Why are people obsessed with beauty?
By TessWhite
@TessWhite (3146)
United States
October 3, 2008 10:33am CST
Just now I was flipping thru the TV channels and I just had to dash in here and create this discussion. One of the shopping channels was selling makeup - for your legs. Thats right, cover up make up to put on your legs to hide blemishs or scars. Are they kidding?
This reminds me of something that happened to me a year ago. Two years ago I had surgery to repair a tendon in my leg. I have two scars on my foot and my leg from the surgery. While at the pool last year a woman approached me and asked me if I was embaressed for people to see my scar? I was shocked. I looked at her and said of course I'm not embaressed! I'm just grateful to be able to walk!
Why are the people in this world so obsessed with beauty? Don't they realize that beauty isn't on the outside, but rather its who we are inside that makes us beautiful? When my mom fought cancer she lost so much weight, her hair, and even several of her teeth. She said one day "I must look awful." I gave her a kiss on the cheek and told her no, she was beautiful. And to me she was. My mom was the most unselfish person I've ever known. She helped anyone she could and as she said many times "never met a stranger" (meaning she got to know everyone).
People need to realize its the good things they do in this world that make them beautiful people. Their outter beauty will fade as they age, but its their soul that makes them wonderful. Are you one of those people who think beauty is on the outside? Do you hide every flaw or imperfection from others? Or do you go out bravely in the world not hiding scars, and knowing its who you are that makes you beautiful?
3 people like this
18 responses
@greyy21 (181)
• Ireland
3 Oct 08
I think that people are so obsessed with beauty because they want to feel good about themselves, there seems to be few people that are happy with the way they look.
I dont hide my scars, i dont even notice scars on other people till they mention them. Im not saying i like my scars, in truth I used to really dislike them because it reminded me of bad times but i just dont care anymore, really xD
I do admit to wearing make up and all that but it's part of my image ;P that and purple hair but it's not to hide anything~
You're mom sounds like a great woman i think
1 person likes this
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
3 Oct 08
Thanks, yes my mom was a great woman, loved by many. Glad you don't hide yourself, and great on the purple hair! I've been wanting to dye one streak of hot pink, but haven't found the courage. LOL
1 person likes this
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
4 Oct 08
Hi tess! Yes I am afraid to say that I do go out with
flaws and all. In fact, I have a story about this very
thing. I am in the process of having all my teeth on the
top of my mouth extracted. I have had problems that have
caused me to have all but 4 teeth pulled recently. I am
walking around with only 4 teeth and have just about
forgotten about it until yesterday when I was cruelly
reminded of this fact. I was in a store where a friend of
mine worked to get a new cartridge for my printer. He told
me later on that this young girl made a nasty comment about
me. It was a girl that he dated and was no longer seeing.
She did not know that we were friends because he was doing
me a favor and didn't want anyone in the store to know that
we were friends. He is the store manager. She said that
I "wanted" him because I kept looking at him! Then she made
a comment about my not having any teeth! Well my friend
said she was wrong and not to talk about the customers like
that. He is quite a bit younger than me, but has a crush
on me! Well I was upset to say the least! I had kind of
forgotten how I looked and this reminded me. I am getting
my dentures 4 days after my birthday on October 14th. I
am scared and upset that I have to wear dentures, but I
have no choice. I will be getting the last 4 teeth extracted
on that day too. So, it is a good thing that I am not vain.
I don't try to hide my imperfections, what is the point!
But that comment did hurt! So for the next week I will be
more award of keeping my mouth shut!
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
4 Oct 08
Awwww, I'm sorry she hurt your feelings. He should have kept quiet and just not told you. People can be cruel. I myself struggle with my weight. I use a scooter to shop with because of health problems, not the weight. But once in a store a man said loudly to his wife - if she wasn't so heavy she wouldn't need the cart. She shusshed him, but I heard it. It made me mad enough that I made sure to run over his foot as I passed him by. LOL People need to look beyond these things and see who we truely are.
@cassandralynn (1084)
• United States
3 Oct 08
Beauty on the outside fades over time. People shouldn't be too obsessed over physical looks all the time. I mean it's pretty silly to layer on the make-up just to visit the corner store for 5 minutes..You can't take it with you also when you die, so people should practice being beautiful on the inside more and treat people with respect and be kind and leave a more positive presents on this planet then worrying about what's on the outside all the time.
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
3 Oct 08
Now, I have begun to love myself even when I have no lipstick on. I have scars on my body, but I am still classified as being beautiful. People see me, but not my outside. My beauty radiates from the inside of me.. People just want to see what looks good. It is appealing to them, so that is why they have an obsession about it.
1 person likes this
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
3 Oct 08
I'm glad you realize what counts most. Thanks for the reply.
1 person likes this
@jstmarfz (1498)
• United States
3 Oct 08
I am concious with the scars I had in my face cause of MMR or chicken pox when I was a kid. I want to get rid of it. Especially with into my legs. I am not obsessed but that makes me feel conscious every time I wear shorts. Especially on my face, it makes my self esteem low. I just want to get rid of it to make my skin clear and clean. If there are medicine who can take it off, I would buy for it.
