How many years was your longest relationship?

Philippines
January 22, 2009 6:28pm CST
My sister had an 8-year old relationship. They had lived together and the only thing that lacks them is marriage. Our whole family had accepted his man completely. I was even yearning for being the bridesmaid already.But, so unexpectedly, they separated. Eight years was so long enough right? It was a very long investment of time and resources at that. Everybody thought that theirs will be a happy ending. Well, that's life, so many twists and turns.They are not really made for each other. I realized that a relationship can not still be measured through quantity,
8 people like this
41 responses
@Aurone (4758)
• United States
23 Jan 09
I think sometimes we just get used to one another and even though the relationship has stopped working, we stay together out of convinence. I was married 3.5 years and he just walked out. So being together a long time doesn't necessarily mean that you will be together forever, unfortunately people grow apart and relationships end.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
23 Jan 09
Things change and people do. We can never hold on to everything forever. We also have no control of other people's feelings. We should learn to love, let go and learn.Life is too short to worry over the past. Let's enjoy life and make ourselves happy.
1 person likes this
@Aurone (4758)
• United States
25 Jan 09
Thats all we can do.
@sr5367 (8)
• United States
23 Jan 09
i was with my ex-husband for 23 years, from age 22 to 45. and even now, as i look back on it, i find it hard to believe the time passed so quickly. it's kind of strange being alone, or rather, single now after so many years. it's not an easy adjustment to make when you are used to being part of a couple for so long. there are a lot of things i had to learn to do for myself like cutting the grass, fixing the toilet so it didn't keep running after i flushed it, cleaning out the gutters, haggling with contractors, washing and maintaining the car service schedule, moving heavy furniture...you know, guy stuff. in return, i no longer have to fight over the remote control, entertain his friends and family, pick up behind him, fight over the covers in bed, clean toothpaste spit out of the sink, or put the toilet seat down before sitting, (and yes, fellas, it IS a big deal!) all in all, not a bad trade-off :-)
1 person likes this
• Philippines
23 Jan 09
At least you have moved on. Letting go is hard but it will just going to take time over until you get back to your own feet. Its not just an overnight adjustment right? Until one day, you just wake up and letting go hurts no more.
• Singapore
23 Jan 09
Hi, my longest relationship is with my husband. Know him when i was 16 and i'm now 30, so in total 14 years invested in 1 man. I'm still with him and in a happy marriage but we have our ups and now. We do quarrel and sometime quite fiercely with each other. But he love me as much as I love him. I think the most important thing is communication and understanding. Our characters has changed since the first day we meet each other. Till now, we still enjoy sharing things with each other and being together. Relationship can be measured by quantity if it's come hand in hand with quality.
1 person likes this
@annjilena (5621)
• United States
23 Jan 09
my longest relationship was 30 years.my latest relationship is 4 years and a half
@annjilena (5621)
• United States
23 Jan 09
married for 20 years dated 10 years
• United States
23 Jan 09
My longest relationship is still going on. I am married and have been for 36 years now. With the first man I married. He is my best friend and my soul mate. No it doesn't matter how long a couple is married there is the chance of them separating or divorcing. My husband and I have always worked through the tough time never giving in. We believe that marriage is something that takes work. And it is worth it to work through times of trouble.
• Philippines
23 Jan 09
You both surely are perfectly matched to be together. Good for you both. Not all marriages happen to be as successful as yours. In the future, I hope I will also be meeting the man of my life.That would surely be a fairytale come true.
• United States
25 Jan 09
The longest one I have ever been in is the one I am in now. This is our tenth year together. I have never had a relationship that lasted anywhere near this long before. I know that I will always fight to keep this relationship going, if things ever got rough. He is the one person I can depend on, and my best friend. Being in a relationship for a long time does not mean it is a good one though, I have just lucked out in that regard. For some people, relationships change as they do. Some people just are not able to make the relationship change with them.
@kellys3ps (3732)
• United States
24 Jan 09
My husband and I have been married for 8 and a half years. We have been together for nine years now, and that is my longest relationship.
• Romania
24 Jan 09
My longest relationship was 6 years and is still going, and is great.
• Philippines
24 Jan 09
So your sister is a "he?" Referring to "Our whole family had accepted his man completely." So that's just confusing, or maybe it's just a typo. Well, my younger sister and her bf have been together for 8 years too since High School, they've broke up before back in their College and got back again. I don't think that time has wasted here, cause you gain experience and it is bound to happen. It's just hard that you have to get through it that way, but like as you said, that's what life is all about. We have to deal with it.
