Mother-in-Law's Car Isn't Totaled so That is a Dilemma For Us
By LooeyVille
@LooeyVille (52)
United States
August 30, 2025 5:47am CST
We were hoping mother-in-law's car would be totaled after her recent at-fault car accident because we don't feel she should be driving anymore.
That was going to be the easy way to take her keys away from her.
But it's repairable. It's in the shop now and the insurance company is supposed to look at it soon.
She loves that car to a ridiculous degree and she doesn't want to lose her independence, which I understand, but she's really become a danger behind the wheel.
We're exploring next steps.
6 people like this
6 responses
@LooeyVille (52)
• United States
14h
I'm going to approach that when she has her mental status evaluation on Tuesday.
1 person likes this
@kareng (79176)
• United States
3h
@LooeyVille This was also the case with my mother. She argued with the doctor and the doctor questioned her several times and her answers were no where near the truth. She told the doctor she was still going to drive. And that is when the dr. told her that she would be in serious trouble if she got caught driving. They get flagged in the system and if caught driving face a hefty fine.
@FourWalls (78260)
• United States
10h
Is there a possibility that you could ask the police to “charge” her with impaired driving? I don’t know if mental incapacity qualifies legally as “impaired driving,” but you can always ask. You can also see if the accident report mentions her cognitive decline, which would make her uninsurable.
Oh, and does the Masonic Home have “outing” buses? I’ve noticed a bus full of people from the facility my aunt is at stopping at Chuy’s a few times recently. If they have planned outings, it might be easier for her to go out without being a problem. (Of course, that also necessitates her not wandering off…which reminds me, have you looked into getting an AirTag or “elderly tracking device” for her?)
EDIT: found this article, haven’t read it in depth to vouch for its accuracy, but this is what I’m talking about regarding a GPS tracker for her.
A GPS tracker for dementia can assist you in locating your wandering loved one and preventing dangerous emergencies. This article lists helpful products.
2 people like this
@FourWalls (78260)
• United States
3h
@LooeyVille — I certainly pray the doctor intervenes. It was quite distressing to have to go to court to stop a loved one. Even starting the process was disheartening. I hope it doesn’t come to that, because it doesn’t feel pleasant.
@LooeyVille (52)
• United States
9h
Thank you. We might "tag her." We put a location tracker on her phone already. We're getting a mental status evaluation on her Tuesday. Maybe I can convince the doctor to end her driving privileges legally.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (165572)
• United States
12h
I was hoping it would be totaled or that somehow she might not have the money for repairs.
1 person likes this
@snowy22315 (195220)
• United States
5h
I suppose it is too much to hope for that she will forget about it.
1 person likes this
@Traceyjayne (4713)
• United Kingdom
5h
It might have been better if it had been totalled I agree. It’s going to be tricky for you to persuade her to drive less as I gather from your posts she is a very determined person. Good luck x
1 person likes this