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
3 Oct 08
If your tiny scars are causing that much low self esteem then you need to work on your self esteem, not your scars. I have scars all over - numerous surgeries here. Do you think that makes up what kind of person I am? No. They are just scars. People who focus on looks only when they see you are shallow, and a waste of time knowing. You need to focus on your good personality traits and stop worrying about tiny scars that make no difference in who you truely are.
@leenie50 (3992)
• United States
5 Oct 08
Hey Tess
Excellent post. It still blows me away how vain people are. My twin sister is a perfect example. She won't step foot out of her home until she is dressed from head to toe. She's had a couple of alterations, I will call it. She used to constantly laugh at me because of something I was wearing and still does on occasion. She used to make fun of my hair because it didn't look like hers all curled, teased and sprayed to perfection. Makeup? You can't wear enough in her opinion. It drives her crazy that I won't be more like her. My whole life growing up in her shadow taught me to be myself, no matter what. This is what God created and this is who I am.
leenie@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
5 Oct 08
Bravo Leenie. Glad you feel you can be yourself. Thats the way it should be with everyone. Thanks for your response. :)
@sharra1 (6340)
• Australia
4 Oct 08
I do not know the answer to this. I have never liked make and hardly ever wear it. I have also stopped dying my hair as I am not ashamed to be Grey. Oh well I used to die it until I hurt my arm a year ago and now I am letting it stay that way. These people are also scared of growing old and that is something they cannot stop.
I agree with you that true beauty is in a person's character not in their skin, it is shown in their deeds in their personality and by how they treat others. I have seen people who look beautiful but inside they are ugly and nasty.
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
4 Oct 08
Thanks for the reply. It sounds like you understood the point I was making. :)
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
4 Oct 08
hi tesswhite there are some mylotters who protest when I state my age, but I am not ashamed to be elderly, with some wrinkles and white hair. I wo rked hard in my life, and earned every one of thosewrinkles.I do not dye my hair, and I use a minimum of cosmetics. I have to wear ugley boot type ortho shoes with a brace built in for my bad left foot. Now I dont think they make me look ugly as myoutside is not what makes me a good or bad person, but what is on my inside. When I got the brace it was either the brace or not being able to walk at all, as I had an old injury, a ru ptured tendon that healed all wrong.So I was glad to be able to walk. If I am a good decent compassionate kind of person I think that will matter more than if I am a real aged beauty queen.
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
4 Oct 08
((((( Hatley ))))) I haven't seen you, but I think you are beautiful. I've seen enough of your comments and discussions here to know you are a kind soul. Flaunt those wrinkles and gray hair. I know I flaunt my wrinkles, because you are right, we earned them!
@hotsummer (13835)
• Philippines
4 Oct 08
i am afraid for other people to see my physical scars. cause i wanted them to see me as beautiful. but i do agree that true beuaty lies deep with our souls and not just superficial beauties that our physical eyes can see. anyways, i think that many people are guilty of it many times. it is hard not to judge with their appearance. cause our nature is just like that we judge people by their looks and their outward appearance.
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
4 Oct 08
Well I hope that one day you can overcome your fear of showing your scars. Each scar is proof of a battle won. I'm not ashamed of my scars, because I know its something I went thru, so that I can still be here today.
@wiseshopping1 (679)
• China
4 Oct 08
yes, you are right, outter beauty will fade as they age, but its their soul that makes them wonderful. my personality is same as you. i like thing happens naturally. all beauty can't bear time passing. everybody will be old. at the time, who has the capital to care about each other?
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
4 Oct 08
Thank you for your response, and for understanding my point.
@AndrewFreyne (6281)
• United Kingdom
4 Oct 08
Beauty is a beautiful thing! It's nice to look after yourself and show your body that you care! I don't think that it's an obsession to want to look your best, especially when you are out in public and amongst other people! As you say, there is also beauty of the character! If someone is very nice and caring deep inside then this person has beauty deep inside of themselves! That must have been an embarassing moment for you by the pool side! That woman was a little cheeky, quite insensitive too I think. Beauty holds many different views for many different people. I guess the important thing to remember is that you always think the best about yourself. Andrew
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
4 Oct 08
Actually, I wasn't the least bit embaressed by her comment at the pool. I was amazed at her stupidity, and I think she was the one embaressed when I told her I am grateful to walk, let alone swim. Showing my body I care has nothing to do with trying to make myself beautiful for the world I pass by. As for thinking the best of myself, for the most part I do. I know I am a good person. And thats more important to me.
@belk89 (1103)
• Philippines
3 Oct 08
Some people are obsessed with beauty but not all. Because of television and all the things that were shown that makes people think that when you look good more people would start to like you and adore you which is totally wrong. Some people can also be too vain to the extent that they dont want other people to see a single scar or pimple on there face or any parts of there body. They didnt realized that this commercials and surgeries are created to make them think that to be happy in life you need to look good in the outside. So you will be interested of buying there product and spending your money on surgeries.
