Did you ever share about your old affairs with your partner?
By abhaijith
@abhaijith (2963)
India
6 responses
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
16 Mar 09
I think this is inviting problems if you are going to share old affairs with your present partner. What happened before is history and the new person in your life should come in as a fresh person and trying to be honest will only hurt the feelings. So it is better to keep past affairs under wrap and do not rock the cradle. Sometimes honesty is not always the best policy.
@abhaijith (2963)
• India
16 Mar 09
I dont agree with that , in my opinion it wont affect the relations. For a healthy relationship we should share all those things each other....
1 person likes this
@maean_19 (4655)
• Philippines
16 Mar 09
As for me, in the right and proper time. In my relationship, one way to build trust is to be truthful and open. My bf and I discussed about our pasts relationships. It is part of giving each other security and trust. It is better that way than keeping it a secret for a long time. You will never know, by keeping it, someone might spill out the news. Besides, discussing the past is a way of releasing you from it compared to keeping it as a secret, it would as if you are nurturing the memory.
@maean_19 (4655)
• Philippines
16 Mar 09
That is my opinion and am applying it in my relationship now. I feel more secured and confident that my bf won't cheat on me. Same with him. Openness and trust matters in a relationship. To share him my past would free us both from getting jealous or insecure of our exes. Past would always remain in the past. My present is more important.
@lynnemg (4529)
• United States
16 Mar 09
In my house, that is one of those, "don't ask,don't tell" subjects. We both know enough about each other's past to be comfortable enough and know that we don't care o hear any more. My husband tells me that as far as he is concerned, there was no one else in our lives before we found each other. I feel the same way.
@zhuhuifen46 (3483)
• China
16 Mar 09
It is better not do that. Having another person related with you, and vividly narrated by yourself, is somewhat like a sand in the eye. It will shed a shadow on your partner's all through her life. Sometimes, keeping the old affairs as privacy, whether good or bad, need control of will. Good will lies and silence are not behavior of dishonest but a sign of love. When one is hard to stand, why bother two to endure.
@abhaijith (2963)
• India
16 Mar 09
But friend,if you truely love your partner, you should share all those things with him/her,know?if you not,its a kind of cheating know?
@eabaterina (501)
• Philippines
16 Mar 09
we did and we both got jealous about each other's past so I feel that it is better to forget the past relationships and do not discuss them anymore =) it is healthier for the relationship to keep the past where it belongs. there is no need to discuss them anymore. what matters most is that we have each other now and we both love each other more than we loved our past relationships =)
@dismalgrin (2604)
• United States
16 Mar 09
I hate hearing about all those past relationships! Ack, it's enough to drive a girl crazy. "And this one screwed me over because she..." Stories drive me up the wall. Why, because naturally you have to figure they were intimate at one time. I'd rather not go there. Our relationships should be about the here and now. At least, that's how I keep it and I expect the same some the one I'm with.
