Friendship At Stake

Feinds are there to comfort you and talk to you until you feel better about your self but never ask for money froma friend for it ruins the friend ship

Sometimes a person does not have the financial resources to help you and if he did, he would suffer, or maybe have to give up what he needs. I know what I am talking about. I was pressured to give money and found that by doing so, I had to give up something I had worked hard for. You do not know if this friend has a financial problem of your own, he may have a family to support, may have been obligated to support an elderly member = pay for insurance, etc. Did you ask him for a loan and did you promise to pay him back? Or did you keep asking him before that this time, he thought you were crying, "WOLF."

The truest of friendship is not based on financial resources. Friends are there for other reasons than to give money when you need it. If a friend turns a deaf ear to me when I need money then I think about things like their status, but at the same time I would never ask a friend for money.

I do not expect my friends to help me with their financial resources. They have families and many needs, just as I do. We are friends, and that friendship is what we give to one another.

man that is hard to say what can ya do maybe the friend has something to deal with to and just can't spear the time right now

In my opinion, if this friend has always been helping and offering comforts, and this time he turns a deaf ear, this friend is indeed a true dear friend. He could actually be helping by not offering help this time round. I have come to realise that I have instead of helping a friend in need, I am actually destroying him. Sadly, I lost that friend. At times, it is better to help a man to fish rather than fish for the man. My friend, treasure this close friend instead. Such true friend are hard to come by and is definitely not measured in terms of financial resources.

No need at all to be hard on a friend who has history of helping out and then he fails to come in at a time of need! It is sad to stake friendship to resources-that is a fallacious relationship-a friend must be one regardless of whether he has or has not. Understand why a helping friend has not been able to help out this time round, there could be a real reason for this inability to help!

friend ship is a nice thing in life .. a friend mean many things to gether he is the one we could share our dreams and thoughts ..if he left me i think it maybe becouse of something i did to him if not i will see why he do that..

My friends would never put me in that position because they would all know that I am never in a position to help other than as a resource and idea person, but helping out with cash sorry no can do,As well I would rather go with out than borrow from a friend. I have learned that I have to look after the pennies each and every one of them and to spend one is going to put me in jeopardy some where down the line, In other words I will not indulge now and starve later.

I understand what you mean but have found some of my friends have gone to great troubles to help me out. So I have been very lucky to have such good friends in my life.

Dear Mr. Sukumar794, I am also in the same line of thinking because now a days children become too selfish and consider their that parents duty to provide them all comforts but in return they do not give much importance to parents hardship and feeling. Once they established in life they neglect the parents completely. They failed to look after the parents at their old age. Out of experience I am writing this is what really happening today.

I believe that a true friend will not care about financial resources, if the need is there a friend will most certainly offer help in all areas of life. In most cases, friends are often times in the same situation, which leaves emotional support to uplift friends morale. Turning a deaf ear to a friend is not a friendly gesture and can only lead to resentment in the end for both.

It does seem that our modern existence has become more and more based on financial values, but it doesn't really have to be that way. It would be good if we could look towards other cultures (e.g. Zen Buddhism & other disciplines) to re-discover our true values. :-)

Hi Sukumar, it all depends on the values you place in a friendship. My few true friends would never turn my plea for financial help down, but I would also not ask for it lightly, and of often. If one of my true friends does not help when I am in need while I know she/he could do that easily - than this is not a true friendship any longer, nor would I concider it as such. From normal friends you shouldn't expect any financial help as it most often ruins friendships due to non timely payments back, or other reasons. All in all friendship, be it from the few real friends you have, or from other friends shouldn't be checked as financial resource. TheFortunes

I am sorry to hear that you have a friend like mine... which is now an ex-friend. Yes... for that type of people... it is about money first... and friendship second. In fairness... they develop an addiction to money which becomes a mental disease. They lose sight of what life is really about. They get that idea that you can buy everything with money... and that everything has to be sacrifice to make that money. If you don't sacrifice your life like they did in order to make money... they will regard you as a loser. Not everyone is like that... but on the other hand... don't expect anyone to give you something for nothing. Everyone wants something in return. Usually your soul.

I think true friendship can never be based on financial reliability of a person. But when things go wrong, and a friend whom I have considered "my true friend" turns a deaf ear to my plea, I would take things into consideration. What if that friend does not have enough to help me? What if he or she is just embarassed to tell me that he or she can't help me at that time I'm in need? Who knows, if he or she were probably in a better situation, I might have not been turned down or turned away from. I really can't judge my friend if ever that time came, most especially if that same person is one of those persons I have considered my most valuable friend throughout the years. Just the same, I wouldn't want my friend to judge me if she were in that situation too. Here's how I look at true friendship http://www.paulynramirez.com/on-friends-and-friendship/