Persistent members on freecycle

United States
March 11, 2008 11:23am CST
Okay I really need to vent!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am a member of the local freecycle group in my area and I just posted an two offers this morning. Since posting the offers I have had one person email me 4 times for both of the offers in about an hour time span. UGH!!!! I have not responded back to her or anyone else that has replyed to them because I like to wait a couple of hours before deciding who I am going to give the items to. This person who want the stuff is someone I don't want to give to. A couple of months ago I had posted an offer for a mystery box and she was the one to get it. After she picked it up she sent me a nasty email saying it was all junk and should have gone in the garbage. Now I know some of you are probably going to tell me to email her and tell her that I will not give her the stuff and to stop emailing me about it. But that is not the proper thing to do. You see there is actually 3 freecycle groups in my area. I am the owner of one of them and then I also have a seperate email id as a standard member for the all three groups. I use me alternate id strictly for posting offers and wanteds. So this lady has no clue that I am actually an owner of a neighboring group. So it would not be appropriate for me to confront her as a standard member (that she thinks I am) and since I am not a moderator or owner of the neighboring group that I posted the offer on I can't email her as a moderator either. So really my hands are tied! Of course I am not here for advice on how to deal with her. I just need to vent. UGH!!!!!!!! Anyways, I was wondering if anyone has ever had this same problem with someone replying to your offer over and over again before you have a chance to pick someone? If so, how did you handle it? I am just curious as to how others might handle this kind of situation. Thanks for letting me vent!
4 people like this
12 responses
@jerzgirl (9234)
• United States
21 Apr 08
There are a couple things you could do. You could send her an email that says that you have already chosen someone, but that she is on your backup list if that person doesn't come - even if it's not true. She should know the FreeCycle rules that the giver gets to decide who gets what. Or you could have the moderator write to her (she won't you it's the same person, as you stated) saying several people have complained that she is aggressive in her responding to offers and that she needs to refrain from that. If she's doing it to you, she's doing it to others, I'm sure. Then in future posts state that anyone responding more than once without good reason (there are a few) will not be considered. Just like those who post that previous no-shows will not be considered. I realize that both of my ideas aren't strictly truthful, but since the alternative is either direct confrontation (which can cause more problems) or having to endure it (which is another problem), I think they're the kindest options to use. Good luck!!
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Apr 08
Thank you for your options that you shared. If something like this ever happens again I will be sure to use one of them. But for now this situation has been taken care of a few weeks ago.
• United States
14 Apr 08
I understand how you feel! Although I am not a group mod or owner, I'm a regular at posting offers. One time I posted an offer for a huge basket full of toys, someone was interested in them and wanted to pick them up. I set the stuff outside and a car came by and left. No one ever picked up the items. I later got a really angry letter stating that it was just junk, and I shouldn't be wasting my time posting stuff like that. Not everything posted on Freecycle is worth gold! Anyways, everytime I've put up a post, this same person would reply to every offer I put up about three or four times, even after they were taken! Eventually, I just blocked them. I usually do a first reply, first receieve kind of thing. Also, another person goes around stating that they want the items for charity, when I found out from someone that knew them, that they were turning around and selling them. There's no need to lie so you get picked first! To sum it up, I know a lot of people who hate Freecycle for these reasons, but I think it's a few of those people out there that are very inconsiderate and annoying. Boy! If they knew you were a owner of Freecyle!!
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Apr 08
Could you just imagine if they knew I was an owner. That is the exact reason why I use a totally different id for posting offers and such. It makes it more fair because that way people don't feel obligated to give to me because I am an owner. Having a seperate id makes me equal to everyone else. But at the same time it can be a pain. I mean when I am approving messages on my own freecycle group, I will see stuff that I want. But I have to log out and log back in under my other id just to request them.
@mememama (3076)
• United States
25 Mar 08
Yes, it's usually some sob story over and over again by the same person of "I just moved here and don't have anything"-yet they have a computer? or "please pick me, I really need it". Last time I said a guy can have a lamp, and asked when he'd like to pick it up. He didn't respond that day, so I gave it to the next person in line. I know when I want something I stalk my email box that day. Well for two weeks this loser emailed me how mean I am. I just ignored him, it's just a lamp!
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Mar 08
Wow, the nerve of some people. You should have reported him to the mods. If he did that to you, I imagine he is doing it to more people. Stuff like that I don't tolerate on my own group.
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
• United States
16 Mar 08
I belong to a freecycle in my area too and when this happens I just email them telling them I already gave it to someone.
