I have been with online sites for years now. I am enjoying it for sure.
The real joy is in reflecting my personality through what I post and how I respond.
I want to be as close to who I am in real life. There is no hypocrisy involved – no chance, not at all, and my wife will testify to that as she is a reader of my posts and responses. I tell her never a hypocrite be, and she will be the first to take me to task if I prove to be one! Et tu, Brute? resonates.
I am sure most are like me and it is a pleasure to interact with all.
Having been active on few sites I am aware we have to be influenced by the rules of the site as well as how others come across. It is clear myLot enforces the rules of decorum like most others I have been on. On one site, however, there were fireworks aplenty and personal attacks were common; woe betide those who dare disagree with few!
I love the way we carry on here – live and let others live – at the same time make our stand clear and then move on without bitterness or rancor.
What is your take on this?
21 people like this
20 responses
@LovingMyBabies (85923)
• Valdosta, Georgia
1 Jul 16
I am the absolute same person here as I am everywhere else. I try my hardest to treat others as I want to be treated-offline and online.
6 people like this
@hereandthere (45628)
• Philippines
1 Jul 16
i guess i'm more of a hypocrite. mylot is my chance to present a better me. 
5 people like this
@innertalks (23745)
• Australia
3 Jul 16
I too am a hypocrite like this. I try to be who I think I really am, or who I could be, or aspire to be, or would like to be in real life, here on mylot, but in real life I am far too wimpish to ever have the courage to be like that.
3 people like this
@Shiva49 (28397)
• Singapore
3 Jul 16
@innertalks I have reduced the deficit over time between the real me and how I present myself to others.
At myLot too I am the real me.
That helps to have a smooth ride and and enhances the trust others have in me - siva
3 people like this
@responsiveme (22923)
• India
1 Jul 16
I am learning quite a lot , in fact how people can still get along even if they disagree.
6 people like this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
6 Jul 16
A good question siva. I've come to the conclusion that i don't know myself very well as there are so many different facets to me. I feel that I adapt according to circumstances and this means I'm not always as good as I want or need to be - if that makes ant sense. Sometimes I'm real and sometimes i wear a mask.
3 people like this
@innertalks (23745)
• Australia
9 Nov 17
@Shiva49 It seems this was one of the rare ones I missed earlier.
In a lot of ways, you are right about needing to unravel life's mystery in our own way to make our own sense out of it, but at times we need to sacrifice our way, for the sake of connecting to others. Especially in a marriage, such give and take can be a good thing sometimes, I think.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (28397)
• Singapore
8 Jul 16
Thanks, we are always enriched if we have the right attitude.
I have been having long discussions over the years with my good friend Steve Marshall who is also from Australia. He picks holes in my posts/responses to see whether I am consistent. We rarely miss any of our posts and comments and the interactions go on and on!
I can say I am honest at all times and treat others the same way, be they millionaires or paupers, as I have no axe to grind!
Life is intriguing and we need to unravel its mystery our own way. Being real helps a lot as I like to say - if we tell the truth we don't have to remember what we said! siva
3 people like this
I can see from your posts that you are a serious thinker , my friend . @innertalks (23745)
• Australia
9 Nov 17
@Shiva49 Our heart connects deeply to love when we connect deeply to it.
It is a decision of our mind sometimes to do this, and at other times, it is a choice not of our mind, but more of a reaching out to ourselves which grabs us back into our hearts, when our mind has had us seemingly captured by our negative thoughts, be they depressed ones, or fearful ones, or what.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (28397)
• Singapore
8 Jul 16
We have our own life experiences and passions.
What we share from our hearts is what matters.
Many are able to relate to others' daily lives and are keen to know about them and where they come from.
I like to think aloud about life in general rather philosophically and enjoy the interaction therefrom.
So each has own strengths that they should eventually enrich the site - siva
3 people like this
@epiffanie (11336)
• Australia
7 Jul 16
If we are truthful to ourselves, it will come across our articles.. I am here not expecting others to agree with my opinions.. And I don't mind being criticised for what I believe in.. I learn more about myself from those who oppose me and I see the real me from the way I respond to them .. If I feel I need to polish up my acts and my thinking, I am willing to do my best because I want to evolve into an enlightened human being ..
3 people like this
@Shiva49 (28397)
• Singapore
8 Jul 16
Well said and nice attitude.
I have been on online sites for years now.
