Would you call yourself an independent woman? Are you 'Miss Independent'?

@marina321 (4561)
September 3, 2008 6:22pm CST
I was listening to Neyo's new single 'Miss Independent' (on youtube) that will be on his next album due to be released on 16th September. Apart from the catchy tune that will no doubt make this a hit, I really like the words of the track and it did make me think whether I'd call myself a 'Miss Independent' and whether I am indeed an independent woman or as independent as I'd like to be? What do you think is an 'independent woman'? Do you consider yourself to be an 'independent woman'? Maybe you really enjoyed that Destiny Child's track 'Independent Women' like many did..:-D Would you like to be an independent woman? Do you wish you were one? What do you think holds you back from achieving this? Do you prefer to be dependent on a spouse or partner perhaps or have no choice? which brings me to the next question, do you think men like or are attracted to 'independent women' (like Neyo suggests in this track) or are they 'scared' of them? Do you think they prefer a partner or spouse that is dependant or not dependant on them?
5 people like this
14 responses
• Malaysia
4 Sep 08
hi marina i have read all the postings and they really are good ... i am neither independent or dependent ... i am working, i do some side business for extra money, i am leaving in my own home .. i am married my husband does not interfear in what i do as long as i do not go overboard. we share house whole responsibilities if i was single maybe i can be considered as indipendent, when i am married although i am independent there are some unwritten rules that if taken negative can be considered lossing of independence .. on your question of if man prefer independent woman or not, i believe man prefer woman with centain level of independence not too much that the woman becomes "man of the house" cheers
1 person likes this
@marina321 (4561)
8 Sep 08
on your question of if man prefer independent woman or not, i believe man prefer woman with centain level of independence not too much that the woman becomes "man of the house" Yup, hard when you're both 'wearing the trousers', this can threaten some, not all..
@gemini_rose (16193)
4 Sep 08
I used to be independant, I was brought up to be independant and then I had to be independant when I ended up being a single parent. I then met the man I am now married too, and I was utterly determined to retain my independant status and I did for a while, until I started having more children. Then somehow slowly but surely I started to lose it, I stay at home with the children and rely on my hubby to bring in the wedge and I am just totally dependant. I only seem to have realised it lately and I absolutely hate it, I am in the process of trying to do something about it but I guess that I am so in a rut that it is going to take some time to figure it out and pull myself out of it.
1 person likes this
@marina321 (4561)
8 Sep 08
I only seem to have realised it lately and I absolutely hate it, I am in the process of trying to do something about it but I guess that I am so in a rut that it is going to take some time to figure it out and pull myself out of it. If you did it for your kids, then just enjoy it and take it easy on yourself. It can be hard to get back out there and it's one of the reasons I stayed in the work force as I work IT which changes all the time but I also did not have the option to stay home open.. I do enjoy being independent and wouldn't have it any other way..but if I had more kids I'd stay home too
• United States
4 Sep 08
I am pretty independent. I hate it when people do things for me. I like to do things for myself.
1 person likes this
@marina321 (4561)
8 Sep 08
Same applies to me, I am so used to doing things my way
@lannav (75)
5 Sep 08
I definatly used to be a totally indipendant woman but since I hooked up with my boyfriend and had my daughter I am less of an independant woman in some aspects. For example d.i.y, I used to do it all mself but now I nag him to do it. I also rely on him for alot but I think you do have to be quite indipendant to be a mother even if you are not single.
@marina321 (4561)
8 Sep 08
DIY! I recently bought a large set of screw drivers and feeling 'very macho' when I unscrew things...!my ex used to do all that [i] I think you do have to be quite indipendant to be a mother even if you are not single.[/i] Do you mean responsible maybe?
@lannav (75)
10 Sep 08
No I do mean Independant... Yep you need to be responsible but also strong and independant to do the role well.
@sunkissed (4332)
• United States
4 Sep 08
Yes, I am very independent. I divorced my husband 19 years ago. I have been disabled for 22 years.I live alone I do everything for myself.i possiably can. I have been in relationships, but I have trust and commitment issues. I have worked all my life up until the time I became disabled, I have learned from a early age that I should always be able to provide for myself.Even when I was married, I worked and made my own money, because I never wanted to rely on a man.I now live on social securiy disability, but my house is payed for as well as my car. I do not have all I want but do have all I need, and did it all by myself.
