No means no, right?
By Valentina
@valherma00 (4963)
Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
July 27, 2026 7:25am CST
Or it should be? Either we are saying no to our own gender or the opposite, our No should be respected but many times, it's not in a real life.
I don't like when people, strangers additionally touch me, especially if they aren't polite and i prefer if they can explain it with words cause, we are humans afterall (i hope we are).
Well, sometimes, i let it go but sometimes, when instead of explaining to me, a hairdresser, after she was already finished with my haircut, wanted me to bend my head so i can see something, i didn't like that or her harsh touch and said to her "can you not touch me, please". She answered she has to so she can explain better but i said there is no need and i can't remember in that rush did she touch me one more time or just a light touch. She was my own gender and no is no.
She didn't apologize afterwards and after i paid, she wished me a good day and i wished her too but it was not sincere and i felt like i ran through this whole meeting when i left the hair salon. Not coming back there.
What is your experience with saying no (to people you know, strangers and others)?
6 people like this
5 responses
@Shivram59 (51378)
• India
28 Jul
I'm a man. During my college years a friend who used to touch my hands and hold them unnecessarily. Sometimes at places where we are alone, he hugged me. I felt uneasy and strictly warned him against doing such things.
1 person likes this
@Shivram59 (51378)
• India
3 Aug
@valherma00 No, it was very uncomfortable to me. I knew what he wanted from me. It was unacceptable. Very disturbing.
1 person likes this
@valherma00 (4963)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
3 Aug
this was a stranger but when friend is doing it, it's not comfortable either. i mean, it doesn't matter who does it. i hope he listened to you. 
1 person likes this
@valherma00 (4963)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
10 Aug
@Shivram59 o, i get it now. i'm really sorry. he could have told the truth, that would be more fair. yes, that's disturbing, when people think they can sue us however they want.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (124917)
• United States
30 Jul
I don’t find it weird that the hairdresser would try to tilt your head this way or that as it is very common, and almost a necessary part of the transaction. That being said, if one carefully explains beforehand you don’t like being touched then she should be very cautious in her approach. I just think it must have been so odd when her job is to touch hair on your head all of a sudden being asked to refrain from doing so. I think you both must have felt uncomfortable in the situation.
1 person likes this
@valherma00 (4963)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
10 Aug
@AmbiePam thanks. yeah and almost the minute i came in, there was also a misunderstanding cause, i thought my haircut classified as short (the length was under my ears) and i got a coupon for a short haircut but she told me vaguely, without real evidence, that my hair is medium but she didn't charge me for medium haircut. then she complained about some customers and when it was done, i realised she didn't cut my hair at the front short, according to the photo i brought in so, yes. i also asked the site where i bought a coupon to put the correct information about hair lenghts but they said they are the 3rd party. ah. in the movies, everyone is happy when they go to get a hair salon but for me, it's always different.o, well
1 person likes this
@valherma00 (4963)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
3 Aug
she was already done with my haircut but instead of using her words, like any human being, she wanted to demonstrate me but i was not having it. and she was impolite from the start. my first time there.
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (79019)
• Philippines
28 Jul
That hairdresser must have thought she was just doing her job and she knows better than you!
My hairdresser touches my head coz it's a must to see if he's doing his job right. Because sometimes, I tilt my head a bit unknowingly.
1 person likes this
@valherma00 (4963)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
3 Aug
she wanted to touch me additionally after she was already finished with my haircut. i found it unpleasant and unnecessary.
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (61643)
• United States
29 Jul
I don't allow stranger to touch me without my convent.
1 person likes this
@valherma00 (4963)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
3 Aug
she was impolite fro mthe start but she was doen and then she wanted to touch me again. no, i didn't want to. you're right.
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (91738)
• United States
27 Jul
NO should absolutely mean NO
Reminds me of a song "What Part of No Don't You Understand" can't remember who sang it though
1 person likes this
@valherma00 (4963)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
3 Aug
i should find this song. i mean, the haircut was already over and why she wanted to touch but i was not having it. yes, what part...
1 person likes this
@Marilynda1225 (91738)
• United States
4 Aug
@valherma00 It's a really old song 1992 by Lorrie Morgan and you can probably find it on YouTube
1 person likes this
@valherma00 (4963)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
10 Aug
@Marilynda1225 o, country song. i found it. thank you!
