What Holds relationships For Long ?

Thiruvananthapuram, India
August 23, 2007 11:29am CST
Isn't proper and complete understanding that keep relationships strong and lively / Breaking up is quite easy ,but maintaing long standing relationships is an arduous task . It needs patienece and forbearance .
8 people like this
26 responses
@paulsy (1265)
• Philippines
23 Aug 07
Yes, I agree that a good relationship requires understanding, patience and forbearance. It is actually and give and take thing. Whatever you want to give and what you give is actually the same thing that is given back to you. If a couple love each other, they should have the will to keep their relationship strong and firm. As long and they both know, believe and accept that they belong together for life. Otherwise, if one considers the relationship temporary, then it may not hold for long at all. What matters is that the couple feel the very same way for each other, and everything else will be in place.
2 people like this
@CaitBaby (447)
• United States
23 Aug 07
I agree. Both people need to be willing to be faithful and honest, and they should be able to communicate.
@toe_ster (771)
• United States
23 Aug 07
I agree. I think it needs two people with a common goal of trying to stay together. It needs both partners to be on that same page. Relationships need love,understanding, patience, tolerance and respect. Both have to be self less and selfish in equal parts. It is a hard task to do which is why so many fail. BUt every once in a while one will make it through. And don't we all wish we were that one breakthrough?
@mamasan34 (6522)
• United States
24 Aug 07
You are so right about that. It is very important to remain understanding of each other's feelings, maintain patience and forbearance to each other. This is what keeps the marriage alive through the years. Breaking up is always the easiest way out, but where does that leave you? Alone and lonely. Always looking for something better. Which in the end is much more hard work than maintaining a loving relationship. Nothing of worth comes easily.
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6522)
• United States
8 Sep 07
thank you for the best response rating! I feel very honored to have received it.
• United States
28 Aug 07
I am not sure what you mean by proper and complete understand. I do know it does take a lot of work to keep a ralationship going for a long time. My husband and I will be celebrating our 30 wedding anniversary next month but that does not mean I completely understand him. It means that I am willing to make allowance for what he does. Some people should not be together and should split up. If there is any type of abuse then the relationship should be absolved. I do not beleive the person who is being abused needs to stay and try to work things out. There are times no matter how much patience and forbearance there is on one or both the parties parts some relationships will not workout and the two people are better off apart than together.
@dana234 (2126)
• Spain
27 Aug 07
I agree with you. Generally breaking up is easier (bearing in mind the exceptions) than trying to maintain a serious relationship. Communication between partners is one of the most important factors to keep things going. Without communication it´s difficult to understand each others feelings, ways of acting, thinking, a.s.o. If both partners are willing and patient enough to talk about their feelings, give explanations and sometimes some constructive criticism, their relationship can be a long lasting one. Dana
• Philippines
27 Aug 07
Do you really mean that breaking up is easy? Or maybe u mean, its easy to break up with your lover than keeping the relationship to be strong. Well it's both hard my dear. We're trying to keep the relationship more stronger and when have each other for such a long time then suddenly you'll wake up one morning and your breaking up with him/ her, its hard also..
1 person likes this
@ketybhagat (4125)
• India
27 Aug 07
The first law of any relationship is understanding and patience. Without these, all relationships detoriate. Initial stages of love are all gooey and both the parties find each others faults funny or loving. It is only when one starts living with a preson that one learns the ture nature of the person and it is then that the true test of relationship starts. Money too plays an important part in relationships. When money problems arise, love flies out of the window.
1 person likes this
@tigerdragon (4297)
• Philippines
27 Aug 07
complete understanding is a fantasy, my friend. We can never COMPLETELY understand anyone but know and be aware and know how to manage yourself being with the other person. We must not be dependent on our partner on that love, it has to start from us and if you rpartner responds (not react)and there is constant response between the two of you then that's what you call communication.i am sorry, it is easy to say i love you and be together for a time than breaking which very hard to do because you do not want to huet the other person's feelings.You got to have that staying power by focusing your energy on living a positive relationship not by nagging, suspicion and controlling. these are poison in the mind and heart where it is better for you to let go than be together,giving each other peace of mind.
@MAX1966 (1030)
• Netherlands
26 Aug 07
Breaking up is quite easy??? ow,is that so? i dont think so but understanding,listening to eachother,that will make a relationship will last
1 person likes this
@navtech (1776)
• India
26 Aug 07
Dear Sukumar794, If the relatives are good and honest people you can maintain the relationship for a long time otherwise it is very difficult to maintain relationship with relatives who are selfish, squanders, jealous. These selfish relative has one thing in their mind that "WHAT IS IN IT FOR ME". The bad relatives not only do not maintain good relationship but also try to destroy the good relationship that you have with others. It is my personal experience.
• Philippines
24 Aug 07
i don't know what's the secret for that..i just broke up with my partner because of misunderstanding..you see we are in a long distance relationship for so long..but we never got it so tight..he always argue because he don't trust me..i did something bad but its not cheating..i lied to him on some delicate matters..and he just cannot trust me anymore..now we just call it quits..time to move on.
1 person likes this
@RobinJ (2501)
• Canada
24 Aug 07
I think one of the things that is required for a long standing relationship is to not try to change your partner.because that speaks to me that you have compromised your ideals to be with some one, and when that is done if it is a significant compromise, it is almost impossible to carry through. Yes we all can not find the perfect partner, but if you find your self changing your beliefs and ideals to please some one else again this is almost impossible to carry through, so to expect some one to change for you just doesn't work
@maddysmommy (16243)
• United States
24 Aug 07
Most definitely needs a lot of patience, tolerance, understanding, comprimising, communication and all sorts and most of all love, trust and honesty. Relationships are never easy and if you are willing to give it all you've got, and stick to it when the going gets tough and rough then by all means it will work if you want it to.
1 person likes this
@derek_a (10903)
24 Aug 07
As a counsellor and a therapist, I have attended and ran many relationship workshops over the years and from my experience it seems that what creates the most powerful relationships is total support for each other and giving each other the space of grow and develop mentally and physically. A big problem in society today is when other try to get their partners conform to what they feel the partner should be like. That tends to be one-sided where the dominator and dominated may become very miserable.
1 person likes this
@lyndee22 (1211)
• Philippines
24 Aug 07
You said it right. Patience, understanding, respect, trust are components of a strong relationship. The will to maintain it is there but it is hard to achieve it if there's no cooperation on both parties
1 person likes this
@eshaan (6193)
• India
24 Aug 07
Ya,but the patience and forbearance should be from both sides, one sided adjustments can't work for many days.Human nature has a thirst for love and caring,and if only one person does the asjusments, he will be tired one day and the relationship stops to continue.
1 person likes this
@healwell (1271)
• Ahmedabad, India
24 Aug 07
What ever it is but if related both person or even a group of friends have three basic things then there will not be any kind of breaking possibilities! THese three things are 1. Love -spiritual understanding 2. care -human understanding 3. friendship - A synchronizing of above two with sensitivity based understanding I think and feel that if any one has these quality in him/her then that person is surely able to achieve long as well as warm relationship with any person! And if it is with both or the group then... yes for them heaven is here!
@vitekfdr (651)
• United States
24 Aug 07
People should be honest and trust each other. If they will trust each other there won't be any problems, and the relationship will be strong.
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42794)
• United States
23 Aug 07
I go aalong with you on that it takes work form both partners to keep along relationship
1 person likes this