Is it important to live close to family?

@Amstardam (1348)
United States
July 3, 2007 2:12pm CST
I live in the place I have always dreamed of living. I moved here two years ago. Problem is that it's really expensive to live here. But it has a wonderful school system, very diverse population, beautiful place and a few family members. We are thinking about moving out east to be near family. The school system is there is almost terrible, it's not exactly safe (bad side of the river, good side of the river type of thing), it's not diverse, and it's not so pretty but it's definitely a lot cheaper. How do we wage what's more important? We want to raise our child in a diverse place and have a better education but we would also like him to have a house and a big yard. We want him near family too though.
6 people like this
14 responses
• United States
3 Jul 07
I guess it's just all up to you and how you feel. I personally like being near family because if something comes up and I have to go somewhere then they will help me with my son. I also like the fact that my son will grow up and know his family members that live near us. He has some cousins that live in another state and they have never seen him before and they never come visit and we don't even know where they live. But also, you want to make sure your children are in a good school district. And you want to make sure they are in a safe place. But all in all you are the one that has to make that decision.
1 person likes this
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
4 Jul 07
I know! Why does it have to be so hard to decide??
1 person likes this
@arkaf61 (10881)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
I think it's important to be close to our family but not in terms of distance. Nowadays there is nothing so far that we can't visit, so distance becomes less and less important. My kids are quite far from the rest of the family on my side, still they are "closer" to my part of the family than to my husband's and most of them live close to us. SO you should consider what is best for you and your kids and if that takes you a bit far from your family just make sure that you guys stay " close" in terms of being in touch, share things, visit when possible and have them to visit you . Distance made no difference when it came to my kids and my family, and closeness made no difference when it came to my kids and my husband's family.
@arkaf61 (10881)
• Canada
6 Jul 07
ME and my family are really far apart. I am in Canada and my family in Portugal.We all have our busy lives and aren't always able to call or write. But we're close were it matters - inside. It's possible that sometimes we can't get in touch with each other for months in a row, but we still know that the other is there, on the other side thinking of us often. On the other hand, my husband's family lives here in Canada. In fact my in-laws live with us. But still my kids are closer to the family in Portugal than the one in here :) But I know what you mean, it's hard sometimes to be in touch. Our lives are so busy and full.
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
I think that's great that you communicate so well with your family. Unfortunately no one in my family is really a "phone person." Not that they won't pick up a phone and call but they all are so busy with jobs and families themselves.
2 people like this
@vanities (11395)
• Davao, Philippines
4 Jul 07
that was tough,,its nice to live near the family i guess..in choosing which is which in this situation you must always consider your financial capacity first and foremost..
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
Well, we live in a condo now...kinda hard for a family but not bad. We can buy a house if we move but the bad thing is property tax is so high that we'll be paying $400 or $500 a MONTH in prop. taxes alone. That's insane. So that's another factor of why we are hesistant to move.
1 person likes this
@diannebcrs (1549)
• Philippines
4 Jul 07
it's up to you but i'll tell you that all it takes is just some getting used to. it's not all too bad to live away from your family. sure you will miss them a lot. i live away from my family and i miss them like crazy at times but we always communicate so we don't miss each other that much. we email, we call, we text. i even find things better between us because we're being too pleasant with each other and there's not much room for arguments anymore. plus i was able to really appreciate them all the more. and the place you have is very nice and very promising for your kid.
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
I found it very easy to live away from my family when I wasn't married and before I had a child. I lived overseas for months at a time without talking to my family, but it's different now. I want to see my sister's kids grow up and it would be fun for my son to be able to play with them. But there are just so many negative factors about where they live.
1 person likes this
• Australia
4 Jul 07
It really depends on how much you are earning and what you want your children's values of life to be! If you are relatively rich and do not worry about the next meal or paying for your house, then for sure live in the rich place where your children are safe and receive good education. Good education is very important for their later life. HOWEVER, if you want them to love their family more, to value family more than money, then live where you are close to your family
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
I definitely don't want my children seeing their parents putting all their value's on money. That's not what's important in life. Thanks for the advice!
