I am a loner. There are good loners and bad loners. I am a good loner.
@lookatdesktop (27156)
Dallas, Texas
April 7, 2018 8:35am CST
I don't get out much. I have a tendency to like to do things right here where I am living. I don't enjoy getting all dressed up to get out and drive to wherever. Actually I hate driving a car. I hate traffic. I live where traffic is 24/7 and loud and fast and hard.
Thanks to the world wide web, social media and YouTube and Hulu and Amazon, I am living a virtual existence more than a 3-D life.
Sometimes I spend way too much time online. And then again, that is okay. Because I am pretty much a loner.
The trouble with the stereotype behind the nature of lone wolves like me, more like a cave man, from the age of Cro-magnum times, I know there is a lot of negative stuff out there about loners. Here is one such article written about the subject of being solitary and a loner in today's modern age.
Have a good day here at myLot. It's my lot and it's yours too. 
Loners are pitied in our up-with-people culture. But the introvert reaps secret joy from the solitary life.
13 people like this
16 responses
@mlgen1037 (29882)
• Manila, Philippines
7 Apr 18
So how do you determine which one is a good loner and the other is a bad loner? Just curious.
4 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
A bad loner gets angry when you try to start a conversation with them, in a public place like the supermarket. LOL I like to talk to people when I get out shopping and sometimes people will be kind and pleasant to me and talk back. But sometimes I run into a bad one, who when I say anything, either acts grumpy or turns back to me. Okay I can deal with that because for every one bad loner, I can find a hundred good loners to talk to.
3 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
8 Apr 18
@mlgen1037 , Yep. You sound like a good loner.
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
Knowing why I am alone, and being alone on my own terms is fine but if I had to be all alone and confined and not given access to the world around me would be a terrible way to live. There are people who do not adjust to going from a large family a nuclear family structure to a time when everyone gets older, moves out and gets married and travels a thousand or more miles away and stops calling. That hurts. It really hurts a lot. It's like they no longer acknowledge me.
3 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
@nela13 , I aldo enjoy family and friends at certain times.
3 people like this
@nela13 (59365)
• Portugal
7 Apr 18
@lookatdesktop I understand your points, I like to be alone but I also like to have my family and friends around me.
3 people like this
@1hopefulman (45111)
• Canada
7 Apr 18
I can be happy when I'm alone and when I'm with people. If I were on a desert island, I would prefer a few people than being alone. I don't like crowds.
3 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
That is similar to the way I am .
2 people like this
@wolfgirl569 (136091)
• Marion, Ohio
7 Apr 18
The older I get the less I want people around. Always was happy being by myself. But the more I see the less I want anything to do with the rest of the world.
2 people like this
@wolfgirl569 (136091)
• Marion, Ohio
7 Apr 18
@lookatdesktop Need sadly money in this world. But we have enough to keep the bills paid which is all that matters.
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
@wolfgirl569 , and that is good. I hope you have enough for ice cream and coffee too.
1 person likes this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
You have your husband and your pets and your private land. What else would a person need or want?
1 person likes this
@just4him (323168)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
8 Apr 18
I can relate to that article. I'm a loner. I always was. I even married a loner. There are times when I want to be social, but those times are few and far between. If I need to go shopping, I do it when I'm already out, such as after the pool in the early morning. Otherwise, I don't go anywhere. I even talk myself out of going places.
I don't mind going to events with a lot of people. I don't know them, and they don't affect me, so I can enjoy the event without being social in it.
3 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
8 Apr 18
This makes perfect sense. In a crowd a person can basically become invisible.
3 people like this
@just4him (323168)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
9 Apr 18
@lookatdesktop Yes, they can. People often look at me funny when I tell them I do things by myself, not with other people, as though a person needs to do things with others all the time. I learned early in life to take care of my own needs and not depend on someone else to do things with me or for me.
1 person likes this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
There are ways to create a personal space, even in a crowded office. I had my very own cubicle. LOL
3 people like this
@YrNemo (20254)
•
7 Apr 18
@lookatdesktop I avoided the staff room so far. Let hope it keeps that way.
I avoided the staff room so far. Let hope it keeps that way.2 people like this
@PurnaSharma (2562)
• Guwahati, India
7 Apr 18
I didn't go to the link but glad to know that you are a good loner. Mostly such people distract from their path and becomes bad loner.
