Women! Someone help me to understand this PLEASE! lol.

@James72 (26832)
Australia
September 14, 2008 4:04am CST
OK. Let's just lay it all open here. There are a couple of behaviours of women here that I need to try to understand because it seems to be a pretty common occurence! First up - Why is it that us men can be sitting quietly through TV commercials yet the MINUTE the show we are watching comes back on, women decided right there and then to start a conversation? Did they not think that talking during the commercials was appropriate? Second question - Why do women choose to talk during the first ten minutes or so of a movie and then spend the rest of the movie asking us men what is going on IN the movie?? Anyone else experiencing the same? Can anybody explain why this seems to be a regular thing?
28 people like this
90 responses
@alokn99 (5717)
• India
14 Sep 08
James. I think it's best that the women here on mylot respond to this. But i remembered something that you had responded to in a discussion regarding men listening. It was something like this Oh we HEAR but we don't actually listen! Maybe they know this.
@alokn99 (5717)
• India
15 Sep 08
So how far have progressed on this mystery ,James ? Or does it seem to get only deeper ?
3 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
19 Sep 08
See! Proof of selective hearing in action mands! lol. Sorry alokn, we have many, many possible explanations so far but nothing definitive yet. I think that it is destined to be a life-long conundrum!
1 person likes this
@alokn99 (5717)
• India
20 Sep 08
So we are back to where we started from. .
2 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
14 Sep 08
ROFLMFAO....well I can honestly say that i'm NOT one of those types of women...HOWEVER I DO know some and for the life of me I have no idea why they are like that....but if you figure it out let me know please..
7 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Damn! You were supposed to be my saving grace and skillfully explain the complexities here so I may sleep in peace once more..... Yes, we shall both patiently wait for the oracle to emerge on this one I guess. lol. Thanks for responding and at least it is good to know that you appear to be an exception to this behavioural rule!
6 people like this
@Wizzywig (7859)
14 Sep 08
Well, in our house, we dont sit thru the commercials. We either record the programme and 'fast forward' or my husband (because, lets face it, men feel the need to have the control buttons grafted onto their hands) channel-hops. I'd say, why is it, that, if I miss the first 10minutes of something (since I have more demanding things to do than slob out in front of the telly) I then have to miss the next bit to have those 10 minutes (which I have heard from any other room of the house due to the volume) explained.... it doesn't matter too much because, chances are, I'll fall asleep halfway through anyway!
6 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Firstly, let me just confirm that yes, us men MUST have the remote control at all times. It is an extension of ourselves and allows us to feel like a God! It is actually one of the rare things in this world that allows us to actually control something so please try not to touch it! lol. I am a bit of a channel hopper too actually; but it does sound like you seem to spend a bit of your time in another room so this scenario is borderline perfect! Thanks for responding and reme,ber - DON'T touch the remote!
4 people like this
@Wizzywig (7859)
14 Sep 08
I have told him so many times where he could stick the controls that I very rarely touch them, & certainly not without gloves, just incase he actually has taken my advice!!!
5 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Oh we KNOW when you've touched the remote. It's like a subliminal sixth sense or something! I am pretty sure that there is no such thing sa a remote being lost in the couch and there are far more sinister activities afoot! I think that every remoted control sold should come with a fingerprint kit.....
4 people like this
• Philippines
14 Sep 08
Two reasons, i guess. One: Because men do not talk to and with them when the TV is off and do not orient them their "rules" before watching the movie, or why doesn't he just tell her to "just watch and i will explain everything later" or "here's the synopsis, questions will be received/entertained after the show." Two: It is probably a woman's way of telling her man "i am here, be WITH me," or subconciously she is competing against the TV/movie for your UNDIVIDED attention and interest. :) Just guesses.
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Well I am happy that we have finally received an attempt at an explanation! OK, fair point and I agree that some of us are not the best communicators at times but if we could talk during commercials rather then during the show we may just come back to life! Second point..... We ARE with you! We are happy to sit there quietly and even snuggle up if you wish; but we just want to watch together, especially the beginning because it sets the storyline for the whole movie in most cases! I think too that if I were to lay down rules first I would probably get shot! Thanks for responding and I appreciate some insight finally!
