Coming Alive, but I Still Have my Moments
By DianneN
@DianneN (254926)
United States
November 23, 2019 9:13am CST
It’s been a very tough time for me since losing our beloved Doodles the cat, but keeping busy is helping a little bit.
A few days after Doodles left our family forever, I had so many things that needed to be done. I ordered contact lenses, chose and ordered eye glasses, had an emergency eye doctor appointment for flashing in my eye, had a freckle removed by my dermatologist, went shopping with my husband, had a manicure and pedicure, had a massage, got a new hair style, read two books, went on our Friday night date night, had the cleaning lady scour our house and we helped, had a bazillion texts and phone calls, visits from friends and neighbors, dinner here with our younger son, almost daily visits by him, too, and finally, the best of all, last night’s date night.
Our son invited us to his beautiful home for cocktails and dinner for a very special Friday date night. He made me that beautiful martini.
Now I am preparing to host a large group of family for our Thanksgiving dinner next Thursday. All this is helping me come alive.
37 people like this
36 responses
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
23 Nov 19
What a way to be twins! I believe it. They were concerned it was a detached retina, but I’m fine, thank goodness. I do have to return for another appointment to be examined again just to be sure.
Enjoy your martini tonight! I may have one, too.
2 people like this
@amitkokiladitya (171988)
• Agra, India
23 Nov 19
You will soon get over the grief even if the loss is irreplacable.
3 people like this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
23 Nov 19
@amitkokiladitya I’m trying. It’s so hard. Going outside to visit his grave as I do every day.
3 people like this
@BelleStarr (61463)
• United States
23 Nov 19
Sounds like you have had a lot to keep busy with, it does help to keep you from thinking too much about it. 
2 people like this
@BelleStarr (61463)
• United States
24 Nov 19
@DianneN No but it is something I have done quite a bit in the last months so you are not alone.
2 people like this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
23 Nov 19
It’s good to be feeling a little better, but I still break out crying even when I’m out and about.
Thank you. I spent the afternoon making up a menu, choosing recipes, and made a shopping list. Most of the main things have been bought and ordered.
1 person likes this
@just4him (323168)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
23 Nov 19
@DianneN That's great you have them bought or ordered and you have everything under control for the big Thanksgiving meal.
I'm certain it will happen for a while. I know how much you loved Doodles with the way you talked about him and spoiled him. 
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (169534)
• United States
23 Nov 19
Life draws us back, even when we are distant and mourning. I am glad you are taking care of yourself.
2 people like this
@snowy22315 (209108)
• United States
23 Nov 19
Sometimes staying busy is the best medicine. I am glad you have lots to do.
2 people like this
@wolfgirl569 (135944)
• Marion, Ohio
23 Nov 19
Glad to hear you are starting to do better. The house will never feel the same again. But it time it will feel better.
2 people like this
@RasmaSandra (98072)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
24 Nov 19
I am glad you are coming out of that terrible funk. I know you miss him but I can tell you from experience he is around because he loved you so much. Also, he is having a grand time being young again and chasing those butterflies up above. Virtual hugs to you
2 people like this
@mlgen1037 (29882)
• Manila, Philippines
23 Nov 19
Dianne! I’m so happy to see you here again. How are you?
2 people like this
@mlgen1037 (29882)
• Manila, Philippines
23 Nov 19
@DianneN that’s good. Don’t worry, we’re here for you.
2 people like this
@Michellekidwell (29953)
• Sonora, California
24 Nov 19
I am sorry for the loss of your fur baby!
2 people like this
@toniganzon (77261)
• Philippines
25 Nov 19
I am happy to hear this. Keeping myself busy helps a lot when I am going through something. But of course the moment night time comes or when I'm alone, I still have that moment too.
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (77261)
• Philippines
25 Nov 19
@DianneN I know your husband is there to comfort you anyway.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
25 Nov 19
@toniganzon He’s been so wonderful to me, and I know he’s hurting, too.
1 person likes this
@Tampa_girl7 (54730)
• United States
25 Nov 19
@DianneN yes, my sleeping pattern has been all out of whack.
1 person likes this
@JohnRoberts (109841)
• Los Angeles, California
23 Nov 19
The old adage of keeping busy is true.
2 people like this
@Hannihar (130150)
• Israel
24 Nov 19
@DianneN
That is very understandable that it is very very hard for you to lose Doodles. I know what that is like. I lost a dog and a cat and I loved them both so much. You can keep yourself busy but when you have moments to yourself you will think about Doodles. How is your younger son doing without Doodles?
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
25 Nov 19
@Hannihar I still have dreams of Doodles. You are right in that everyone mourns in their own way. I have been hit so hard because I am so sensitive. It’s difficult being in the house without him and trying to change old habits.
Our son had a great time, and I’m so happy for him. We will never forget Doodles or our other pets, and all we need is more time to grieve and get on with living.
I’m relieved that poor Doodles is no longer in discomfort and pain. It killed me when I heard him moaning.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
23 Nov 19
I would have preferred to stay in bed crying for weeks and weeks, but my husband made me return to the living. I just returned from visiting the graves of the kitties and here I am, all weepy again. It will take time to adjust.
My hairstyle is shorter and wedged in the back. My husband and son hate short hair on women.
2 people like this
@LindaOHio (222728)
• United States
23 Nov 19
I know you're still hurting; but I'm glad you're keeping busy. Having a large family gathering will certainly take up your time and thoughts. Thinking of you often and sending lots of hugs. BTW, we'd all like to see your new hairstyle.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
23 Nov 19
Keeping busy has helped. My husband made the appointment with the dermatologist for me and made me leave the house for my own good. He came with me, then took me shopping and out to dinner. He’s sad over Doodles, too, but men seem to be less emotional basket cases than women.
Perhaps some day in the near future.
3 people like this
@DianneN (254926)
• United States
23 Nov 19
@LindaOHio My son is like your husband, but is having difficulty talking about Doodles and Kuma right now.
Yes, I know it gets easier, and we talk about our other fur babies all the time and have some good laughs, Right now, it’s still too soon to talk much about Doodles in that way. I’m still stuck on the sudden loss of him and dealing with that.
Thanksgiving will help. It’s my favorite holiday. Also, going to Florida where Doodles has never been and seeing Orville the osprey should help immensely.
Thanks so much for being such a loving friend to me.
2 people like this
@LindaOHio (222728)
• United States
23 Nov 19
@DianneN My husband still cries over our lost fur babies; but he's very emotional these days. Hang in there. You know that it never goes away; but it does get a little easier. We talk about the good times with our fur babies just about every day.
2 people like this
