Do you doubt your partner if he/she comes late in the night???

India
February 24, 2009 6:18am CST
I am not married yrt but I am going to be in the next year.So I am very curious to know what the people here in mylot think about it?? Happy myloting
12 responses
@lynnemg (4539)
• United States
24 Feb 09
It depends on how late it is and what th ecircimstances are. I trust my husband for the most part and do not think that he would ever cheat on me, but I have learned from previous experience that men do cheat. (So do women). So, when he goes out with the guys and tells me it will only be an hour and comes home three hours later, yes, I question him as to why. Knowing that there is absolutley no good reason for him to be out at midnight, I do doubt him a bit. Normally, his story checks out, and no, I don't just believe what his friends tell me. One problem that we tend to have is that he has a couple of single friends who do not understand that it is not okay for a married man to be out running around at all hours of the night. It does cause problems. The last time my husband was out really late, he got home at 2:30 in the morning. He left at 7:00 to hlp a friend move, or so the said. He did help a little, but ended up breaking up a fight, and dealing with a whole bunch of other things. I was pretty angy by 1:00 when I called him and he said he would be home in a few minutes. I was fuming by the time he walked in the door at 2:30! As I told him, no excuse would be good enough if that had been me. Unfortunately, when we have been burned in the past, we do tend to compare certain situations with the past, even if we do trust our partner completely. My husband claims that he told hs buddy to just bring him home several times that night and he wouldn't do it and kept making excuses. I told my husband that he could have called and I would have gone to pick him up. At the very least, he could have called and let me know what was going on. My husband knows that as much as I do live him, if he is not home whe I go to bed, chances are, I will lock the door and he will be stuck sleeping on the porch. He would do the same thing to me.
• India
26 Feb 09
THanks for responding
@rmuxagirl (7568)
• United States
24 Feb 09
I don't doubt my partner when he comes home late or doesn't call. I admit there was a time this past week that I just like freaked out and I shouldn't have. I got myself all worked up over nothing and may have made him even more mad at me.
@UK_Shree (3604)
24 Feb 09
Well I am not married. But even so, if my partner came home late, I would just ask them why and not accuse them of anything. If it kept on happening again and again, then I would start asking more questions, especially if they were coming home late without good reason.
@forslahiri (1042)
• India
24 Feb 09
Hi, TRUST is the Basic of this sacred relationship. Suspicion is the SIN.... As far as I'm concerned,SHE is above these petty things!!hehe!! =Lahiri,Kolkata,India.
@syankee525 (6295)
• United States
24 Feb 09
not at all, if she tells me where she was going first of all. and my wife don't question me because she knows if i go out and say i be home at 10 that mean anytime after 11 lol.. but like last week i was running late from coming home from collage she called to make sure i was ok
• Philippines
24 Feb 09
I do trust my hubby. Trust, respect and communication is important in a relationship. You cannot built trust if you don't have a good communication and respect with the person. If ever my hubby comes to home late, i am not angry because in the first place, he would tell me immediately or he will call me if he thinks that he will come home late because of an emergency meeting or so. It is important that you trust and communicate well. These two goes hand in hand. And when he said to me that i will go home late, i will understand him and since he will also inform me what time will he be coming if he does have to go home late, so i am at least informed about it and this is important for me. If you value a person you love, you must inform her to where you at so she would not worry. For us, this is important.
@pickwick (858)
• India
24 Feb 09
I dont doubt my spouse when he comes home late at night but I worry a lot if he gets late.The roads here are not very safe and if its raning too at night, I keep on ringing him on his cell phone till he comes home.
@donsky14 (5963)
• Philippines
24 Feb 09
I have trust issues as well, because I've been cheated on a lot of times by previous boyfriends. But, I learned how to overcome that...cause I know how much my boyfriend loves me. So..if ever were gonna get married and he comes late at night, I'll be more worried than be suspicious.
@jerelena (19)
24 Feb 09
depends on what his doing. Some people honestly have to stay longer for work but at least you'll get a phone call. If he doesn't even bother to call you then follow you gut feeling because something is just not right~ especailly if it keeps happening.
• Philippines
24 Feb 09
Hmmm... It depends if your partner of course really has "business" because if he/she did, I'll probably let he/she off the hook because it will be completely irrational to get mad or light up dynamite for things like that. I don't want to sound like a pastor or anything but the core of every relationship my friend is "trust". If you don't have "trust" then basically you don't have a relationship. It's like you are saying you are human but you do not have a heart. So..lighten up my friend and trust your partner. Best wishes to both of you!
@vimalmeh (63)
• India
24 Feb 09
No, because I trust her.
• Australia
24 Feb 09
My first girlfriend cheated on me and ever since then I've just had really bad trust issues. I love my current girlfriend with all my heart and I trust her more than I've ever trusted anyone. And I strongly believe with my heart that she'd never cheat, and I at least know for certain if she ever did, she'd be honest with me about it. I do still have trust and jealousy issues though where my mind wanders and I'll think "where is she". I try really hard not to think like that, because she deserves better. She deserves my full trust and hasn't really ever done anything to break that trust.