Tricky alliance
By zandi458
@zandi458 (28102)
Malaysia
September 28, 2008 11:48am CST
I am not very close to my brother's wife, but recently, she confided in me her problems with my brother and how she wishes he'd let her spend more money. I'm not sure what I should do.I'm definitely not going to take sides but should I tell my brother about this? What do you think, is it right for me to poke into their marriage and tell him what to do with his nagging wife?
3 people like this
8 responses
@revdauphinee (5703)
• United States
28 Sep 08
do not tell him anything if they are having trouble in their marriage you will only make it worse! also if you think she is a nagging wife I know its your brother but it is possible she may have some reason to nag!
2 people like this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
29 Sep 08
FIrst I would find out what more she wants to buy.
My neices x would only give her so much money for groceries. like $25 a week back in the 70s. They had 3 kids us 2 and I spent way more than that. She would have to buy mostly beans and taters to make the meals go thru the wekk then he would complain that she wasnt cooking enough or she wasnt makeing different food . He was getting tired of the same old food every day.
My hubby finally had to tell him to give her more money for the groceries if he wanted different foods .
But if it is for clothes that she dont need then that would be different.
1 person likes this
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
29 Sep 08
[i]Hi zandi,
I do know what is right but when I am in your situation, I will not talk to my brother about it..I will let them discuss and settle their problems...The problem is about money and for sure, the wife is also opening this issue to your brother and maybe your brother has a valid reason for controlling her about "money spending"...[/i]
1 person likes this
@angel_of_charm (4134)
• Philippines
28 Sep 08
hard to say really...its so hard to interfere with others marriage even if he is your brother...but if your that close and you think you can talk about the matter to your brother maybe you wanna talk things out to him...he might listen and do something to fix it but i hope they wont fight because of it
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
28 Sep 08
Oh no!! I would not tell my brother if his wife confided in me about anything because it could cause a rift between the two of you and you don't need that. She married your brother, hopefully because she loves him and so it's her problem to deal with it, not yours. Besides that, she could turn on you too and you could lose them both. It's just not worth it.
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
29 Sep 08
Exactly right. I hope she didn't expect you to say anything because you shouldn't. When my brother was married to his second wife, sometimes she'd come over crying her heart out and all I could do is be there for her but I had to be very careful in what I said to her because I didn't want to put any thoughts in her head that would or could haunt me later on down the road. It's a hard spot to be put in but sometimes you have to weigh things out and see what's best for YOU and in this case, it's best to keep quiet.
1 person likes this
@deebomb (15304)
• United States
28 Sep 08
I'ed not say any to ether one of them. If you do you could only add fuel to the fire and nether one one would appreciate it. For all you know this could just be a one time complaint. Just listen to her. She may just need to talk to some one. I see you don't like her but still she is your brother's wife. This is their problem.
'Be kinder than necessary;
for everyone you meet is
fighting some kind of battle
