My birthday is a week away

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My birthday is coming up December 24th. I thought I’d be spending it with hubby in Atlantic City. I’d play the slot machines a bit and celebrate my birthday by going to dinner at Gordon Ramsay’s restaurant Hell’s Kitchen. That won’t be happening however, as he chose to separate from me, something I never thought would happen. We’ve been together since 2014, married since end of 2016. It’s been almost four months since he left and it still feels surreal. Now I have to come up with something else to do on my birthday. And I don’t know what. One thing I know is that sitting home won’t do me any good. I will be going to Atlantic City for a few days the day after my birthday. My uncle and his wife are going and my mom decided that she and I should join them. Hope I get to enjoy the small getaway and not be preoccupied with thoughts of him not being there with me or the fact that he is not in my life, though still married to me. Maybe I’ll get lucky and win something. Though from past experiences even if I do win something I end up losing it all because I just want to keep on playing. Those slot machines really suck you in.