4 people like this
• Philippines
14 Sep 08
What's your wife's favorite snacks? Something that will keep her munching all throughout a show? (lol). Seriously, the "cuddling" part you mentioned doesn't have to be asked first. Maybe you just have to cuddle her as soon as the show starts. And tell her honestly about how you want this "date" to be. And promise her that you will watch that show/movie again and that time would be "ask/talk all you want" movie night.
5 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Oh I am happy to talk non-stop if it's a "chick flick"! Yes, I will try the snacks diversion next time I think!
4 people like this
• Canada
14 Sep 08
1st up,thank ya kindly for putting down women.sounds like your a typical man.we women are who we are whether you like it our not.we are entitled to have our say when we want to.men tend to be the ones who complain.if it wasnt for your mother you wouldnt be here.so suck it up and deal with it.we arent going to change.i tend to feel like if i talk then thats when people will notice me more.
5 people like this
@VE3IYB (209)
• Canada
14 Sep 08
Yes please respond to answer these important questions! My wife does this too and it drive me around the bend. Come to think of it maybe thats WHY she does it... Hmmm that would explain a lot.
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Ah! So there is some method in the madness then? Maybe it's a global female conspiracy! lol. Thanks for responding.
4 people like this
@wildplace (154)
• Germany
14 Sep 08
Saw that on a BBC documentary. They said, it is because women socialize by the spoken word. So, if she is talking to you, she only let you know that she is friendly and not willing to kill you. Should be some ancestor thing. Silence was the voice of trouble ahead...
5 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
So there is even a documentary covering this? Excellent! It's a shame I missed it then and I doubt it would ever be shown here unfortunately. So if she is silent then I am about to die??? lol. I will be more careful in future! Thanks for responding.
4 people like this
@bombshell (11266)
• Germany
14 Sep 08
yes i do the same to my husband.and do you know why we do that?we need attention.
4 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Fair enough. So talk all you like in the commercials and we shall talk back! lol. We are happy to meet you halfway, no problem! Thanks for responding.
3 people like this
@bombshell (11266)
• Germany
14 Sep 08
welcome james.
4 people like this
@mjhicks (319)
• United States
15 Sep 08
This so funny... My husband and I are just the opposite of most couples. He's the talker and I'm the channel hopper. My mother in law says my husband should have been born a woman, loves to talk, loves to shop. He will start talking about some mundane thing while I'm trying to watch a favorite program or a bit of some interesting news so I'll say 'wait I want to hear this." He will get frustrated and leave the room only to be back within 2 minutes mouth open jabbering about something else. go figure lol
2 people like this
@anne12d (676)
• Philippines
14 Sep 08
I'm a girl. Hmmm... On the first question, I haven't done such thing... Well, maybe your girl needs your attention, because maybe when your watching your favorite show you don't seem to be disturb even for a second... (just a maybe) On the second question.... I haven't done such thing also, because when my guy and I decided to watch a movie we agreed to watch the movie we like.. So during the movie, we really watch... and when there are questions or misheard wording on the movie we ask each other... Can I ask? have you given your girl her time where you two were not interrupted by any means? Because if you have time with her, she would ask for your attention. I don't mean to get involve with your problem... I'm just curious...
4 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Lol. Firstly let me point out that this is NOT a serious issue by any means but is just a humourous observation! My wife and I were joking about this and I thought I would put forward the questions. This is purely in relation to TV and no other area..... Thank you for responding and I hope I have satisified your curiosity!
3 people like this
@anne12d (676)
• Philippines
14 Sep 08
I'm not that serious... hahahahah!!! But in reality, a lot of couple experienced these kind of situation... right?! hahahahaha...
4 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Yes it does seem to be a common trait! My wife does it..... my Mother does it..... my Sister does it! Maybe there is a secret sisterhood academy that teaches this or something?
3 people like this
@cortjo73 (6500)
• United States
14 Sep 08
Some suggestions: Get a TiVo or other kind of DVR and just hit pause when your lady friend decides it is time to start jabbering away during your shows. Then, pick different ladies to hang out with. I am not one of these ladies you are referring to. I guess I could be while watching TV if I didn't have a TiVo with which I can pause the program to say whatever is on my mind. But, I don't talk during a movie. I don't like to miss anything and, since I can't pause the movie in a theater, I just keep my mouth shut. And, I always get annoyed with the other people in the theater that are talking. I don't like to make a pain out of myself so, I do my best not to. Sorry...I really don't have an answer to your question other than to say that we are not all like the ladies you referenced. LOL!