@Bluepatch (2482)
• Trinidad And Tobago
23 Jan 09
I have a sister with a nine year relationship that ended and less than one year later started with her husband. They now have been married for obout fifteen years and have three children. I also had a friend with a fifteen year relationship that ended and he is now married for nearly twenty years to the girlfriend he had before that. Life is indeed strange or illogical at times but they do say you never know what passes between two people. And, I guess, that's true.
• United States
23 Jan 09
I had to end a 19 year marriage in 2008...We're still good friends.You're right, it is investment of time,but you lean along the way.Hopeful..we're both better people for the caring and sharing over the years.
@Crocket (315)
• Canada
23 Jan 09
One thing I have come to realize is we must learn from our defeats and except what has happened. Yes, it is true that eight years is a long time but then another eight years could only have been misery. Let us learn to move on to bigger and better things and we will all find a happy ending. Crocket.
• Philippines
23 Jan 09
Yes, it is true that a relationship cannot be measured through its length of affair. It always depends on the situation. Sometimes it is God's will that a relationship would last long forever or the opposite way. We cannot really predict the situation. Having an 8-year-old relationship is already long enough. Within that length of years, it is not very easy to break up with your partner as both of you have shared lots of memories together which is really very hard to forget. That's why "true relationship" will not matter if it is a short or long relationship.
@breepeace (3028)
• Canada
23 Jan 09
My longest relationship was just shy of 3 years (we split in February, and our 3 years anniversary was in May). Not very long, but at 25, seems like a healthy length of time for my longest relationship.
@borgborg (821)
• Philippines
23 Jan 09
That is so sad but it does happen... I heard a lot of people that though they've been in the relationship for quite a long time, still they didn't end up together. I hope our relationship won't be like that. I really want us to stay together till the end... =)
@gemini_rose (16208)
23 Jan 09
My longest relationship is my current one, I have been with him for nearly 10 years and we have been married for nearly 8 years. Relationships are very hard to maintain, they take a lot of hard work and a lot of give and take but sometimes if only one is working hard then it will not work and sometimes no matter how hard people work at their relationships they just do not work. Hopefully mine will last for good!!
@patgalca (11799)
• Canada
23 Jan 09
My first real relationship was with my first husband. We were together for a year, living together for a year and married for six years. That is eight years altogether. Once he walked out that door I never saw him again. Right now I have been married to my current husband for 11+ years. We lived together for 2 years prior to that. Prior to THAT was a mess. We dated for 3 months when we first met, then broke up, continued on as friends and eventually developed a relationship again. Since the time we first hooked up we have been together for almost 17 years. Wow! That's this March. Gosh, if I point that out to him he may leave me! He was not one for long term commitments and didn't want or expect to have kids. Having kids changed all that for him. I can't understand people who stay together for so long without getting married and then ending it. It almost seems like they are just settling or are comfortable in a relationship and then suddenly decide they want something else. Even in marriages some people walk away too quickly. Relationships are about mutual respect, communication and compromise. If you have to agree to disagree, then that's what you do. I hate it that people give up too easily on their marriages. I take my marriage vows seriously and I wouldn't end it without doing everything in my power to make it work.
@ericajoyce (1749)
• Philippines
23 Jan 09
Hello rieru. You are right. It doesnt mean that when your relationship with your partner lasts long it doesnt necessarily mean that they really are meant for each other. Anything can happen, even the longest relationship can fall apart. My longest relationship was with my ex-boyfriend. We were together for 3 years. I thought that our relationship will last, I was wrong.
@mikkymyde (185)
• Nigeria
23 Jan 09
my relationship is 5yrs old now..although we had a break in between but now we are back and very strong..we'll be getting married soon..
@MissAmie (720)
• United States
23 Jan 09
Right now I'm in a marriage that has lasted 12 years and counting. We dated for 2 years before we were married, so that's a total of 14 years. I honestly believe that one main reason I'm still married today is becuase I was actually married and not just living together. I'm not opposed to couples living together, but as for me and my husband, I'm almost sure had it not been for the comittment we made to each other we wouldn't be together today. We have separated a total of 4 times during our marriage but each time we quickly realized that we just weren't meant to be apart. Plus, the fact that we have 2 children together makes them our priority. We both want our kids to grow up with both parents, so maybe we are willing to tolerate a little more from each other than other couples becuase we have talked about it and we are both in this marriage whole-heartedly becuase of our kids. But you are right....8 years is a LOT of time to throw away. I'm sorry for your sister.