Answers based on emotion or research

United States
March 28, 2009 8:41pm CST
I've noticed a trend on certain topic areas or interests in Mylot since becoming a member. It seems certain topics are definately hot buttons for people and answered from their emotional side rather then from the side of research or even reading the post at hand, or articles related to it. I've noticed for example that on some threads where the poster has put up a link that many of the times readers skip right over it and won't take the time to make reference to it. This seems to lead to misunderstandings, disputes, and hurt feelings at times. We're all emotional creatures, no one can deny that, but we can do our best to take a small breath before we respond to something, especially if it strikes a nerve, and make sure we're responding to the data at hand and not just what we think. It seems wise that we make sure we're responding to the facts and not just from our personal emotion. The benefit of this is it cuts down on the rumor mills and urban legends that sometimes get passed around as fact. Some of them do sound very believable, I'll give you that. However, we can filter them by finding the actual texts or comments made so we can make an informed decision. So, do you respond based upon emotion or research? If something gets your hot button do you take time to calm down before responding or do you just shoot off an answer? If you do respond hastily do you go back after you're calm and make another post? Do you take the time to research something you come across that may not have a link to the story at hand? Namaste-Anora
8 people like this
10 responses
@sajuman (1855)
• India
29 Mar 09
emotional..i prefer that.. I am a member of mylot for last 3 years..I really enjoyed here..There are some tips to earn maximum from mylot..The first thing is the bulkiness of posts.It is very important that to post with maximum content..It earn more than just responding in single line..The post should contain at least 4 lines.By regularly uploading the maximum nuber of images also boost your earning..Uniform and consistent participation will boost your earning.. Thank you
• United States
29 Mar 09
Saju- Thanks for the tips on earning on Mylot, but that's not quite what I was getting at. Do you think it's ok for a person to answer a post without reading the entire post or article attached and simply based on something like "This topic made me angry so I'm going to respond with anger?" That is where I think the danger might lay with perhaps some of the posts I've seen in the recent weeks. Even I've made the mistake of misreading a post based on title and no research. I have taken the time to go back and post my thoughts based upon the research. And now, I take the time to make sure I know what is being talked about before I respond. Namaste-Anora
1 person likes this
@sajuman (1855)
• India
1 Apr 09
Thanks for the instructions..
1 person likes this
@balasri (26577)
• India
29 Mar 09
I like this discussion because I understand your concern about spreading the false information on impulse which tends to spread like wild fire as the population here is very big.I have seen helplessly so many misconception spread by people carelessly. I always try to give the facts after doing some research and cross check only as I yearn for the right details.Even this morning a friend of mine has stated in a response to my discussion that the inflation in Zambia is nearly 1000.I don't say he is wrong.What he tried to imply was a very big figure .I just searched for the actual figure and found out that the inflation rate is an unbelievable 231,000,000% in Zimbabwe which would make my friend know the exact fact.
2 people like this
• United States
29 Mar 09
Thank you for responding so thoroughly. I like that you handled it with the facts, rather then with "Hey, you're wrong". What a wise wa to handle the situation without too many hurt feelings. I shall have to read your posts because now you have me wondering about this inflation. I worked for a short time with a man here in Minnesota, USA who was from Zambia. Times seem tough all over the world. It is good though that we can come together and try to help others understand the facts, rather than get caught up in the misconceptions. And I agree, online it is much easier for things to spread as you say like a wildfire. Thank you again for your wisdom and thoughts. Namaste-Anora
1 person likes this
@balasri (26577)
• India
29 Mar 09
Thanks a lot Anora.It is discussions like your's that make the mylot irresistible.
2 people like this
• United States
29 Mar 09
Hi there! I would have to say both depending on what the topic is about like right now I am responding to your discussion and all this is based upon my emotions, what I'm thinking or feeling because there really is nothing about this topic to do any research about so I would say depending upon what the topic is that's the only time I will truly do research or give you what I'm thinking........Great Day!!
2 people like this
• United States
29 Mar 09
Well, I can give you that. Some topics are definately based upon opinion or experience and I don't have any issues with those. It seems that those that need research fall inot very specific interests here on Mylot. That said, I try to make sure I know the facts in that area before I post. However, even on the simple ones I don't just answer on everything. If I don't know something about a particular product, I won't make up stuff lol. That's not helpful to anyone else reading. And there are threads that I respond from a mother's heart, especially on parenting threads. Thank you for reminding of us this aspect. Namaste-Anora
1 person likes this
@sandal13 (143)
• India
29 Mar 09
I completely agree with you anora, first of all i personally believ that one should never pass on a comment on something which he/she is unaware of ! because there are people out there who might get a wrong picture reading your review and that would lead to a lot of confussion.I read in a book called "the magic of thinking big" it says that u should be careful in expressing you views on something for example if you say 'I hate mathematics' just question yourself 'what do you know of Mathematics?' It is as simple as that , just question yourslef first do a bit of research and then post your comment cos your comment might effect some one's thinking in a positive or a negative way ......so be careful!