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
Without proper mentoring and guidance by someone with more experience and wisdom a good loner might eventually become what I refer to as a bad loner. But not always. Sometimes solitude, like those Tibetan Monks, live this way as to be closer to God.
2 people like this
@noni1959 (13067)
• United States
8 Apr 18
I'm an introvert and could be called a loner. I prefer doing things alone and at my own pace. I don't watch a lot of TV or spend a lot of time on the internet. I have a couple friends I'll meet up with occasionally. They live about four hours away so it works out perfect for me.
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
8 Apr 18
You have a good way of managing your social time.
1 person likes this
@innertalks (23746)
• Australia
9 Apr 18
I am not really a loner, as I feel connected to oneness, and yet it is this very connection which makes me feel as lonely as God must be at times.
I can relate to nobody, not even to myself. I am more an alien!!
Why?
To be alone is to be in isolation, mixed in with nothing, but to not be alone is to me mixed in with everything, but never isolated.
What I think that what I must be however is to accept the mix of oneness, but maintain the part in the mix that I am too, so to be lonely in the crowd, but crowded in my loneliness.
Photo Credit:
The photo used here is sourced from the free media site: pixabay.com
"We are all so much together, but we are all dying of loneliness."
Albert Schweitzer, (1875 to 1965), a German philosopher.
@innertalks (23746)
• Australia
9 Apr 18
@lookatdesktop Yeh, that's just me. Intense in my intensement...LOL...
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (28406)
• Singapore
9 Apr 18
@innertalks The quote is more poignant now.
We can connect with the world but the loneliness is accentuated due to technology.
I find more people working from home and prefer to order food to be delivered home.
Even when out on the streets they are glued to their mobile devices especially in Asia - siva
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (28406)
• Singapore
7 Apr 18
I am not a loner nor an extrovert - maybe alternate!
I prefer to be at home but enjoy meeting people too though do not engage in long conversations.
I like to help people in need and get fulfillment thereby.
I like the middle path. Even when I am alone I am never lonely! siva
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
I am not completely alone. For the most part, my wife fills the gap of loneliness and is my forever companion and life partner. I have always had my brothers and sisters to call or visit when I am in the mood to do either.
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
8 Apr 18
@Shiva49 I am proud of you for this and many other reasons. You are a truly good soul.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (28406)
• Singapore
8 Apr 18
@lookatdesktop That applies to me too - my wife is with me most of the time.
We prefer to go out together whenever we can - siva
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
8 Apr 18
I like not having to worry. For sure. Any time any day or night. I like it when there is nothing on my mind but the music and the stars and the smell of out door cooking.
As to your comment. I see you are indeed a true loner.
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
8 Apr 18
Thanks. I might, when I loose 10 pounds first. At any rate, yea. I would like to try an Italian restaurant and go all out one day.
2 people like this
@db20747 (43419)
• Washington, District Of Columbia
8 Apr 18
@lookatdesktop Now ya talkin'!!!!!!
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
8 Apr 18
I know you are a good loner like me.
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
Yes, when being is alone is your own chosing. that is the only way being alone really works for me. I sometimes desire to mingle with a small group, but never a large crowd. I would never go to watch a game but prefer to watch in solitude or with a very small group of familiar friends, at home and can focus on both the game and the conversations that take place during that time.
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
@Courage7 That is for the most part my main point.
2 people like this
@Courage7 (19626)
• United States
7 Apr 18
@lookatdesktop I can do any or all scenarios but as you say, I choose not to.
2 people like this
@maezee (41985)
• United States
7 Apr 18
I agree. Total stigma. I am also a loner but i do a lot of things by myself! Nothing wrong with being indeoendent. I know some friends who literally wont do anything alone -even little things like going to the gym. I actually enjoy the solitude!
2 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
I enjoy good exercise but I would not enjoy going to a public gym. I don't like having to compare myself to those who are really good at getting into shape. I would feel easily intimidated and would quickly return to doing my solitary walks and stationary bike or treadmill at my home if so inclined.
1 person likes this
@lookatdesktop (27156)
• Dallas, Texas
7 Apr 18
Yea. I know. But I like Magnum better. LOL
1 person likes this