@marina321 (4561)
4 Sep 08
I do not have all I want but do have all I need, and did it all by myself. Good for you I am independent too though I'd like to be more independent by being my own boss as opposed to working for someone else... I haven't bought or paid for my house or car yet, but everything I've got I've worked for by myself This is the track I was talking about http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wtm8v6MryBk
• Malaysia
4 Sep 08
hi sunkissed,i read this somewhere and i believe it suits you well [/b]"look for the positive in all situations" [b] and you have may god bless you cheers
@checapricorn (16066)
• United States
5 Sep 08
[i]Hi marina, I am very independent in my whole life! I was trained too and I love the influence of my Parents about this...But, when I got married, once aspect of me became dependent and that is because I gave up my career and choose to become a fulltime housewife but I will still consider myself as very independent....I know someday, I will still build up again my career and help for our bills! Anyway, a lot of men loves independent woman but there are also men who prefer the opposite one for some reasons![/i]
@marina321 (4561)
8 Sep 08
Anyway, a lot of men loves independent woman but there are also men who prefer the opposite one for some reasons! That's true, some like to be the only ones 'wearing the trousers'
@bamakelly (5194)
• United States
4 Sep 08
I haven't heard of this song yet. But I think I might check it out. I like to think there are women who like to be independent even in a marriage. It is possible as long as there are certain boundaries they don't go over. A wife should be good and respectful to her husband and the same goes for a man. Some men might like a woman who depends on them though. I guess it is up to each couple what they choose to be happy.
@marina321 (4561)
8 Sep 08
I agree, totally depends on the couple and individuals.. This is the track I was talking about http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wtm8v6MryBk
@iyah10 (4116)
• Kuwait
4 Sep 08
I consider myself as one of the Miss Independent because at early time I already been working after I graduate my High School days and while working and helping with the family i am also studying at the same time to reached and fulfill my own dreams in the future.....
@marina321 (4561)
8 Sep 08
I am pretty independent too and like you started working at an early age This is the track I was talking about http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wtm8v6MryBk
@momoly (3)
4 Sep 08
i want to say i am independent and i had ever thought i was so,but now i know i cant say this.i am 19.although this age is not very young and i9,a person can do a lot,independence nearly haven't really come to me ,i even haven't been away fome my parents.i can do mang things all by myself ,but these things are all small matters,i don't think doing these means i am independent. i want things are under my control, so i will try my best to be independent after i go to college in 10 days.
@marina321 (4561)
8 Sep 08
Enjoy the dependence on your parents while it still lasts
@lazeebee (5468)
• Malaysia
4 Sep 08
Yup, Marina, believe I'm one. I'm married, but have my own career. Many of our home decisions are joint; but my personal decisions are really mine. I've my own interests and hobbies; which are different from his, and I am able to enjoy them on my own. I am the eldest in my family, and my parents and siblings still refer to me for decisions, so I am still very involved with my birth family. I take care of my parents with my own money - I don't depend much on my spouse; though it's nice to have spending money from him. Are men attracted to independent women? I'm not too sure - but I guess there are 2 sides to the opinion. My hubby is happy that I can stand on my own two legs; when he's not around, I won't be helpless. On the other hand, he sometimes feels that I don't need him enough (too independent for my own good, that's what he said!)
