I don't want to go home anymore!
By gxnfly
@gxnfly (1147)
China
May 5, 2008 3:16am CST
I went home to my parents ,they live in the city ,last week.I wanted to tell my parents about my new plan about my future.I was very careful about that,I said to my father,"I just want to tell you my thoughts,if you don't agree,I will give up."After I said my plan,my father act just as usual,shouted"How can you do that?Don't get yourself cheated!You are just being ideal,you should face the truth!I'm really disappointed at you..."I forced myself to stay calm,I didn't say a word.After a while I said to my father,I want to go the country home in which my brother and sisters live.I worked out my parents's home,wandering in the streets,felt homeless with tears pouring down from my eyes.
I felt really lonely,my families are all disappointed about me.It's all my own faults.I'm in no place to talk about my new plan when I failed them for dropping out of college.My parents don't have a good temper,they just shout at me everytime,they never listen.I just want to get away,far away form home,I don't want to go home ever never!
4 people like this
21 responses
@dragon54u (31636)
• United States
5 May 08
Your parents love you. If they didn't, they wouldn't be so upset.
What plan did you present?
Go back and talk with them. Tell them you appreciate their worry about you but that you need their support to carry out your plan, whatever it is. Let them know that the world is changing and those who don't change with it will stay at the bottom.
Maybe your father is right. What is your plan?
2 people like this
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
5 May 08
Well being a woman I understand how difficult it is for you to stand on your own feet and defy family, especially in a traditional society like China’s which is very similar to Indian society. if you were a guy, you could have gone on anywhere to try your luck but being a girl you have to keep in mind the physical threats of the outside world. Ask your parents what plans do they have in store for you. Do they want to marry you off? Admit it that you did a mistake by dropping college…you not only hurt their hopes and feelings, you ruined your chance of a good and proper job. You have no other way than listening to them. Maximum you can do is talk to them as logically as you can and try and understand their plans for our future. At this moment they are angry on you for letting them down, once the heat settles down I am sure you all can have a more amicable discussion.
2 people like this
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
5 May 08
i am so sorry to hear about your story gxnfly and how your parents treat you... i don't blame you if you feel lonely and can't speak with anybody because your parents always shout at you... but i don't think running away from home will solve the problem... you have to face it and as you say, you failed your parents when you drop out from college... may be you can do something to rectify that and prove yourself to your parents... i wish you all the best and luck... take care and God Bless you...
2 people like this
@subha12 (18441)
• India
5 May 08
it happens in life. sometime you are so offened in life that you really do not want to go back home. but i think the parents should be somewhat flexible in actually accepting the ideas of childen as long a sthey are not so destructive.so be calm and think the way you can make them proud enough.
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
5 May 08
I know exactly how you feel. I had to strike it out on my own to get some peace of mind. You will have to do that also whether your parents like it or not. Soem parents do not listen and they do not take the time to listen and understand their children. All they do is hollar and make the choices for you in some cases. I wish you the best and do what you have to do to make it and be happy in life.
2 people like this
@2btrueinu (700)
• Philippines
5 May 08
Leaving home is not the answer to your problem it make worst. Parent sometimes are over reacted but they tells us what good for us, they say what they see and know. It's good you tell them what in your mind and if they reacted that way to have nothing to do with. Now all you have to do is make them proud of you and don't make them disappointed maybe they are like that because you failed them. Now if you made them proud of you they will trust and consider your proposal because they know you can do it and they will believed you. Don't feel so bad make that experience a lesson to make your dream come true. Don't waste you tear in crying do something continue your studies it's for your own good. They want to see you in stable life that all a parent want for their children.
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
5 May 08
It does sound really tough, I don't know what to say, maybe to get away is a good thing for you to do at the moment. Your parents may not know how to talk to you but they want the best for you, even if you do not see it their way. A good education will get you further in life than not having one and I think that is what they are very concerned about.
1 person likes this
@p3halliwel2005 (3156)
• Philippines
5 May 08
I am so sorry about what happened. I am not really sure what you did and what your plan is that made your parents act like that. But nevertheless parents get mad because they want only the best for their children. They are still your parents no matter what. They might not understand you now but try to understand as well that they are just being parents. Do what would make you happy and if what you think you are doing is the right thing. Be strong and face the consequences but never ever turn your back away from your parents. They never turned their backs on you when you were born. Take care and I do hope you work it out somehow.
@LouRhi (1502)
• Australia
5 May 08
Sorry to hear your parents are giving you a hard time. It is not easy being the youngest sometimes.
College is not for everyone, unfortunately though parents tend to disagree. My own mother is disappointed about me deciding not to finish either of the two degrees I started, so I know how you feel.