4 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
I can't stand people talking in a movie theatre either. OK, I will have to check out TiVo I think! And as for hanging out with different ladies? NO chance! I don't think there is any real answer to this behavioural conundrum actually but I sure have enjoyed seeking one with everybody! Thanks for responding.
3 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36489)
• United States
14 Sep 08
that is really something to fuss about. they could be out doing alot of other things that might bug you more. ever think about that? if that's all u have to gripe about that your lady is doing you are lucky.
4 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Nah, this is nothing I really fuss about that much and my wife and I joke about it a lot actually! We both have our own little idiosyncrasies; this is just one that I find amusing and wished to share. I am finding it interesting when people see this as a gripe because my tongue is firmly planted in my cheek! Thanks for responding.
3 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32271)
• United States
14 Sep 08
I think it's just a timer on our tongue or something. We could have the comnplete thought process of what we are going to say completed before the commercial even goes off, and yet we wait until the show is on to talk. I do it, and I won't deny it. I don't know why I do it, and it bothers me that I do because I am one of those who ask my fiance "What just happened? I mean, what is this woman to that man?" lol, so yea, my mind wanders. Maybe women are just a little more adhd then we are willing to admit!
4 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Tongue timers! lol. I think that generally speaking us men wins hand down when it comes to erratic minds and keeping attention but as soon as the TV is on the roles reverse! Thanks for responding and for truthfully admitting that this is indeed something that happens and proving that I am not just making this stuff up!
3 people like this
@berrys (865)
• Singapore
14 Sep 08
LOLS!!! you have poor luck. but i can tell you that i don't bother my man with such cause just like you, I think people should only talk during commercials. Don't disturb when your watching a movie, If i have a question I'd probably wait for the show to finish then I'd ask, so I don't disturb him during the movie. and the final thing that i cannot stand is that when a man thinks his odering desert your gonna mooch of him so you don't have to order your own. HELLO guys!!!! we don't want your desert!!! we want to be close to you!
4 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Whoo hoo! Have you ever considered starting classes to teach other women your methods? I reckon men would pay a FORTUNE to send their wives! lol. I am actually OK with the dessert thing if we get to share each others..... We can still be close then but have the two desserts! It's a territorial thing! Thanks for responding.
3 people like this
@camomom (7537)
• United States
14 Sep 08
i honestly don't know why that happens i think its just coincedence as far as the commercial thing. i on the other hand do not do this either. my fiance does it to me...all of the above. i think he's the girl and i'm the guy sometimes.
3 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
15 Sep 08
Coincidence? Are you sure it's not part of some global and grand female plan? Thanks for responding!
@camomom (7537)
• United States
18 Sep 08
hmmmm. i'll never tell, maybe, maybe not.
1 person likes this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
18 Sep 08
Keep it to yourself then! Our manly indifference will draw it out eventually!
@ronaldinu (12445)
• Malta
14 Sep 08
What you wrote illustrate the complex relationship between a man and a woman. if you had to boil it down, women demand attention. I have a solution for your situation. What about hearing the movie on headphones. You can always pretend that you are not hearing her :)
3 people like this
• United States
14 Sep 08
Pretend? Since guys don't listen anyway, why would they have to pretend not to hear?
3 people like this
• United States
14 Sep 08
Yes, James, I know hearing and listening are not the same thing.
2 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Been there, tried that! They SEE the headphones so it doesn't really work! The best thing is to master "The nod"..... This seems to be quite effective at times! Thanks for responding and God help you if you ever try the headphones ploy yourself! lol.
2 people like this
• United States
14 Sep 08
I don't really believe that you are going to get a real answer to your questions, Darlin. We do what we do because men do what they do. Maybe we just do it to drive you crazy, the same way you men drive us crazy by hogging the remote, then jump around from program to program, just as we decide we might be a little bit interested in where you landed for more than 2 seconds.
3 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Oh the joys of the genders! We switch channels repeatedly because we have this uncanny ability to absorb MASSIVE amounts of information very quickly; did you not know this? It is one of those man mysteries that only WE know the answer to..... Such as us being fast asleep in front of the TV and you change the channel or turn it off and we will immediately wake up and tell you - "Hey! I was WATCHING that!" lol. Thanks for responding and like I said in an earlier reply; leave the remote alone and all will be fine!