• United States
27 Mar 08
I guess I could have done that but I didn't want to have to communicate with her at all because of how rude she was with me the first time.
• United States
16 Mar 08
Hi Speedy, as a mod on freecycle I feel your pain, LOL. This is what I would do, and it won't affect you in any way, block her emails to that email addy. I have people do that to me too, or they will try and post wants for the same item everyday. It makes our jobs so much harder. Are you having the same issue I am, with wanted post becoming more extravagant. Members are asking for mobile homes, vechicles all kinds of things. I had to do a special notice last week that I would begin removing members from the site, if it continued, and reminded them what the purpose of FC is.
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Mar 08
First off sorry for just now getting back to you. I have been busy and caught up in another discussion. As for your response. The wanted's aren't too bad as of yet, but my group isn't really big. I haven't blocked her yet, but the next time I offer something if she does it again. I fully plan on blocking her.
@dizzblnd (3073)
• United States
16 Mar 08
I have had that happen. I simply ignore them. I have made a file in my yahoo mail where I put no-shows, irritating people etc.. so if I have a response for something I've offered from that person, I simple ignore them completely
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Mar 08
Ignore her is what I did and I have saved one of her emails. I do the same thing as you. I have different folders for No shows, irritating people, and even a folder for people that are always looking for the same thing. Like plastic containers, and such. That way if I ever have something one of them always collects. I can just send them an email saying I have what they are looking for instead of posting an offer for it.
@Thoroughrob (11742)
• United States
11 Mar 08
I have, and I just ignore them. I cannot believe that someone would complain about what you gave them. I would give them nothing else either.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Mar 08
Well so far that is what I have done, ignored her! Yeah she complained alright. She sent me a really nasty message saying thank you for the junk and wasting her gas and that the garbage men would love the box full of junk. So needless to say she will never get anything else from me ever!
• United States
11 Mar 08
I'm on a freecycle group in my area and I've never had that happen. I just wonder why she'd want the items after she was so nasty to you before. Just ignore the emails and give the stuff to who you want to have it. Then just maybe send out an email to announce that the stuff has been taken. Try not to let it aggravate you too much!
• United States
12 Mar 08
I have been wondering the same thing. Why would she want more stuff from me after what happened that last time? It really seems fishy to me. As for posting a taken when the stuff is gone. That is something I always do once the items are gone. I just wish she would get the picture that she isn't going to get the stuff because I have yet to respond to her.
@bdugas (3578)
• United States
14 Mar 08
i believe deciding who to give something you post is the hardest thing about freecycle. I had so many emails with so many reasons why I should give it to them, and the one I picked because they said it would truly benefit their deaf daughter never showed up. so I gave to someone else in hopes since it was a pet that they took good care of it, and didn't sell it. If someone is persistent, I try tosee if they are really in need of this item, something like a stove or bed, and that is why they keep sendung an email. Soem times I just think some want it all every thing they can get, heard someone say they stock up for the local yard sale each year. I think freecycle is a good thing but there is always someone to abuse it no matter what it is. And if some one came and got something from me and then called to complain they would get no more, I try my best to let them know from the start if something is wrong with it or how it is, they do not have to take it if they don't like it. My opinion is it said mystery box and they just curious to what was in it. I would either ignore her or just let her know she didn't like what I gave before so she should not expect to get anything else from me.
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Mar 08
Thanks for the suggestions. It has been taken care of. The moderator sent her an email telling her she only needs to send one email and then wait to hear back from people. As for telling her that she will never get anything else from me, I can't do that. To me that would just be stooping to her level. I just ignored her and hopefully I never come across her again.
@musicman6 (2406)
• United States
12 Mar 08
Hang in there speedy, I know you will be alright, now that you have had a chance to vent some pent-up feelings! Yes, I know, sometimes there are these individuals that make you want to pull your hair out! We just have to do what we have to do, and just do our best! "just keep on truckin'"
1 person likes this
• United States
12 Mar 08
As always, thank you so much for your kind words. You always seem to know exactly what to say to cheer me up. Have a great day!
1 person likes this
@Ldyjarhead (10233)
• United States
11 Mar 08
I've not had that happen, but if I did, I would just ignore it and delete the emails. Can you block her email address with your email program? That might help.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Mar 08
Yes I can block her. I just haven't done it yet. But thanks for the suggestion.
@fossesor (268)
• Philippines
12 Mar 08
pick someone to?