My friend's birthday surprise. No one said "Thank you" to me. Part Three....

Perth, Australia
April 22, 2021 7:10am CST
So anyway, we all sat and spoke for a long time which was great. Learned a lot about each other, shared stories, fears, phobias, happy things, a lot of things were spoken about. *It was getting close to dinner time so we went out not too far away from the resort to get dinner. Jessica ended up grabbing a burger, Phoenix got herself a burrito. Cheri wanted these nachos so I told her I would get her the meal and a drink as that was my plan anyway, to pay for a birthday dinner. Ordered it, I paid for it....no thank you. Again, I thought "Maybe after she finishes dinner she will say thank you." Dinner was eaten. Her drink had been drunk. Nothing. No thank you. *We went back to the resort, settled back in and began speaking to each other again. We were all having a really nice time having some laughs. Later I hinted to the two girls that we should bring out the birthday cake which Cheri didn't know about. We brought out the cake, sang "Happy Birthday." Each had slices of the cake. Nothing. No thank you. *Later on, Cheri and I sat outside while she had a smoke. I asked her if she was having fun and she said "Yes I am and I really appreciate everything you've done." This is one of my questions to you. She said she appreciated it but everything else I stated in Part One, Part Two and things I've stated here, was I still entitled to a "thank you"? Or is saying "I appreciate it" the same thing? At the same time, if I never asked if she was having fun, was she going to eventually tell me she appreciated it? ****photos is of the birthday cake I bought for Cheri****
10 people like this
7 responses
@LadyDuck (454979)
• Switzerland
22 Apr 21
This cake is beautiful and I am sure it was also very good. I think you should speak to Cheri. Sit down with her, tell her that "you hope she appreciated, as you felt embarrassed, thinking to have done something wrong, as she never thanked you for the birthday party" I think this must be cleared.
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
30 Apr 21
@LadyDuck Thank you, it sure was good! I only had a little bit of it as chocolate at the moment makes me cough due to whatever I got from the children....again! I will give it some time, as I'm still getting to know her. So far every time I have bought her drinks and / or lunch when out, she's never thanked me. I don't intend to do anything else for her but if there is any more occasions where I help her out in some way and I don't get a "thank you" then I think I will have to speak up politely about it.
@LadyDuck (454979)
• Switzerland
1 May 21
@VivaLaDani13 I am so sorry that chocolate makes you cough... I wonder if it's just one of the ingredient to which you are mildly allergic. I think you should have a talk with this girl, I know it is not easy, but you should politely ask her if no one in her family taught her that the minimum you can do when you receive a favor is to say "thank You". You could tell her that it's not to criticize, but it's because in life she needs to learn a bit of manner or she will be rejected by people. It's another favor that you are doing to her.
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
1 May 21
@LadyDuck All good. Nah it's because of the colds / viruses I've been getting from the children. I'm quite a big chocolate eater but once these colds started, I just cannot have chocolate or ice cream or I go into a coughing fit but once my cold is completely gone then I am fine again. I agree with you. If or when, the time comes, I can speak to her politely about it. I am almost certain she will hear me speak my feelings out. She may not be great with manners but I know she's good being the "mother type" figure when it's time.
1 person likes this
@m_audrey6788 (58487)
• Germany
22 Apr 21
I think you should talk with them about your feelings because for them being happy enough is just it. It is sad to have friends like that. Who just appreciate you but not say anything. Well. I guess, actions speaks louder than words. Maybe they will show it to you but not saying it
1 person likes this
• Germany
22 Apr 21
@VivaLaDani13 You know what is best. Get well soon
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
26 Apr 21
@m_audrey6788 Thank you. Getting there.
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
22 Apr 21
@m_audrey6788 I think you're right about having a talk with them. A calm talk just to express my feelings. I think I'm feeling scared to though. Maybe I can try later. I wonder that too. Maybe actions but not sure. I will just continue to be their friend but also observe over time their behaviour.
1 person likes this
• Portugal
22 Apr 21
I'm happy that she said to you that she appreciated everything you did but if I was her I would for sure say: Thank you so much, it meant a lot to me. You are an amazing friend.After saying that I would give you a hug. I think that it would be a normal reaction of a true friend after all the efforts you did to make her birthday memorable.
1 person likes this
• Portugal
12 May 21
@VivaLaDani13 I totally understand you. Once that she didn't have that reaction I really hope that on your birthday she can also make a nice surprise to you. Even if it's not a big party like you did for her but do something nice for you. For sure you deserve it I think everyone would dream to have a friend like you. Honestly you did so much for her to have an amazing day
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
13 May 21
@sweetloveforeve Well I won't lie, if she didn't even say Happy Birthday to me, I would feel pretty upset. I don't expect her to match what I did, even a card would make me happy. If not that, then at least a "Happy Birthday" message from her. aww seriously thank you so so very much! What you said made me feel good!
• Perth, Australia
30 Apr 21
@sweetloveforeve That is how I feel to be honest. I felt something else like a hug or saying "thank you" would have made me feel more appreciated.
1 person likes this
• Midland, Michigan
27 Apr 21
I would say her saying she appreciated it was her way of saying thank you. And when she said the different things about each gift that may also have been here way of thanking you even though the words didn't come out.
1 person likes this
• Midland, Michigan
4 May 21
@VivaLaDani13 not everyone is taught manners. And that appears to be a problem the world over as someone else here was talking about the same thing.
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
4 May 21
@MarshaMusselman That is true. And I am not surprised others are talking about it.
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
30 Apr 21
@MarshaMusselman That is possible. Though, when buying her dinner and drinks that night, she didn't say anything at all. No comments, no "thank you" so unsure what to think at the moment.
1 person likes this
@DocAndersen (54413)
• United States
22 Apr 21
notciing and calling out what you did, that is a form of thankyou, not the best form but a form.
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
30 Apr 21
@DocAndersen I can only agree with you on that.
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
30 Apr 21
@DocAndersen I bet!
1 person likes this
@DocAndersen (54413)
• United States
30 Apr 21
@VivaLaDani13 those are my favorite words. I agree with you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1 person likes this
@Starkinds (32710)
• India
22 Apr 21
beautiful cake my dear
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
22 Apr 21
@Starkinds Thank you.
1 person likes this
@Starkinds (32710)
• India
23 Apr 21
@VivaLaDani13 welcome dear
1 person likes this
@jobelbojel (34731)
• Philippines
1 May 21
Second to "I'm sorry" being the hardest words to say is "thank you". Maybe Cheri is shy to tell you that she is thankful. Okay, I take back what I said on part two. She said appreciate. I think that was the least she can say and her way to thank you is to appreciate everything you have done.
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
1 May 21
@jobelbojel I don't know. I mean she isn't a shy girl at all. She can easily speak loudly to strangers and says whatever she feels like saying. She's an extrovert. She did say that she appreciated it after I asked her if she was having a good time. But still, other days way before her birthday I've bought her lunches and drinks and helped paid for fuel for her car, she never said thank you then either.