Fashion and Propriety in the Victorian Age

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Offering his seat to a lady was not only expected behavior but if a gentleman didn't give up his seat to a lady this social slight could be sent to the local paper and he would be called a bounder (rude and boorish) in the community. Men were taught to keep their hands at their sides or on their legs while women put theirs on the arm of a chair, it was too suggestive otherwise. Men could not put their arms on the back of a couch unless they were setting with a family member. And, men were expected to rise each time a lady entered the room. Even chairs had certain ranks. The hostess' chair was off limits and, the best chair in the room was for the oldest or most esteemed guest. Guests often would wait to be assigned a seat. If a woman hunched up her dress to walk across a puddle her reputation would be over. Even if a bit of stocking was seen she risked being branded as immodest or brazen. This was because men of that era obsessed over ankles. Some stage performances women were allowed to some ankle however. Women wore their dresses just touching the tops of their shoes with any where from 5 to 7 petticoats. Women were to be quiet until she was spoken to and conversations were to be appropriate, not interesting. Men were supposed to talk but women needed to be quiet and aloof. Talking about illness, money or gossip was not appropriate. Women were not to take their shoes off in mixed company.