What our parents need to realise is that we lead our own lives and there will be times that we make decisions that they may view as wrong. However we know what we want and we have every right to follow our dreams and ideals rather than those of another.
I hope that your parents are able to come round as family is always important and should be able to heal any rift. Though it is not always easy.
Big hugs to you and I hope you work it out. Stay strong and all will be well
1 person likes this
@julyteen (13252)
• Davao, Philippines
9 May 08
if you feel that you can live independent without them why not but be sure that you are ready to face the challenge living alone or without you parents. it is not easy to live the world alone. if your parents have reason why they don't want to support your plan so take their advice. be patience and respect your parents they are after you good not for bad.
@ediona (147)
• Romania
5 May 08
To go far away from home it is not a way,think abot it:you will be alone and then nobody will suport you or be in desagree with you,you need yor family bad or good.Try to fiind anothere way to convince your parents about your plan,and make him to understand you are mature now,if you go far from him you will only make him to figure that you are not mature and you dont deserve to take yor own decision,only the child run away when they are scolded.
@gxnfly (1147)
• China
5 May 08
You are right.Stupid thoughts go around my head when I'm really sad.I should take responsibilities for my own behavior.Now I'm old enough,I'm in no place to seek financial support from my family for my future.I'm very sensitive about that,perhaps I won't go home unless I can prove myself to them.
1 person likes this
@paulw33 (297)
• United States
5 May 08
well im a dad to i think the screaming is just his way to get his point accross i do the same thing i feel i have to so i get my point accross i feel if i dont my children will over power me maybe you should listen maybe they are telling you for your own good you need to think long and hard if you move far away then who are you going to have
1 person likes this
@solitudine (603)
• India
5 May 08
I am just sorry to hear what you are having to get through. But,all I can tell you is that,please don't take any drastic decision at these hours,and remember to be confidant,held your chin up,and face things as they come and be sure that all these hardships that you are being putting through would soon end,and there will be a day when you would be sitting back thinking about htese days,and how you faced them;There is always an end to everything,and there is always some light after thedarkness; So,have faith in yourself,everything will be okay soon! Best of luck to you;
@blindolf (14)
• Philippines
5 May 08
i guess parents will always be like that, they always forget or maybe can't accept that you have grown-up and capable of deciding for yourself.
it's your life, you can just tell them what you wanna do with it but the final decision is still yours and whatever happens you will just have to take responsibility.
@danishkhan657 (54)
• India
5 May 08
listen sir just stay calm and present your thought before your father in a more appealing way showing your maturity and gross interest in your plan and i am sure your father would support you because afterall he is your father.
best of luck
@olivemai (4738)
• United States
5 May 08
Many parents are like that! They expect the best for you and of you! Sometimes it is good to move away and make a new life for yourself! After so many years, people often forgive and you can talk on the telephone after that! Once in a while, go back and visit. Try to keep your expectations more realistic, that they will possibly never accept your new life, but you are still okay! There are many people who did not fulfill their parents wishes, but their own!
@kun2349 (23381)
• Singapore
5 May 08
U cant walk away just like that.. ALthough everyday time your parents will scold or shout at u, but it's for your own good.. They meant well for u.. They are scared for u as u do not have proper qualifications to find a good paying job..
Wat u can do is to prove them wrong.. Think about your strong points, work towards that.. Or making your hobby as your job, show them the money but not the hard work.. it's not being egolistic, but rather being independant on yourself..
@Tabby123 (53)
• United States
5 May 08
Hey. I wanted you to know that your not alone. I have felt the same way at times. Dont worry you didnt fail them you just did what you thought was best there is nothing wrong with doing what you beieve in. I have gotten into alot of arguement with my parents about stupid stuff like wanting to move out and I have ran away and everything but dont let them bring you down you will be ok no matter what just do what you want because whats the point n going to collage if its not something you want its pointless you should do what you want to do Remember what ever you decide it will affect you not your parents its your life not theres. But anyways good luck.
@sisterjinx (1135)
• United States
5 May 08
Parents don't always have the same plans for their children that the children end up living out. If you know that your plan is strong then listen to your heart. If you have doubts about your plan, let them be your own.
I love and respect my mother but if I listened to her every time she told me I was wrong or crazy for doing something I wouldn't be living my dream now. Her hopes for me were that I would live "her" life identically. That wasn't for me. She has never thought I could get published but I have been published. Sometimes you have to do what YOU know is right even when others tell you it is not.
Now this is not to say that your plan is going to be successful. It might not be but it might be. If you don't try will you always wonder?
