Bad times and relationships. Over expectation
@aninditasen (18198)
Raurkela, India
June 15, 2023 5:51am CST
My husband suffered a lot and for nearly a month before his death. We were struggling to save him. My sons and me handled everything thing with no relatives help, excepting one in Kolkata where he was being treated. Everyone stayed away with the plea of the pandemic.
We lost him. I went into depression, developed heart problems and gradually gathered courage to move on in life.
These relatives who had turned away their faces when I was in distress want my attendance when they are in trouble. Don't you think this is over expectation? Are their troubles more important than mine? Or is blue blood running in their veins that being a heart patient I should be doing all the running about? Really some people are too selfish to be compassionate.
9 people like this
10 responses
@Juliaacv (56342)
• Canada
15 Jun 23
You are a very caring and compassionate person.
Those that turned their backs on you and your family in your time of need, should not expect you to help out in their time of need. Those wounds cut very deep. I am sorry that you are experiencing this.
3 people like this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
15 Jun 23
That's surprising. Some relatives think that exploiting people is their birth right.
2 people like this
@Juliaacv (56342)
• Canada
16 Jun 23
@aninditasen My Dad used to have a saying, your friends you can pick and your relatives you are stuck with. I suppose that saying can be used with those relatives.
2 people like this
@Juliaacv (56342)
• Canada
16 Jun 23
@aninditasen Sometimes this is how we learn how not to behave.
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
16 Jun 23
They are using my younger son and brother to push me to go there and help them. I have to be firm to guard my health.
2 people like this
@Jenaisle (16568)
• Philippines
16 Jun 23
I'm so sorry for the loss of your husband and everything that you went through. In my opinion in your state of health, it would be impractical and unhealthy for you to be exhausting yourself. You owe them nothing. So, don't force yourself to do their bidding. Let them have a taste of their own medicine.
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
16 Jun 23
Yes, they should sail their own canopy and know where to stop.
1 person likes this
@RebeccasFarm (91297)
• United States
15 Jun 23
It sounds like they absolutely have no care for you. I am sorry they are so cruel. RIP and I am sorry for the loss of husband and your heart problems.
This is the same for me here and why I have no one now.
Only my son really.
This is the same for me here and why I have no one now.
Only my son really.1 person likes this
@RebeccasFarm (91297)
• United States
16 Jun 23
@aninditasen I understand this Anindita and I am so glad you have your elder son to care about you. Of course he is worry for you in your place. He is a good son.
He is a good son.1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
16 Jun 23
I know what kind of relatives they are and have therefore decided to stay away from them. I too only my elder son with whom I am now at Kolkata. He too is upset as he fears if something happens to me he'll be in trouble.
1 person likes this
@peachpurple (13961)
• Malaysia
16 Jun 23
This is common in asian coubtries my dear. My relatives turned away from me when my parents were seriously sick. My dad passed away due to cancer, my mom had stroke and was admitted to nursing home. Only my bro and me had to settle everything. Relatives are selfish lot, all you need to do is give them words of synpathy and thats it. No money no talk
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
16 Jun 23
I am just not contacting them because I know the moment I contact them they will start forcing me to give my services both physically and financially.
@CarolDM (203396)
• Nashville, Tennessee
17 Jun 23
Many will act differently than how we think they should. Especially family. Not how it should be but I am sorry, it happens. They are no more important than you. My friends helped me get through difficult times more often than anyone else. Thoughts are with you.
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
18 Jun 23
It's the same with me. Outsiders helped me more than my relatives.
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
24 Jun 23
@CarolDM Life is rarely peaceful to us. We have to run after peace.
1 person likes this
@CarolDM (203396)
• Nashville, Tennessee
22 Jun 23
@aninditasen Life is like that sometimes. We take what we can get and make the best of it. I wish you well.
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
16 Jun 23
I am doing that. I am careful with my diet and resting time and make it a point not to take any strain as my doctor has adviced me to do so.
1 person likes this
@prashu228 (37518)
• India
15 Jun 23
So sorry for you. We all were helpless during pandemic. Even we lost some relatives . But yes they should understand your situation now, you can tell them clearly about your health
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
16 Jun 23
They aren't contacting me directly. They are using my younger son and my brother to force me to help them. I had to tell them about my situation.
@Marilynda1225 (91126)
• United States
15 Jun 23
I don't think I'd be able to help if relatives turned their back on me in my time of need.
1 person likes this
@aninditasen (18198)
• Raurkela, India
16 Jun 23
They are inconsiderate indeed but I have to be careful. With over exertion if I fall sick it's me and my son who are going to be in trouble.
1 person likes this
