Romeo and Juliet story-- I got the lead role! Yipee!

What a wonderful response! Analyzed thoroughly and all aspects taken into account!

Oops!! Hit the wrong button 4.) What's wrong with dating while waiting for the retrogression to lift up? What if it lasts another 10 years? Life goes on, regardless of what the economy is doing. 5.) Most dad's are harsh on a prospective son-in-law. What does the rest of the family think? Mother, aunts, uncles, etc. What does your boyfriend's family think of you? When entering into a potential life-long relationship, the questions that are the most important are your own. What are your goals for what you want in your own new family? What are your BF's goals (and are you happy with them)? Are they realistic? Is he happy with how his family lives, would you be happy living a similar lifestyle? If you need to move to go to where the jobs are...is his willing to go too? In 5 years when you are in the middle of a successful career...who stays home with the kids? These are just a spattering of the questions that you have to ask yourself, and talk to your BF about. Maybe your dad only needs to realize that you ARE taking important issues into consideration? Good luck!

HI catdla, you know what, Ive been trying to respond to you but I dont know, some forces just didnt let me. I have just finished making a one kilometer response but I ended up hitting MYLOT POPULATION!! Grrr and everything of course just went GONE WITH THE WIND. Anyway, if my mom was alive, she would have understood me but still wouldn't go against my father. Because she didnt want to tolerate me doing something which my father hasn't given any blessing yet. I understood her. She was a graceful mother. Miss her actually. And my nest is actually fenced with barbed wire. Duuuh! 1.) Money doesn't buy happiness.---but the lack of it makes marriage a WWII sequel 2.) Sometimes it's less important to have a stable job than it is to have a job. In an unstable economy, there's a lot to be said for someone who gets out there and hustles up work, even if it's not what he wants to do for a living. Nurses are always in demand here...come on over!-----welcome me in your arms,ok?! I love egg sandwich by the way and some lemonade. Harhar 3.) There isn't a family that doesn't have a few skeletons hidden in the closets. It's part of what makes families interesting. Some of the richest families may be good at hiding them, but historians are frequently finding that they have the biggest closets and the most skeletons.-----I wonder what those bones are doing in our bathroom cabinet! Hahaha...I agree. Im slowly thinking you're on my side! :-D 4.) What's wrong with dating while waiting for the retrogression to lift up? What if it lasts another 10 years? Life goes on, regardless of what the economy is doing. ---- that's why while waiting for the retrogression to lift up, I must explore other options. Like Saudi Arabia, or Iran. I would rather love Iran than to be married to someone whom I do not love but I just married because of his money. Well unless he has the face of Josh Hartnett. But good guys seem so hard to come by these days dont you think? 5.) Most dad's are harsh on a prospective son-in-law. What does the rest of the family think? Mother, aunts, uncles, etc. What does your boyfriend's family think of you?----THE REST OF THE FAMILY are ok, well not like their really cheering for him coz they dont know him. It's my father's the only one barring it. With regards to all your questions.....you made me realize though that there's much to talk about. Thanks catdla! Big help!

You make me cry But that would be between you and me. I don't want the guys making fun out of my predicament. Anyway, in a way, I am fighting for him. It's just not in the form of insisting him to my father whose ideas are sometimes...er...most of the time, twisted. But I guess that is how he loves me. Although sometimes, I don't even see it as love seeing how twisted it seems. I am willing to abide. Someday I will take charge of my own life, and my own decisions. And we will prove to him that this guy isn't what he think he is.

Aahaha, sorry for disappointing you kalav....I just needed a catchy title but with a twist! :-D Sigh, yeah. So how are you with that arranged marriage thing? How is ur marriage now?

Hi cupid thanks for that. I do understnd the purpose why my father is opposing to it. And I do want to fulfill those plans because it is for my own good. But should I just break up with my BF because of his economic status? He is a very hardworking person. Opportunities are just not opening up for him right now. And should I break up with him just because his family has problems just like most people in this planet? My BF has no attitude problems. He is the most patient and understanding person I have met. I know that sometimes love is blind but I just find those two reasons for breaking up with him a bit lame.

Hi Dear Well, i never said that leave your BF as his economic status is not good, as u said he is hard worker so i am sure he will achieve his goals of life. And sure you must not be concerned with his family problem as u 2 will have seperate life. All i am saying that dont do anything in hurry and listen to ur father for ur career goals and wait for right time. and trust me, time is best judge as well, with passage of time and with some experience, you will be looking at world with differnt angle and u will be in better position to judge and decide Hope you got my point, its better to wait than to regret. take care

Oh oh I see now. Waiting really isn't a problem (hopefully)! hehe. Thanks cupid! Made me feel better

Thanks for your response. And you're welcome! I liked the way you said it so simply, yet it hit me real hard. the last few days I was in so much confusion as to how to cope with my emotional anguish. I don't know what to think. All I know is, I was so hurt with the idea that my father hates my boyfriend. And it seemed to me that there's nothing I can do to make him accept my boyfriend. I also got confused whether I should break up with him NOW while it isn't too late. I just feel that we can never live a normal life as a couple, so much more when we get married, with my father always watching our backs. So that even if we do love each other, and even if my BF is a very good man, we might never really be happy and at peace. In fact, I am thinking now that if this guy should be taken away from me, I would rather live my life as a spinster, or if I do marry, I would marry someone for money. But that would only make things worse, wnt it?

