Sometimes it's just painful to say no.

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Granted, I don't say yes to just anything, of course. No one does. I have a long-time good friend, I've known her for many years. She helped me rock babies, we worked together for a time, we've visited each other over the years when we could. We are so much alike, we could be sisters. We always talk to each other on our birthdays, or close to our birthdays, as well as other times of course. We hadn't talked in some time, today I called her to wish her a happy day tomorrow on her birthday. She told me she didn't want to tell me, but her husband is dying and Hospice is there. It's very close to the end..he's breathing and that's about it. One of their daughters just had a baby this week and can't be with her, and the other one is hoping to drive to be with her by tomorrow. She was wishing I was there with her. I felt so bad, I can't take on anymore. They are close to 500 miles from me, so it's no short trip. I feel so badly for her. Her husband was a big strapping fellow with a hearty laugh and a love for life. She says he is nearly a skeleton and unrecognizable. It hit him hard and fast, and he went downhill very quickly. All you men out there, if it's recommended you get your prostate checked, please do it. He refused to do that...only went to the doctor when he was really sick. Never for check-ups, etc. By the time they discovered the prostate cancer, it was way past time to be able to help him. She begged him to go get checked out when he first became sick but he refused. She is beyond sad and devastated. I just feel badly that she wanted me there and I can't be there for her, but I can't. I hope her one daughter can get there in time. She has a strong faith, but she will be alone. Not sure how she will manage but I know somehow that she will. We had planned on having a short visit here this winter. I hope we still can.