I have enjoyed my ride wherever it took me.
I always recall the many with whom I shared great camaraderie.
Of course, we did not agree at times but that added spice to the discussions too.
Finally it was more of whatever floated their boats was fine with me too as our life experiences differ.
I always was enriched by the interaction - siva
3 people like this
@sofssu (23660)
•
1 Jul 16
I am always me.. I enjoy being here because I don't have to be someone else or pretend to be something I am not. My husband reads most of my posts.. and has a good laugh at some.. I am not very keen on confrontation.. I move on if I don't relate to someone or some views.
5 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
3 Jul 16
It's a funny thing about people: Some might be more 'real' here than they are anywhere. Others might not be themselves at all on this site.
4 people like this
@DeborahDiane (40851)
• Laguna Woods, California
2 Jul 16
I have been on sites where the writers were very critical of each other, especially in the forum. I avoid those sites. I think I come across the most like myself on MyLot, because we can discuss our person beliefs ... which I try to avoid when I write on my retirement blog or on The Daily Voice News.
5 people like this
@Shiva49 (28397)
• Singapore
4 Jul 16
Yes, we should keep in mind what the site stands for and not upset the apple cart of harmony built over time.
At another site the knives were out, with even non-members jumping into the fray, at the slightest sign of disagreement. Then it was free for all and took a while for the dust to settle in.
I have written over seven hundred posts in various sites and on occasional times when emotions trumped reason, I let go. There was one worthy who needled me saying my views did not make sense and I told him "thanks for trying to make sense" and then moved on - siva
2 people like this
@Daelii (5619)
• United States
9 Nov 17
I'm me and I feel like the words on a screen should be a reflection of who I am. I try to remain positive though I've struggled with depression big time (a combination of post-partum depression and just feeling lost when it comes to overcoming struggles). So finding positive here, helps me find balance in the me physical too.
3 people like this
@Shiva49 (28397)
• Singapore
9 Nov 17
Whenever I feel low in spirits I think of those who have nothing, do not even know where their next meal is going to come from, yet remain happy and even contented.
I look for a ray of light even when things look pretty gloomy and hopeless. Then I abide by the rule "this too will pass, water under bridge soon" siva
3 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
9 Nov 17
You said it the best and I agree 100% Sir.
2 people like this
@innertalks (23745)
• Australia
3 Jul 16
Who or what is the real me, is it my higher self, or is it me (my lower self), or what would I define this "real me" as being from "my" perspective view?
From our viewing of our self, our mind is usually seen as the real us, and we try to better this, and to grow it into more matching who our heart knows that we are.
We know in our mind that we can be even better than our just being our mind self though.
We can live from our higher self, or from our our soul whilst living here in our physical body self, by our not limiting our self to be only our mind's representation of us as our self.
"How close is the real me to how I come across here?"
The real me is the one coming across here, but how I come across anywhere else but here, is a long way from the real me.
@Shiva49 (28397)
• Singapore
4 Jul 16
Agreed Steve, the real me is not easy to identify though I try to reflect who I am at all times.
I try to fulfill the yearnings of my soul through my mind, thinking, and action.
Otherwise my life is wasted and I am deluding myself.
I live my moments uplifted by fulfilling the desires of not only me but keeping society and the creator in mind. I never stray from the path of my inner knowing. I try to stay in tune with the universal spirit of creation.
Of course, we are human and may not know our faults but we can stick to truth as we understand them.
I feel I have succeeded to stand by my core beliefs here - siva
2 people like this
@innertalks (23745)
• Australia
4 Jul 16
@Shiva49 It sounds like you are a "soul" having a human experience then, rather than a human trying to have a "soul" experience.
It must take a fair amount of courageousness to not stray from the path of your inner knowing, not only that though, it must also take a fair amount of awareness to even know this path, enough to know when you are being tempted to leave it.
You really are your own man. There is plenty to admire in you for that.
2 people like this
@innertalks (23745)
• Australia
4 Jul 16
@Shiva49 You have been like this for a while, even when you were working.
I wonder if you had been unemployed, and struggling, if you could have become like this so quickly. Having our basic needs being met does allow us to have more energy to pursue being our higher self I suspect, at least in some cases that is, in other cases, as you would know in India, many religious giants were largely penniless, and this didn't stop them from being themselves, being true to themselves, and living the life that they wanted to live, or were perhaps destined to live.
2 people like this