3 people like this
• United States
14 Sep 08
Yeah, I have my own remote, thank you very much!*LOL* And, if men have the ability to retain massive bits of information, why is it that they can not remember something their wives told them five minutes before, hmmmmmm? *L*
3 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
14 Sep 08
Your own remote??? What IS this madness?? lol. It is the beginning of the end of civilization as we know it.....
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@likaes (496)
• Singapore
15 Sep 08
Haha, wow. I've never noticed the first thing you mentioned myself, but the second thing I can relate totally. They will normally be clueless about the entire movie wondering who is the "good" or "bad" guy, and trying to figure out the plot. They'll bug you about it too throughout the whole movie. Sorry I can't help you out here - I'm trying to wrap my head around the reason why they do this too.
3 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
15 Sep 08
Hmmmm.. You have probably missed noticing the first part because the women are talking way too much for you to be able to think straight! lol. Thanks for responding and if you DO figure it out don't forget to share!
2 people like this
@liquorice (3901)
15 Sep 08
We women are probably clueless because we're often nice enough to go to see an action or alien film because it's what you men want to see (am I being sexist here? I just associate these as being "male" films from experience, but I get that that's not always the case!) As it's not our first choice of film and we might find it a bit boring at times we may kind of zone in and zone out, thinking of the other, more important things that we women thing about! But then we remember that we're supposed to be watching the film, and we just need a re-cap every so often. It's sort of equivalent behaviour to us dragging you to a chick flick and noticing that you've fallen asleep 10 minutes into the film. At least we make an effort to watch the film!
1 person likes this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
15 Sep 08
I am lucky I think because my wife probably enjoys action and scary films etc more than I do! lol. I will watch the occasional chick flick.... I watched the Notebook the other day for the first time and thought it was great! I draw the line at musicals though!
1 person likes this
• Lubbock, Texas
14 Sep 08
"Why is it that us men can be sitting quietly through TV commercials yet the MINUTE the show we are watching comes back on, women decided right there and then to start a conversation" Sorry James, t'ain't true at all!!! Not for me anyway. Of course I don't have a husband (thanks be), but my kids, male and female, were guilty of this very behavior when they lived at home. Now if my favorite show is on, DON'T TALK TO ME, and don't talk to someone else so loud I can't hear the TV, or I will rip your head off and stuff it down your throat! Can you tell I'm not a typical female?
3 people like this
• United States
14 Sep 08
AND, she even tells people, Don't call me on this night, or that night between this time and that time. She's really rather mean, if you do!
2 people like this
• Lubbock, Texas
15 Sep 08
See? She's even afraid of me over the phone!
1 person likes this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
15 Sep 08
Hey! At least if you ripped my head off and shoved it down my throat it would be nice and QUIET for a while! Thanks for responding and yes, it DOES seem you have managed to create a whole new genus of female altogether here! lol.
@mimpi1911 (25454)
• India
15 Sep 08
Since you hear and not listen, I would be as brief as possible. 1. Simple, we find commercials more interesting than the shows you are addicted to. In most cases they are wacky. 2. That's because you men have an inherent tendency to sleep through the movies and and we women tend to save you from it.
3 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
15 Sep 08
Well actually this time I have to READ so it is a whole different thing entirely! lol. It has already been stated that commercials are interesting because it is like window shopping! And I don't sleep through movies so there! Thanks for responding and stop making excuses mimpi! It is what it is!
@apsara60 (6612)
• Israel
15 Sep 08
Ha ha ha .......James, I can understand you.This is routine in our house......This happens because ...when men are watching TV then you men are really sticking to your place, but when we women are watching TV at the same time we are doing hundreds of other work in the kitchen and in the house so that when you have finished enjoying your TV, we are ready to please your stomach with tasty hot food, and your beds are well arranged and ready when you want to enjoy your sleep......so while doing all this we miss some part of the program and asks questions and you men feel we are such a pain in the neck.......lol....... Nice discussion.......Have a great day.
3 people like this
@James72 (26832)
• Australia
15 Sep 08
Oh we do many things at once too! We are thinking about sports; and thinking about women and thinking about many other things at the same time as well. It's not easy you know! lol. Thnaks for responding and I am happy that you have enjoyed the discussion.
1 person likes this