1 person likes this
• Australia
5 Jul 07
No problem.... in that case, i would live close to family then =D
• United States
4 Jul 07
Family is the most important thing in the world. While going back to live close to yours might have some advantages, you have to consider what will be the best thing for the new little family member. You have now started your own family, the wellbeing of the little one is the most important thing you should be considering. Why not encourage your family to move close to you?
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
Oh, they'd never do that! My brother is a lawyer with a big law frim in Chicago and his wife's family live close. My sister's husband is a physical therapist and owns and runs two of the offices that his company works for and they have two kids and one on the way. My parents moved to Wisconsin two years ago to be close to their grandkids before they knew that I was having a child. So it's not gonna happen. It's me moving out there or nothing at all.
1 person likes this
@katisaurus (1038)
• Canada
3 Jul 07
Personally I'd rather live where there's more hope in a future for my kids. But at the same time I'd want to live close to family. I'm lucky I live in a city where the education is good and it's close to family. Which is nice. Go for what's best for your family, or child(ren).
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
Me too. But I also think it would be fun for my son and sisters kids to grow up together. She has 2 boys and 1 more boy on the way! Four boys together, crazy but it would be fun!
1 person likes this
• India
4 Jul 07
At this generation education is more important than others.. Being closer to family teaches the child some good characters such as kindness, affection and most likely security..But when the child goes out in the present diverse location it interacts with many and would acquire greater knowledge..Here the future of the child should be given the highest priority..Take care and have a secure future,..
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
I completely agree with that. But I also think that I shouldn't cater to what the world says my child should be like. Family is important in this cold world.
1 person likes this
@nill_07 (1104)
• Bangladesh
4 Jul 07
No doubt it is important & essential to live close to family. It will always increase affection to each others who ever the member does not matter like.. father, mother, brather, sister, wife, husband, uncle etc. There is something to share for each member with others. It makes family bond stronger.. & it really should be.. I think so far.
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
I think it is very important too. It's just hard to weigh all the circumstances!
1 person likes this
@rhaizem (114)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
i think you should first concern how to raise your kids. you should raise them with a good environment. even though you are not close to your family you can still close to them by using techno in this age theres a lot of way to stay close even though they are far...
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
Yes and technology helps but it's definitely different than actually being there.
1 person likes this
@MLLanser (162)
• United States
3 Jul 07
Thats a tough one.... I think for me personally, I would want my kids to have the better education and I would want to live in the beautiful place. I would not want to sacrifice my kids welfare for cheaper rent or just to be closer to family. That is just me though. I know how it is to have to settle for less than what you want, and I have done it.
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
I agree. Education is really important. I don't want to have to put my child in a private school because the public school system is terrible.
1 person likes this
• India
3 Jul 07
I think it is important, very important. As a child, it gives a sense of security and love. Unfortunately, I live very far from my family for earning. I am the only financial support of my family. Now, it is not difficult for me to live far from them. But, sometimes I really feel homesick and frustrated. In such condition, I think family support can help to get out from it. If I am very frustrated and stressed, I listen to good music and speak to mom over the phone. I never tell her about my problems and we just speak normally. But, her voice helps me to get forget all my problems. It simply recharges me.
@Amstardam (1348)
• United States
5 Jul 07
That would be very hard to live away from your entire family. I'm glad you're able to talk with your mom on the phone though. :)
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Jul 07
Family is the most important thing in the world. While going back to live close to yours might have some advantages, you have to consider what will be the best thing for the new little family member. You have now started your own family, the wellbeing of the little one is the most important thing you should be considering. Why not encourage your family to move close to you?
@mr_imi (34)
• Egypt
4 Jul 07
it is not very important but u have to know all news about them