Hmm, my thoughts on your reply... We cannot expect our parents to accept the person we are in love with but as for me, I will not break up with the person I love just for my parents. It's no disrespect. To me, i just think of it as, I only live one life and I have the right to be happy. I am not marrying my parents. They won't spend the rest of my life with me so I think I have the right to choose. Acceptance comes with time. Sometimes it never does but I don't let that get in the way of what I think/feel. I live for ME. I don't live for them. Taking into consideration, you are a nurse, I am sure that you will not stay in the Philippines and I am certain you will immigrate. It only takes time. Ask yourself whether you are ready to be in a long distance relationship? Can you withstand the distance? Can he? Are you both willing to continue? When it all comes down, you should all be realistic on your capabilities so that you don't fall short of expectations. Think about the future and think about where or not both of you can face the challenges ahead.

Thank you for picking my comment. I hope everything works out to your benefit :-)

Hi lady, falling in love is not easy. It's like a rose. Beautiful but it always has thorns. Yet, I would rather love and be loved and go through all the stresses than live a stress-free life without love. I am fighting for him in a different way. It's just that not in the form defending him to my father because he has made it clear that he will not listen to my reason.

Hi mansha, I am really interested to hear your story. You said that you regret you married your Romeo. Why? Did he turn out to be such a disappointment? Do you think I should listen to my father by breaking up with him now? Or should I take your advice to wait for a year or two. Of course I am not thinkning about marrying my BF right away. I am going to fulfill my plans and be stable. And he has to establish himself too. There's no way I'll earn for both of us while he sits pretty doing nothing. But if my future with him looks bleak, why not end it now??? right? Or should I wait and see? SOS!

I respect my father, and I know he knows what's best for me. But at least he won't size up a person just because at present my BF has no stable job, and that his family has problems. Anyway, thank you for the response. It is a great feeling to talk my feelings over to other people.

At any age Love can blind you. I was 40 when I met the guy I am with know. He is the same as your man. Somehow he just does not seem to get things in the right place. He always has problems with money and weird thing is, he is very intelligent. Everyone needs his help and he is always willing to help others. But, he does not look after his own things. Especially financial things. Just the other day he wanted to tell me how to pay my bills. I could not help but get a little irritated, and told him too look after his own problems before telling me how or what to pay first. He stopped instantly and looked shocked. At the same time he looked ashamed as well. He knows I am right. Just the other day, his mother told me that she had warned me from the beginning. All I could say is, that I know. But what can I do? I love the guy. I am 43 years old now, I still love him. He still has no money and we are still having a hard time financially. But, for the rest he is great to me. He accepts me the way I am and when I get angry he knows his place. hahaha! He knows I don't get angry fast and when I do, I have a good reason. hahaha! So, you love him? Love is hard to find. That is all I can say, the decision is up to you. Personally , I think Love is worth more than money.

Hi dear, oh, Im sorry about the way things turned out for you. No offense, but we do make a lot of mistakes when we are 18.I am 25 now. I know though that age and maturity are not always proportional to each other but do you think I'm still naive and innocent and blinded by love at this age? I can see that my BF is a good and responsible man. He's just poor due to unavoidable circumstances and well maybe , he didn't have ambitions that soared high like mine. It;s not wrong to have an ambition and its not wrong to have lesser ones, but in our case I guess that's one of the problems that I see.

Hi margajoe, took me a while to respond again. I do believe that financial matters do affect every person's relationship. I guess everybody can be financially challenged right. I do admire you in the sense that you speak by expericnce and I couoldn't question you in that. You are right about age being not an assurance of anything. Many mature people commit mistakes like they're 16 or something like. I do lift my relationship up to God. I surrender everything to him. All I know is I love the guy and I dont want to break up with him because of his financial condition. I find the reason too shallow. However, I must secure myself and fulfill my plans. I beleieve that is the best thiong for me to do. :-)

I see, you have gone through so much too. But you know what? I am not Miss All-wisdom but all things in life both bitter and sweet have its reasons that only God knows. But I bet after everything that has happened, you have surfaced as a stronger, better and well....prettier person!

Hello you, how has everything been going? I'm still not okay. I mean as far as my freedom is concerned. And after reading your last reply, you are right, there shouldn't be any regrets.

No problem. Always eager to share anything that could help. The best thing any person in trouble could ever have is both sympathy and empathy for which one could realize certain values, ideals and realities that can never be realized alone. And it's even better and easier if experiences have certain similarities. We can't blame your folks for thinking what they think and trying to control your life. In some way, it's out of concern. On the other hand, it's lack of understanding and acceptance that the times have changed. Most old school folks refuse to bend with the times and go against it as much as they could. But there is still hope. You are only a few steps away from gaining independence and there will no longer be a hold upon you, where you decide what you want your destiny to be. But always bear in mind that every action you take comes with a price. Think well, a million times over before deciding and follow your heart in the process. Take away regret and accept life as it comes, with this you will find your peace. Thank you for wishing me well but I guess hope has faltered this time around. I cannot speak of how things have transpired between us and I know it is mostly my fault, but there is nothing more anyone or anything can do to mend all that has been broken. There probably is a reason it all happened, albeit vague but I know there is. It will come. For now, I have to pick up the pieces of myself and try to put them all together. I wish you well in all your endeavors. Cheers.