Hubby went to sit in the car instead of spending time with me
By Lena Kovadlo
@lovebuglena (43077)
Staten Island, New York
November 8, 2019 11:30am CST
Hubby usually ends work at 9 pm on Thursdays, unless he gets held up. It wasn't even nine o'clock yet, but almost there, when I heard someone opening the door. I didn't necessarily freak out but I did ask "who is there?" because I did not expect hubby home yet and my dad would never come and open the door himself unless he tells me he is coming first (though he did do it once). It turned out to be hubby. He must have left work earlier.
He came just in time though as I had just gotten back from the Russian store with some cooked chicken to go along with our truffle fries we had left over from the restaurant we went to Wednesday, tomatoes and avocado for a salad I was gonna make, and two danishes for tea.
After we finished eating the actual dinner (tea was later) hubby went to sit in his car and he was there for probably forty minutes or so. I was rather upset about it. Since he hadn't seen me all day, I'd think he'd want to spend time with me instead of sitting in his car listening to the NFL game on the radio, vaping, and whatever else he was doing. Apparently not. If he wanted to watch the game he could've watched it on TV, which he was actually doing while we were eating. He didn't have to go to the car for that.
7 people like this
7 responses
@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
8 Nov 19
And you would be right to be upset. I was upset. But unfortunately, that doesn't change anything. Doubt this "hobby" of his will vanish any time soon.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Nov 19
@LindaOHio Sometimes I call him lol and tell him to come home... I try not to go to the car, especially if he is there for a long time, because I will be mad as hell and it won't be pretty when I go to the car.
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@LindaOHio (156276)
• United States
8 Nov 19
@lovebuglena Have you ever gone out to the car and asked him to come inside and keep you company?
@moffittjc (118449)
• Gainesville, Florida
9 Nov 19
I am sorry to hear that, especially after you two had such a nice time on Wednesday for your anniversary.
@moffittjc (118449)
• Gainesville, Florida
11 Nov 19
@lovebuglena But you guys rode in the car together, right? So when you got home, you got out of the car and went into the house, and he stayed out in the car?
@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Nov 19
@moffittjc We rode in the car together. When we got home, first we stayed in the car together but then I went home and he remained in the car.
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@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Nov 19
Yesterday, he came home from work and we went out to dinner. After coming home from the restaurant at around midnight, he remained in the car instead of going home. And he was there for at least half an hour. I wasn't happy about that.
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@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
8 Nov 19
I know. It makes me sad when he does this. Though sometimes a bit angry, especially if he is there for a very long time. Once he was in the car for like two hours.
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@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Nov 19
He's done it before. 
We came home from dinner last night, it was already midnight, and instead of going home he sat in his car for probably half an hour, if not more. To me, it disrespectful to sit in a running car that late when people around you are probably sleeping.
We came home from dinner last night, it was already midnight, and instead of going home he sat in his car for probably half an hour, if not more. To me, it disrespectful to sit in a running car that late when people around you are probably sleeping.1 person likes this
@PrincessREL (339)
•
9 Nov 19
Have you tried talking to him about it? I think if he knew it upset you then he probably wouldn't do it. You could maybe suggest that after he has his alone time then he could spend some time with you. Try not to approach him with hostility because that will push him away. If you come across as respectful and supportive of what he wants then he is more likely to see time with you as more of a priority.
@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
10 Nov 19
Well, I told him before that I am not a fan of him sitting in the car, especially for a long time, but he does it anyway. Same for vaping in the house. I ask him not to do it but he does it anyway. He either goes somewhere I can't see him do it or sometimes does it right in front of me.
1 person likes this
@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Nov 19
@PrincessREL He used to smoke but then switched to vaping. It isn't much better in my opinion. Maybe even worse because you can sit there and vape non-stop. He is showing no signs that he is planning to stop anytime soon, if at all.
@PrincessREL (339)
•
10 Nov 19
@lovebuglena I see, so it's mainly because hes wanting to vape and you dont neccesarily want him doing that. My first instinct was to advise you of a compromise of some kind with him but vaping is so dangerous that I wouldn't like him doing it either even though I'm not sure that's your reason for not liking it.
You could tell him that life is so short and you would rather spend what little time you have on this earth with him instead of spending so much time apart. When you are no longer here then he will wish he spent more time with you and you dont want him living with that kind of regret.
That might get him to think a little bit lol
Doesnt hurt to try
@isweartokira (3465)
• United States
10 Nov 19
oh that's rude :( boys will be boys. my boyfriend does it sometimes, spends time in the garage or his car. I don't think they mean in a bad way (at least I hope not) but if that's how they unwind, sometimes you just have to let them. hopefully it doesn't happen again or you can at least talk to him about it.
@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Nov 19
He goes to sit in the car on a regular basis. Sometimes he is there for like twenty minutes or so. Sometimes he is there close to an hour or more.
@isweartokira (3465)
• United States
11 Nov 19
@lovebuglena I would definitely talk to him about it, that's not fair to you
@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
11 Nov 19
@isweartokira He is not going to stop sitting in the car no matter what I say.
@lovebuglena (43077)
• Staten Island, New York
8 Nov 19
Not to me that is for sure. Maybe he sees nothing wrong with that.
1 person likes this