But the truth is no matter how we try to keep ourselves looking young there would come a time that we can no longer hide our age nor have a perfect skin for the rest of our lives. Outside beauty will never last. What is important is the good things you did for other people. The good deeds that you have done for other people will never be forgotten but the beauty you have on the outside will eventually fade away and nobody would even remember how pretty you use to be.
@Metalchick (1391)
•
4 Oct 08
I wouldn't say I was obsessed with beauty but as a child growing up I was always a very shy and quiet person well I was till people got to know me at least. When I discovered make-up in my early teens it was an instant confidence boost and that's solely why I use it today. I know it's a little sad to say but wearing the stuff actually helps me hide a multitude of sins and I feel I can take on the world wearing it.
Have heard many people refer to make-up as a mask...a way of hiding behind it and dealing with the world on a day to day basis. I'm not quite as bad as that but I do feel naked going out without a little mascara or lippy. There's something about it that makes you feel just that little bit more femiinine when you've got it on.
My colleague at work recently had cancer and had to have a hysterectomy...straight after she had recovered she got her nails done, hair re-styled and induldged in a lot of health treatments and massages. She latter admited to me she did this because she felt unwomanly after losing what in some ways partly makes her a woman.
So in my opinion I do think some people take beauty to the extreme but in cases like me and my friend it's a form of confidence and a way to make you feel good about yourself.
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
4 Oct 08
There is nothing wrong with boosting your confidence. Or as in your friend's case to use it almost as a way of healing. I just like to see people that feel good about themselves even without the mask. It sounds like you have that going for you. I too usually wear a little makeup if I'm going out, but I don't feel I have to. I have also been seen without the makeup. It all comes down to feeling confident and good about ourselves, with and without the masks. Thanks for you comment.
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
4 Oct 08
Sorry, you missed the concept of inner beauty being more important.
@ellie333 (21016)
•
3 Oct 08
Hi Tess, I agree with you beauty lies within a person not what they are like on the outside eh! I am badly scarred but only noticable in a bikini but I always wore one and if people chose to stare that was here problem not mine as I am hapy also to be alive so a few scars mean nothing. I very rarely wear makeup and am happy with being me even the extra few pounds make me look healthy rather than guant. I don't watch these fashion, make-up type pogrammes and feel that teenagers that become obsessed with being the perfect figure look etc due to magazines and models miss out on so much FUN through being more obsessed in how they look than to have carefree fun with friends. Huggles. Ellie :D
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
3 Oct 08
Yes, being healthy is more important for sure. I can't stand to watch beauty pagents, or modeling shows. They only focus on the outter beauty rather than what these people are really like.
@guybrush (4658)
• Australia
3 Oct 08
I too think beauty is greatly overrated, and our scars are our rites of passage which show the battles we've been through to make us what we are. When I see the cosmetics listed in newspapers, with one sort for face in daytime, one for nighttime, one for the skin around the eyes ... (a chemist admitted the other day the skin around the eyes is the same as the skin everywhere else, and doesn't need its own special cream) - I'm appalled at how women in particular are being ripped off by believing the latest so-called beauty lies. I'm happy just to be clean - and I barely worry about any sort of makeup these days!
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
3 Oct 08
Very true. I guess thats how I look at my scars on my legs. A rite of passage. A battle won. I too rarely bother with makeup, and if I do wear it its very minimal. I just couldn't believe seeing makeup to put on your legs. That was amazing to me. People will buy anything I guess.
@welawai (102)
• Mali
3 Oct 08
As someone already said, people just want see what looks good, that's true, we don't like to look at some scary, ugly things, because it's scary and ugly. You know TV made us carring, we care what people say, we even think for them(not all of us of course)Also true is that we are not greatful. Well I like myself I think I am the most beautiful person I know :) I am selfish, that's right and I feel okey about that, I think everybody is selfish, because for example when somebody is carring about you scars or something they actually(most of the time) they just carring about themself, because they want see pretty thing and scars(they can be ugly as well) anyway all this obsession are because of TV, we are watching at all this model things, all this movie storys stuff, you know there is everthing almost perfect, even scars looks nice :D:D but it doesn't really matters how good looking you are when you very ugly inside, because inside comes out everytime and even you look so pretty, everybody can see you ugly and it happens because the most beautiful persons(good looking types) they cares the most and that's why they notice all the scars on other people.
@mojcica (1511)
• Slovenia
3 Oct 08
I totally agree with you, people are getting shallow. Being preoccupied with money and beauty (they suppose to go hand in hand).
Its sad hearing a 3y old telling her mother 'mummy aunty ugly'. I heard that the other day. I couldnt belive it, a 3y old showed with a finger to one girl passing them and told her mum she was ugly. That only means that child's head was already filled with importance of beauty and also learned what is and isnt beautiful. You can imagine this child as grown up and what his prioryties are going to be.
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
3 Oct 08
That is sad. Unfortunately I think my ex daughter in law is raising my grandchildren this way too. The ex is obsessed with beauty and looks. I can't wait to move closer so I can have another view point or role model for my grandchildren.
