When you ask for help, what do you really want?

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When I ask for help, that is exactly what I want – someone to help me to do something. When I ask my partner for help, he often interprets this as doing it for me, and thinks it needs to be done straight away. Sometimes I will mention something that I need to do that I would like some help with, like maybe later that day or even sometime in the coming week, but often if I’m not quite ready to do whatever it is immediately, he will then just go and do it for me instead of waiting to do it together. That’s not what I wanted! But how can I complain when he is obviously trying to be helpful? Of course if I did, he would probably refuse to help in future. So I have to not ask, and just work out how I can do whatever it is without help instead. Then he just complains that I never accept help with anything! I guess this all helps me to be more self-reliant. All rights reserved. © Text copyright Fleur 2023.