Wife earns more money and have higher position than husband

Malaysia
May 9, 2007 12:02pm CST
This issue happen in this modern world. Nowadays, many women have a good career and good position in the office. so, what will happen if the wives earns more money and good position than the husband? Will they also bossy and have more control in the house? Are they good wife as they are good employee in the office? Do the husband feel bad about it? Or just dont care as they can share the money?
3 people like this
22 responses
• India
9 May 07
Well adrenella nice discussion to start with.Your discussion has a slight reference to male chauvinism or male dominance.Ofcourse this happens more often in countries where traditions are strictly followed,those who have not come out of their cocoon of draconian family concepts.Its due to the petty egoism such problems arise.Hope that it doesn't arise in your family.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
10 May 07
yes cosmopolitan, i agree with you and this situation still happen in country like malaysia where egoism still strong. ...And i m lucky...my family is open-minded...
• India
10 May 07
Very nice to her from you that your family is an exception to gender discrimination in terms of money.But its a new peice of knowledge that malaysia,one of the developed south-east asian countries is gripped with the canker of dominance struggle.Thank you for marking mine as the best.Please respond to others also then only your earnings will keep increasing.
@eanna13 (133)
• United States
9 May 07
I make more than my husband now. In the begining of our marrage he made the bulk of the money. I don't beleive that the dynamics of our household has changed much. I have always been the one "in charge" LOL!
1 person likes this
• United States
9 May 07
Lol.. That's how it is with me and my husband.. Well except I've always made more money than him.
1 person likes this
@maybey (366)
• Philippines
10 May 07
The important is both of you will having a good job and working harder to share the salary of yours for the family sake. I dont think so that a higher position is change the personal interest relationships.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 May 07
I will probably make more than my hubby becasue he is military and unless he gets to officer status by time I start work, I will be the one making all the money. He is very supportive, and he seriously wants to eb a stay at home dad, but he loves to work. He does not feel liek it makes me any more important. What's mine is his and no matter what or how much I work we will still share the responsiblities. Nothing will be put on just one persons shoulders. He just wants what's best and for me to be happy. He is a strong man, because I am pain in the butt. LOl
@psyche49f (2514)
• Philippines
10 May 07
In today's ever-evolving world, it does not matter anymore who gets the higher pay or position in the family. . as long as both husband and wife play their roles well...it's only that when the wife gets bossy and superior where the problem may start. Career women now have been given opportunities to climb up the corporate ladder; men have to accept that fact. But women should also consider their husband's feelings everytime the topic on who gets the higher pay comes up, which should not be an issue unless it is really necessary. I say it would depend on those who are concerned. If this is the case, there is really no big deal. So what? I think I am now in that position, but it does not really matter. . .So husbands should not really feel bad about it. . .
@ctv101103 (861)
• Philippines
10 May 07
i am a wife and i earn more than my husband. it's been this way for years now, even before we got married. and it never became an issue between us. we both contribute to the welfare of our family. decisions are made by both of us. we agreed that what i earn is also his and what he earns is also mine. constant communication is the key.
1 person likes this
@ashar123 (2360)
• India
10 May 07
Well if wife starts earning more than husband then a bossy nature develops in her and she starts thinking that she is in command and everything must be according to her opinion which results in bad relationship between husband and wives in some cases but I have seen many husband and wives living so happily even if wife earns more.
1 person likes this
@RosieS57 (892)
• United States
9 May 07
Money can't buy you love so as long as she loves her husband she's a good wife. As far as keeping house, with two incomes they can hire a housekeeper!
@Buwahaha (20)
• United States
9 May 07
My husband say no why would I feel bad about it. Lol. Both of our checks go straight into our bank account so neither of us really see our money anyways.
1 person likes this
@anup12 (4184)
• India
14 May 07
i do not think that this is an issue at all because when we are married we are not different we are the same so it does not matter who is earning more and who is earning less.It is the respect that matters whcih one should ahve for the other.
@leselle (17)
• Philippines
11 May 07
It was never an issue between me and my husband on how much we earn for our family. what matters most is that we can sustain our family's needs. there was i time when i earned more than what my husband did, but we never encountered problems since my husband all helps in spending our income wisely. what is important is the love you have for each other, respect for each other, the family that you have made and of course your relationship to God.
• United States
10 May 07
I make more money than my boyfriend with whom I live with. I'm not happy about it though. I wish he made more money than me. Also, because I make more money than him, I feel I can get away with a lot of things. However, I wish he made more. That way I would spend less.
@thefuture (1751)
• Nigeria
10 May 07
The husband will always feel challenged when the wife earns better than him. If the wives earns more than husbands, they won't mind taking the family's responsibilities, cos they are responsible than men. That's the way I think. Thanks
@shinjiao (1465)
• China
10 May 07
Yes,now it is a trendy in this modern world.For instance,my aunty's salary is much higher than my uncle's.Though my uncle expresses that he doesn't care about her wife earns more money than him but actually,the whole family members believe that he is envy my aunty more or less.Especially,he always quarrel with my aunty for trifile things and he sometimes complain my aunty isn't a considerate wife.So I wonder he feels bad about it.
• Singapore
10 May 07
My wife currently earns more than me but it's not for the lack of paper qualifications on my part. If any, we have the same university degrees. The only thing that set us apart is luck in getting different first jobs. She's not only very understanding but also not bossy at all. She's been my pillar of support all these years. I really appreciate her.
@ellie26 (4114)
• Malaysia
10 May 07
The trend now is that both husband and wife is working. In the earlier days where the wife stays at home while the husband goes to work. During those days, men has always been the head of the family and decision maker while the wife is quietly give moral support at the back. At present time where women and men shoulder equal responsibility, I do not think why the husband should complain much. In fact, the wife shoulder more responsibility that the husband because on top of bringing in the money, she is also the housekeeper, a wife role that has not changed very much. The husband, on the other hand, should be thankful because they are no longer the sole provider and that they can lessen their pressure in settling monthly commitment. A wife can be a good wife and also a good employee if they know how to balance their time at home and at workplace.
• India
10 May 07
Hi adrenenella2007! It is very essential in this modern world that both husband and wife should earn inorder to have a comfortable life.I am a Banker by profession. My husband earns only onethird of what i earn as a Sales Supervisor which has resulted in serious inferiority complex issues with my husband and at one point he demanded that i quit my Job and sit at home and put so many restrictions on me. I preferred to walk out of him instead.
• United States
10 May 07
For 4 years I had a higher paying job than my husband did. It did not bother him at all. He was just happy that we were able to pay our bills. When you have kids your job is to provide for them and that is what we did together. My husband did not feel bad about it because we have a joint bank account and we share everything. I think that if you have the same goal and priorities that it should not matter.
• Philippines
10 May 07
I can relate to this problem because I am presently employed, with a promising career, whereas my husband has his own business. I try not to let the issue of income affect our marriage. What I do is I appreciate whatever amount he can give me at the end of the month, and proudly praise him for that. In return, he does't ask me where his income goes lol!!
@zhanizh (20)
• Philippines
10 May 07
this situation reminds me of the movie "the sTepford wives" starring nicole kidman... at the near end of the story, her husband shows how inferior he is of her... that she always is better at everything: that she runs faster, earns more money, even makes love better than him..etc..etc.. and that the only role he played was the man who holds her purse..hehe and he asks, "what does that make him".. she answers," a lucky man"..hehe (watch the movie if you haven't seen it yet.. its nice..)