If you were to get sick
By winterose
@winterose (39887)
Canada
May 28, 2007 12:40pm CST
If you were to get sick, and needed full time care for the rest of your life,
would you want to be with your family,
would you find it would be an intrusion on your family,
would you think that your family would not be able to take care of you,
would you want to be placed in a nursing home or have a nurse come to your own house?
Given that I only have one single son who is 30 years old
I don't think I would want to put the burden on his shoulders, if I were to get so sick that I could no longer care for myself.
I would either want a nurse in my own home, first choice and if that was not possible then I would want to go to a good nursing home.
what about you?
6 people like this
24 responses
@skewedsolipsism (176)
• United States
29 May 07
I often wonder what I would do if I couldn't take care of myself - that's one of my greatest fears - being old and depending on others. I won't have children and my spouse is much older than I am so I assume he wouldn't be around either. I suppose I'll have to plan in advance for some assisted living care.
2 people like this
@netbuster (99)
• India
29 May 07
My son is 20 but I already know I would not like to burden him with anything especially when I am sick. It is a frightening thought that I would be in such a state. But reality demands that I have a balanced view of how to cope with such a situation. I hope I don't have to go to a nursing home. I guess my wife and me would have to take care of each other. That is a reassuring thought.
2 people like this
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
28 May 07
If I was to get sick and needed full time care, I sure would hate to be aburden on my husband and my daughter but I would miss them so bad if I couldn't always be with them. I know how it is to take care of someone who is sick. I did it for three years once before. I think I would also have to hire a nurse in my home so my husband and daughter wouldn't have to do all of my needs. I would surely hate to go to a nursing home though. Most of them do not treat patients very well.
2 people like this
@joey_matthews (8354)
•
9 Jun 07
I would want to be with my family or as close as possible to them. I would hope if I couldn't be with them that they'd still come and see me most days or when they can.
Either wouldn't bother me aslong as they didn't forget about me. ~Joey
1 person likes this
@unica_hija777 (14)
• Philippines
29 May 07
We have to be realistic. Most problems boil down to money. Whether it's a nursing home or home care, is there some kind of insurance or financial plan to pay for this?
1 person likes this
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
29 May 07
depends where you live, they are free here in canada. You could get private care if you want to but the poor still go to decent nursing homes etc. Most families are not at home sick, with the demands of taking care of the elderly, I am not saying nobody does it, but nursing homes are more sought after.
@Marie2473 (8512)
• Sweden
29 May 07
I would like to think that my family would volenteer to help me, but i would also like to belive that I would be strong enough to say no and hire a nurse or admit myself in a home. i would not like to be a burden to anyone I love!
1 person likes this
@hmike_d (1529)
• Philippines
29 May 07
If i may suggest, it is more likely to spend time to be cared of to a good nursing home or let a nurse do the care at home. Yes, it would be a big burden to my family if they take their time to take care of time. It would make me really sick if they could put their jobs at stake just for me.
On the other hand, for us Filipinos, as we known to have closed family ties, i really don't have any idea if my family would permit myself to go to the nursing home. I am pretty damn sure, they wont let me go in there and they would insist to take care of me whatever happens.
@GuateMom (1411)
• Canada
29 May 07
Since my children are still little, I would want to be with them. I would like to think that I could still teach them things and spend time with them even if I needed full time care, but I would want a nurse so that my husband didn´t have to look after me as well as the boys.
@wifeofharvey (1156)
• United States
29 May 07
A great deal would depend on how much actual care would be needed. If I was totally bed-fast I would want to be in a nursing home, especially if my mind were gone as with Alzheimer's.
If I just needed assistance with daily living I would be happy with my family. My daughter, who is a nurse, says that she doesn't want either my husband or I in a nursing home, that she wants us with her. It's nice to know that she feels that way.
My mother in law, who will be 91, still lives alone, she has home-care helpers in twice a week [for cleaning]. Several family members live near her and are always there to take her to doctor or other appointments.
1 person likes this
@abroji (3247)
• India
29 May 07
I always pray God not to put me in such a situation. I have two daughters and two very nice sons in law. If inspite of my wish and prayer if I fell ill and need care, my daughters and their husbands will decide upon what to do. If they ask for my opinion I will ask them to admit me to a nursing home.
Thank you.
@Woodpigeon (3710)
• Ireland
29 May 07
That is something that weighs on my mind as I get older. I am the caretaker, and no one else has risen to the occassion when the chances have arisen. If I were to need permanent care for the rest of my life I don't think there is anyone in the family who would cope. My sister would do it but for many reasons that wouldn't be feasible, and my husband would be unsuitable. I would probably choose the same options as you: a nurse in my own home, first choice and if that was not possible then I would want to go to a good nursing home.
1 person likes this
@skewedsolipsism (176)
• United States
29 May 07
I often wonder what I would do if I couldn't take care of myself - that's one of my greatest fears - being old and depending on others. I won't have children and my spouse is much older than I am so I assume he wouldn't be around either. I suppose I'll have to plan in advance for some assisted living care.
1 person likes this
@shashank1986 (625)
• India
29 May 07
i hate to be a burden upon anyone...i like to be self dependent n i wonder wat'll i do if such a situtation were to come in my life...staying with family wud be just adding to their worries...it wud be better to be at nursing home rather...
wud be really the badest moments of my life n i really really wish i better not get into such a situation...
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
28 May 07
Like you I would not want to burden my Children one of the Reasons I did move
But I know for a fact if it did come to that my Children would be here pack me in the car and take me with them lol no matter how much I protest lol
@saralee1 (1983)
• United States
28 May 07
I do not know why all parents would think it would be a burden to their children, because this is not the case!If anything, if my family did not come to me to tell me what was going on,I'd be insulted, because I'd rather deal with it myself, then to have a stranger care for my welfare if I could help it. Of course, it depends on the circumstance, of course!Talk to him, and get his feelings on it. you can also hire a personal care assistant to help you out in your home as well.
I worked in a Nursing home for a few years, and let me tell you! most people who live there, do not like it. Not to mention it is expensive!
good luck to you, and God Bless!
1 person likes this
@charms88 (7538)
• Philippines
29 May 07
Given the chance, I would prefer to be with my girls. But I know they will have their own families. I had literally programmed my mind that I will grow old alone. I can have the option of checking in a nursing home myself or hired a nurse to stay with me. That's why I need to keep working right now. It is better to have a little money of my own when I turn old and cranky, LOL!
1 person likes this
@lexus54 (3572)
• Singapore
29 May 07
For my family, placing someone in a nursing home or old-age home would be a last resort. We will always have the person stay at home where his/her loved ones are, as long as it is not too burdensome for the person to be cared for. If need be, we will hire a maid or some form of nursing care for the person.
1 person likes this
@MaddMonNe (37)
• United States
29 May 07
i would want to die!
just end me!
same as if i was to go blind!
if i was to find out i had cancer or adis or anything like that i would go crazy and rob banks or something!
me needed full time care is not a way to live!
but thats just me i guess
1 person likes this