@marina321 (4561)
4 Sep 08
Are men attracted to independent women? I'm not too sure - but I guess there are 2 sides to the opinion. My hubby is happy that I can stand on my own two legs; when he's not around, I won't be helpless. On the other hand, he sometimes feels that I don't need him enough (too independent for my own good, that's what he said!) You put this quite well, my ex hubby used to hate the fact that I was independent and did not feel needed, wanted me to stay at home, bear some more kids and look after the family and home and not share the wearing of the trousers By the way, nothing wrong with this, it does work for some but not for others and as long as you are happy with your decision.... I have a career, look after my child, pay my bills, keep food on the table and a roof on our heads. I do feel independent but I would like to be even more independent and run my own businessas I am still dependent on my job LOL Here's the track I was talking about http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wtm8v6MryBk
4 Sep 08
Hi marina321, I have two friends who are independant, one friend is very much does everything for herseld because she has to and the othe friend is married but she does not dependant on her husband she works . I on the other hand have to depend o my husband because I cannot work anymore. Tamara
@marina321 (4561)
4 Sep 08
one friend is very much does everything for herseld because she has to and the othe friend is married but she does not dependant on her husband she works . I on the other hand have to depend o my husband because I cannot work anymore Everyone is different I guess and different things work for different people and some have just not had the chance or choice to be independent or dependent I am independent and have been for a while, I would like to be more independent and be my own boss some day soon as it sometimes sucks working for someone else This is the track I was talking about http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wtm8v6MryBk
@guybrush (4660)
• Australia
4 Sep 08
I'm not an independent woman at all! I got married at 22 and have been with my husband for 29 years. I have three daughters who are VERY independent, however - and it really surprises me how enterprising and brave they are. I would never have been able to have done some of the things they've done, so I really admire and respect them. My son, unfortunately, isn't nearly as independent as his sister. A pity!
@marina321 (4561)
4 Sep 08
Hey guybrush, if your daughters are independent, then all the props go to you too I know my mum would love for her gals to be as independent as she is and I get this from her:) I'd still like to be more independent and be my own boss like my mommy I am sure the son will catch on soon, I think this is normal for the boys if you even look at them when they're little, girls are different in many ways like my daughter and some of the little gals I've met will want to help in the kitchen, housework and the like and she's only 4...my aunts and friends who have boys say most little boys are not like this..I'd like to think it's got something to do with this or does it? Here's the track for you and your gals anyway http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wtm8v6MryBk
@lilaclady (28240)
• Australia
3 Sep 08
Oh yes I am a very independent woman, I think because I am a sagittarian has a lot to do with it.. I have always been this way, I have bought my own home without any help from a male partner and I like to make my own decisions...
@marina321 (4561)
4 Sep 08
I am pretty independent too...Haven't got round to buying my own house yet like you, you go girlplus I would like to be more independent by being my own boss and have my own business someday and pretty soon:) Otherwise, I can stand on my own two feet and I live with my daughter on our own (moved out of the family home to go study abroad when I was 18), work and have a career(have worked since I was 16), pay the bills, keep a roof on our heads and keep food on the table.. Do I like being independent? Loveit! This is the track I was talking about http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wtm8v6MryBk
• Philippines
9 Sep 08
I think that an independent women is someone that can stand on one's own. That is, she must be self-sufficient and does not rely on others for help. Someone that can make his own decision and have her own opinions and stands for certain matters. Well, i like to be independent so that I can prove to the world that i am capable of standing on my own feet. SO that, i will rely on myself and be confident of the consequences of my action. So that i can be strong and will be able to face any hardship that i will undergo. Its because for me, an independent women is strong-willed and that would make us totally opposite. So i want a change. Currently, i rely on the people near me. I rely on my parents for my basic needs like food, clothing and money. I rely on my friends for anything that is school-related. I don't know what could hold me back from achieving this. Maybe these people because they make me feel that i need them. Maybe my current situation, as a student, i need to fulfill an unwritten contract between me and my parents. That is to study and achieve a good future. So like they are telling me "You don't have to concern other things, just study and be good, we'll take care of the rest".. ahaha..... sounds scary.. .. Well, i prefer to be dependent with each other, if ever i will have a spouse. For me, this is needed to achieve a good family. When you can depend on each other, that means trust and will build into a strong relationship with your husband. Based from what i've observed in animes.. ahaha.. and dramas, men are more inclined to dependent women. It is because I hear quite often the words "I will protect you".. hahahaha.. so that makes me think that they probably like women to depend on them, maybe for protection.. I also heard one saying, "You're weak that make me want to protect you".. ahaha.. this is from an anime though.. hahaha...