• United States
29 Mar 09
Sandal- Thanks for sharing so openly. I love that book, The Magic of Thinking Big, though I admit it was years ago when I read it! And it's true though, if we simply pass judgement because we don't understand something we may give someone else the wrong idea. I think your example really plays to kids. If I tell my kids or make the comment "I hate veggies", chances are they will now hate veggies not because of their own experience, but because I said it. (Not that I hate veggies mind you lol). We definately must think before we speak. Namaste-Anora
1 person likes this
• China
29 Mar 09
at fist,i log on this website is to earn money and improve my level of english.but when i see some questions that i am interested in.i determine to response it with respect. so i can say that my answers based on emotion.i want to share my ideas with the person who asked the questions.it is my true feeling.
2 people like this
• United States
29 Mar 09
Sharon- Thank you for sharing. Your English is coming along nicely for someone who is practicing. It takes a lot of courage to practice a new language in front of strangers! Kudos to you! I think it's great to share ideas, I just hope we learn to calm down if something hits our soft spot so that we can make sure of our facts before we just loose face and maybe say something we'll regret later on down the road. Namaste-Anora
1 person likes this
• Philippines
29 Mar 09
Most of my postings are based on my personal opinion, emotions and past experiences. I seldom make a research on a certain topic here on myLot.
2 people like this
• United States
29 Mar 09
Sophie- Thanks for taking the time to respond. I don't see anything wrong with sharing one's personal opinion or even experience. That can help someone else see multiple view points. It's when we answer quickly with passion that sometimes we miss the boat, so to speak. Meaning, sometimes we see what we want to see based upon our own personal preconcieved notions, and that at times can get us into trouble. Thanks for the thoughtful response. Namaste-Anora
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Mar 09
I try not to get to emotional when I am responding. Certain topics have pressed my buttons and I try to respond in a way that won't offend the person. I say things like "Why do you think that", and then support my response with a fact. Sometimes this can be annoying to the other person, but at least I am not being rude. As for discussions with articles if I am too busy or don't feel like reading the article, than I don't respond to that discussion. The same goes for if it is a really lengthy discussion. If I can't give it my full attention, I don't wont to respond with a half-a**ed answer that the user may have already pointed out. I know what you mean by those that respond before thinking or reading the whole thing. I guess its expected on a place like this with so much diversity. If they say something really offensive I will point it out and maybe rate them negative. That's really all we can do. BTW I don't get why your rating is a 5? I always enjoy your discussions.
2 people like this
• United States
29 Mar 09
Angela- Thanks for the thoughtful response with good ideas. I sometimes forget the inquiry questions myself, so the reminder is well taken. I like "Why do you think that" approach. It seems that it may help to diffuse a situation and allow the other person the chance to just be heard. I try not to respond to lengthy discussions or those with articles if I'm not fully awake. I feel that would do a disservice to the person who took the time to write it out. I really liked one I read last night that outright asked "Please read the article before responding" in bold letters. It called attention to the fact that their discussion was directly referrencing the article at hand. I typically only mark someone negative if they begin name calling. To me, that's not debating any longer. As for my own rank, I haven't budged over 5 since I started. I've heard many theories to it, but after much thought I refuse to change the person I am just to be with the "in crowd". I would hope people would accept me for who I am lol. And if they don't, that's ok too. Thanks for again for responding and giving readers some new ideas for handling emotional responses. Namaste-Anora
3 people like this
• United States
1 Apr 09
I respond with a little of both depending on the topic if I am too emotional about the topic I will make sure I read it a few times to be sure that I have reason to react the way I did then I respond trying to keep my emotions in check and maintain diplomacy sometimes that doesnt work too well LOL
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Apr 09
I think it happens to us all. We all have that emotional part of our brain that sometimes hijacks our rational brain causing all sorts of issues. I agree, if we simply remain calm and double check, or at least calm ourselves and then double check we'll be much further ahead in the game. Thanks for sharing. Namaste-Anora
@Pose123 (21671)
• Canada
29 Mar 09
Hi Anora, Thank you for a great discussion. When I first came here I was more inclined to respond on emotion, but I believe I have gotten past that now. There are really only one or two topics that get me upset, but I do my best to get past it as I have said. I agree that everyone should check out the facts before responding and we must also remember that we are all different. We were not all raised in the same culture or with the same degree of love and understanding. Some were not taught to respect the beliefs and rights of others. Despite all that we hear about young people today, I believe that a lot of them are better adjusted than some from previous generations. Blessings.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Mar 09
Pose- Thank you for responding. I have to agree, there are a few things that get my blood boiling, but I'm trying to make sure I cool down before I respond so that I respond with facts and not emotion. Not that emotions are not good, but if we allow them to control us we tend to be no better then those around us flinging them about. Again, thank you very much for your thoughtful insights. Namaste-Anora
• Malaysia
29 Mar 09
I have to admit that I am more to topics that touches human emotions and life. It makes me easier to relate to these kind of topics. I write from my heart. It is up to the reader to agree with my views.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Mar 09
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I do agree that sometimes it's nice to write on those selections that are dealing with the human spirit. It is what connects us all, for certain. Do you expect readers to agree with you all the time or do you allow them to disagree with tact? I find that I learn new things every day I'm signed in and sometimes it comes from someone offering me an alternate point of view. Namaste-Anora
2 people like this