How Do You Eat Chili Dogs?

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You may disagree with me but I feel that chili dogs are best eaten with a knife and fork. Yes, I understand the sheer joy of eating something that is guaranteed to drip all over you--especially if you're wearing a giant bib. That can be fun I suppose. But when you're not making a big mess you can focus exclusively on the food in a mindful and civilized way. You can enjoy that delicious, meaty, cheesy, oniony flavor without having chili drippings all over your face. Sometimes when you order a chili dog at a baseball game and you ask for a knife and fork the food vendor will look at you like you're some kind of terrorist or something. Then they hand you a plastic knife and fork. No thanks. There is already enough plastic clogging this planet. Sometimes the situation calls for eating chili dogs with one's hands, letting the chili drip where ever it may. Have you ever tried to catch a foul ball while eating a chili dog? Knives and forks won't help you in that situation.