babies being hurt by mothers

I think you did a wise and good thing, just what a good friend ought to do, though i feel that your friend couldnt have liked it when shed said that shes the mother and to mind your own business. She also must have been angry with herself for hurting her own child, and then to be told by you, making her burst out. Some people are like that and get irritated by small things, they arent able to control their anger and temper and not wantingly also just burst out without seeing in front or to whom they are getting angry at. Your friend seems to be under going the same phase. And you should help her out. Talk to her in free time, when the baby is not around, explain to her that its only a baby and does not understand the right from wrong as yet, and it takes many months or even a year or so of patience trying to stop the baby sucking the thumb. Similarly there are many things that as a mother, your friend will have to pateintly and carefully deal with, when the kids come in the way, guess if she has a good friend like you with her, she would be alright with her.

I don't think you did the wrong thing, but I wonder if she really is a good mother. She could try and warn him before even spanking him. He is only one year old, you should not spank your child at that age.

She is not good person and i pity of her child.you did the right one but since she said that to you then you must leave her alone.but if you can still observe for the baby,she might lose her temper easily and she hurt her baby badly.

She sounds very impatient and selfish..She should have all the time in the world for the child, not spank him...OMG thats horrible..Im glad that you said something...

I think you did the right thing..Its not that babies fault at all...I would of done the same thing. That baby didn't ask to be here...she should be happy thats all that baby does is suck his/her thumb. The baby could of had so much more wrong with his/her.Just keep on looking after that baby he needs someone...Not saying she don't love him but him getting spanked now it could get worse and no one needs to go through that..Best of luck..

u did the right thing by telling her. But some people are reluctant in taking advises just as your friend. U take it easy. She will learn a lesson when she has to. But you did the right thing by telling her so. I was also the impatient kinds with my child. My husband sets me right.

What? one year old baby spank by his mother? what is going on with her? is she out of her mind? why did she do that? you have to report that.

Its so wrong to hurt a child that small she will just break his spirit and free will. Thumb sucking is an essential part of growing up and kids do that all the time at that age-its soothing for their gums. I think you should call authorities and report her for hurting her child and may be they can make her go to some parenting guidance counselling sessions.

You did the right thing. I would have said something close to that to my friend in this situation. Thumb sucking is not supposed to end until 2 or 3 years old. thats when you kindly teach them you need to stop doing that. but to spank a little baby for thumb sucking is dumb! cause thats like their security from them. She must have had a confusing child hood.

You are so right. I am glad you spoke up against this mother's behavior. It is not right to spank a one year old for sucking their thumb. That is a natural behavior of a baby. I would recommend to this mother that she is a good mother, but she needs to relax a little bit and maybe take some advice from others. You know, she may just need a little break from the little one.

First of all, it is up to her how she disciplines her child, if you don't agree with spanking then that's fine, but it isn't your place to push your views. Every parent has the right to discipline their children exactly how they want. I think you could have waited to bring up your concerns until another time when she wasn't frustrated over something her child has done. Unfortunately, you may care for the child but in the end she is the mother & she is the only one who has the right to decide how she'll raise her child. Oh & at 1 year old, they do start to do things that they know they shouldn't to get a rise out of the parent, they will outgrow it but they're not really babies any more at that age :) My suggestion, that you could suggest to your friend, that i would give the child a pacifier, it's better for the teeth than thumb sucking & then she wouldn't get so frustrated with the child not listening!

I'm not being a hypocrite but my heart really goes out to infants and babies. And I must admit that I'm irked by the attitude of your friend towards her one-year old son. Despite this, I'm thinking of a reason why she does this to her child. And what I could deduce is that she wants to teach her son about discipline; but I guess what she's doing is a bit too early. She could instill discipline on the baby but she should do it in a very gentle way. I believe your friend is troubled and worried about other matters. I'm pretty sure that one of these is with regards to the financial aspect of having a baby; whether the child is her firstborn or second or third child. There's nothing wrong with telling this to your friend. Though she reacts negatively to your "teaching", it's better that she knows that you're concerned not only with the baby's welfare but also of your friend.

No I believe you were very right for telling her to stop. Because, depending on how bad it got alot worse could happen not saying she would do that for sure but better now for her to figure out what she is doing and fix it before its too late. Your a very good friend to her and her baby.

Where I live it is a crime, punishable by a mandatory prison sentence, to physically abuse any person that is helpless - such as a baby. More than that: If an individual has "reason to believe" that a helpless person is being abused, and the individual does not report it to child welfare or the police, that individual can face DOUBLE mandatory jail time!! You did right - you need to do more! http://www.davidben-gershon.bravehost.com http://www.kasamba.com/david-ben-gersshon.com

Well, that is abuse. You shouldn't be hitting a child at that age, for thumb sucking or in any case. Friend or not, I would report it. It's abuse, simple as that. Plus she is showing signs, the early signs of being abusive. She might really hurt that baby when people are not looking. I would keep a close eye out and I would warn her that this is abuse and she should stop. Shame on her.

Spanking a child at that age when he has no cognitive ability to understand is just abuse. It's just her taking out her frustrations, but the only thing she is doing is causing fear and anguish for the baby. This is the age that they need reassurance, love and comfort. They need to feel secure and safe. If she is hitting him, then she's only causing problems later down the road. People don't realize how delicate children are in these first developmental stages. They don't think or learn the way older children or adults do. Does she offer anything else for him to suck on after spanking him? This is a natural instinct and also a way for a baby to find comfort. So when he's trying to comfort himself, he's getting punished for it. How do you think that screws up his mind? She's causing problems early on.

she's lucky to have a friend like you. she must have felt embarassed when you called her attention and her way of justifying her actions was to tell you to leave her alone. just be patient with her she might have some issues to settle within herself, taking care of a baby is a full and demanding task. talk to her in such a way that as if you are only making suggestions not questioning her parenting style. and if you still see that she's still being rough with her child talk to her husband who knows she may need professional help.

No, you did the right thing. Now as her friend you need to talk to her about gettin some help. She is obviously not coping and whether this is from post natal depression or because this is how her parents treated her or just that she has a baby, no guidance and is unable to cope with all the demands that comes with a child she really needs help. Perhaps you could go with her to a doctor and help her get the help she needs. Don't be like a lot of people and turn away from her. Just remembe, if she was a bad person you would not be her friend would you?

Some mothers feel very stressed when it comes to discipline their children. I am sure your friend loves her kid and doesn't want to hurt him. That's the way she thinks a child must be disciplined. You are right about telling her she might be wrong.

its call child abuse..