The child is too old

@dawnald (84157)
Shingle Springs, California
August 21, 2008 10:57pm CST
I remember growing up and being told I was too old... you're too old for trick or treating, stay home next year... you're too old to play with dolls... you're too old to act like that... How do you decide when your child is too old for something? Or do you let the child decide in most cases?
2 people like this
9 responses
@roanne05 (1292)
• Oman
25 Aug 08
i am still not a mother but for me i would let my child decide on that...it is his/her right.
@dawnald (84157)
• Shingle Springs, California
25 Aug 08
I think so too.
@relundad (2312)
• United States
24 Aug 08
I think that we live in a society full of hidden "age appropiate" limits. Normally as it relates to kids its basically at the parent's discretion. And what really is the difference in being too old and not old enough? Parenting is all about preparing for the future and most of the times when we as parents say that "you are too old for this or that", its more like directing the child to a more age appropiate phase of life. The reality is that as children you need the direction to move forward, and who else would you get the direction from? Age brings about change in responsibilty, reaction,rules and consequences. Part of being a parent is making decisions that your child doesn't have the ability to make for themselves. And typically you make those decisions based on your childs personality, needs and level of maturity.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84157)
• Shingle Springs, California
24 Aug 08
I guess if my 11 year old were still watching Barney I'd be concerned, but so far my kids seem to be moving on to age appropriate things on their own!
• Bahamas
22 Aug 08
Hi dawnald! I tend to let my children decide most of the time. I have never had to tell them they're to old for something,it seems as if they just decide and that's that.I remember when my eldest daughter was 12 her telling me she didn't want anymore dolls because she was to old for them and passing them down to her little sister, that made me sad, because it showed me she wasn't my baby anymore,but in fact she was growing up. I do find myself telling them that about their behavior on a few occasions though. Like my ten year old thinking she can throw a tantrum at the drop of a hat.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84157)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Aug 08
that happens with my kids too!
@jnk3dfx (721)
• India
22 Aug 08
I think you cant judge or decide that child is too old for something. A Child itself can understand those thigs as its grow up, as its starts understanding things arround it. But its the parents reponsibilty to teach thier child and make understand what is right and what is wrong. But eventually you cant ask a child not to do what it is doing, because it will do those things which it likes to do. Even Grown up people do all those things which they are not suppose to do. If somebody tells them its wrong they are not gona stop untill they realize themselves. I watch Cartoons even today and 24 years old. I like it thats why watch. My mom will tease me every time i watch cartoons, still i like cartoons. No one can stop or Should not stop other person doing things that they really like to do. Thats Human Nature.
@dawnald (84157)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Aug 08
yep!
• India
22 Aug 08
Well as a girl, I was of course too old for most things (same as you) the moment I started menstruating (9yrs) and it’s a big big scar on my psychology. So though I tell my son to be more responsible as he is older now (like arrange your own books, dress up yourself and such)…I indulge him. In no time he has grown from a baby to a toddler to a boy of 9 and in no time he will be a lad and I can no longer cuddle and indulge him…so I just let him be, enjoy his childhood (though not at the cost of manners and discipline)
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84157)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Aug 08
:-)
@pehpot (4762)
• Philippines
22 Aug 08
That is true, I have kids and sometimes I told them they are too old for something or times I say they are too young for that. I think we just say these to have an excuse for them.
@dawnald (84157)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Aug 08
maybe :-)
@gabs8513 (48803)
• United Kingdom
22 Aug 08
I always let my Kids decide if they where to old for something or not To me when Parents say that to their Children, they are taking part of the Child hood away from them and Children grow up to fast as it is so in most cases my Children where left with that Decision
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84157)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Aug 08
I like that!
@redkathy (3379)
• United States
22 Aug 08
For the most part I let my boys decide. On a few occasions, when I thought that they might have problems like being made fun of or something like that, I would explain that I thought they were too mature or grown up. I tried to let them know why they shouldn't rather than telling them the couldn't. They usually understood and then declined to do whatever on their own. Now if it was acting overly immature I certainly would tell them their behavior was unacceptable for their age.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84157)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Aug 08
Once in a while I try to tell them something may be a problem with the kids at school. Usually they disagree with me and then they get set straight by the kids at school.
@mcat19 (1358)
• United States
22 Aug 08
I would let the child decide. Children mature at different rates. It's like telling a little boy he's too old to cry. If he feels like crying, he should cry. If he doesn't, he will be repressed and not be able to deal with his emotions. You're never too old for anything. Maybe that's my second childhood talking.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84157)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Aug 08
mine too :-)